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I bristle a little at the way he says it, but I don’t reply, and sit back, exchanging a glance with an amused Alex.
“Take care,” he says softly before heading for the door. The others say goodbye to me and Leia, then follow him.
James says goodbye to them all, and then they head out to the front gate, and he closes the door behind them.
Tucking Leia’s blanket around her, I hear his footsteps as he comes back to me.
I stiffen as he stands in front of me. Is he going to berate me for trying to tell him what to do? Make it clear that I’m just Leia’s nanny, and I’m not his girlfriend, and I can’t pass comment on his life and his choices?
I wait for him to yell at me. But instead, he lowers down onto the sofa, leans an elbow on the back, and rests his head on his hand.
I watch Leia blow a tiny bubble, and dab the muslin square at the corners of her mouth. Then I look at James.
To my surprise, he’s watching me, not her.
“Are you going to yell at me?” I ask.
“Why would I do that?”
“For bossing you around.”
“Maybe I like that.”
We both smile.
“Thank you,” he says.
“What for?”
“For agreeing to look after Leia, especially after I was such an arsehole to you.”
I sigh. “You weren’t an arsehole.”
“I was, and I’m sorry for it. But it’s done.”
“It’s okay. Don’t be so hard on yourself.”
He stares out at the dark garden moodily.
“What’s bothering you?” I ask after a while.
His gaze comes back to me. “What do you mean?”
“You’re angry. I can see that. Is it just because Maddie died? Or is it something more?”
He gives a short, humorless laugh, then runs a hand through his hair. “Yeah, I’m angry.”
“Why?”
“Because she named me Leia’s guardian even though she knew I didn’t want children.”
“I doubt she ever envisaged this happening.”
“Unless she took her own life.”
I hadn’t thought of that.
“Last night,” he continues, “she berated me for not wanting kids. Talk about have the last laugh.”
