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“What about a going-away party?” Penny asked Caleb that night as they were eating dinner. She was great at planning parties, and it would give her something to focus on besides his imminent departure. A way of building up her armor.
His face twisted into a scowl as he stabbed at his turkey meatloaf. “Hell no.”
“Why not?”
“I hate being the center of attention. Besides, who would even come? It’s not like anyone’s going to miss me.”
“I’m going to miss you,” Penny said.
Caleb looked up and their eyes locked across the table for a moment before he looked down at his plate again. “Besides you.”
“Roxanne will miss you.”
“Only until she hires my replacement.”
“Malik and Elyse, then.”
“They’ll miss that I’m usually the one to take the trash out to the dumpster.”
“Your roommates?”
He snorted. “Yeah, nope.”
“Your regular customers will miss you. Charlotte, and Anita with the baby, and that lady who brings her dog. Not to mention everyone in my knitting group.”
Caleb wasn’t buying it. “They’ll all forget about me as soon as I’m gone. The only person besides you who might care is George, and he’s leaving too. Stop trying to make a party happen.”
“But—”
“I’m serious,” he said, starting to sound annoyed. “No party. Promise me.”
“Fine.” So much for Operation Distraction. She turned her attention back to her mashed sweet potatoes, trying not to pout, but pouting a little anyway.
“Hey,” Caleb said softly, and she looked up to find his expression had gentled. “It’s a sweet thought and I appreciate the offer. I just don’t want a party. Okay?”
Penny nodded, her sullenness fading into understanding. “Okay.”
After dinner, they did the dishes together and watched another couple episodes of Brooklyn Nine-Nine—only thirteen left before they finished—until snuggling in front of the TV turned into making out in front of the TV, which eventually turned heated enough that they retired to the bedroom.
It was their usual routine, one they’d fallen into as easily and naturally as breathing. Penny could barely even remember how she’d spent her evenings before Caleb. It was like she’d been holding a spot open for him in her life, and he’d come along and slotted himself into it. A perfect fit.
Hours later, when they both should have been asleep, Penny lay on her side staring at the digital clock on her nightstand. Watching the minutes tick away into hours, which would turn into days, which would be gone before she knew it.
She felt Caleb shift in bed behind her, and then his hand glided over her hip. “Why aren’t you asleep?” he asked, his voice low and raspy.
“I don’t know.”
His hand trailed along her arm and played with her fingers. “Are you okay?”
“Yes,” she lied.
“Really? Because you’ve seemed sort of…” He hesitated like he was searching for the right word, finally settling on, “sad.”
She was sad. Ever since the realization she loved him, it felt like a weight had settled on her chest. One that grew heavier every day. “I’m fine,” she said, trying to force lightness into her voice. It wouldn’t do any good to ruin their remaining time together by dwelling on how little time they had.
“Penelope.” He nuzzled his nose against the back of her neck. “You can talk to me.”
She squeezed her eyes shut and let out a breath. “I know I promised I wouldn’t get attached, but…” Her courage failed her before she could go any further. Bringing the word love into the conversation was like going nuclear. It would change everything, and she didn’t want anything to change.
