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Dante picks up the last of the boxes, and we walk back into the apartment. Nyx and Leo are in the corner , mapping out her loft and office on the floor. She nods her head excitedly at whatever he just said, and I smile at how easily they mesh.
“Is this all of it?” I ask, looking at the mountain of boxes and random furniture thrown around the apartment.
“That’s it. We sent the movers on their way, so they’d stop charging you their hourly rate, the pricks. Charging you while sitting around on their asses, not doing a damn thing.” Lucian cracks his knuckles and shakes out his hands.
“People have to earn a living, Lucian. It’s no big deal. I knew what I hired when I called them,” Nyx says, waving off his comment and just grumbles something about fair value for hard labor under his breath.
I start stacking boxes along the wall, moving them out of the path that cuts through the apartment. Cole grabs the box I was bending for and carries it over to the rest. “Let me help,” he says.
My heart skips a beat, and I can’t figure out how I’m supposed to react to this version of Cole, so unlike the last two encounters we’ve had where he was cold and distant. “Thank you,” I whisper.
I pick up a box marked Bathroom, and Cole picks up another, following me.
“Devin, can I talk to you for a minute, please?” he asks. I stop in my tracks and close my eyes, not sure I want to hear where this is going. The blackmail was clear, and I can’t risk letting my heart hope.
“I’m sorry, Devin. I should have told you what was going on. You never should have found out about Amber the way you did. It’s just—”
I drop my box and turn around, catching a quick glance of Lucian and Otis as they walk away, giving us some privacy, though that’s the last thing I want right now.
“Look, Cole, we shared a drink and a nice conversation a year ago. We both went our own ways, you to enjoy a night with whomever you enjoyed, and me with three of your friends, it seems. You don’t owe me anything, really, we’re cool.”
“You don’t understand,” he says, taking a breath to continue, but I hold up a hand to stop him.
“That’s the beauty of this, Cole. I don’t need to understand. I don’t own you, not even a little. So, you don’t owe me an explanation for why you’re choosing to marry her. I wish you all the happiness in the world.” I turn around and squeeze my eyes shut and silently breathe out, holding back the tears pooling in my eyes and willing my heart to stop cracking.
I reach down to pick up the box I dropped when another box hits the floor behind me, and a body crowds my space, forcing me deeper into the dark corner behind the bathroom wall.
Cole spins me around, pinning me with my back against the wall, l out of sight of the others. With one hand on my hip, the other wrapping around my throat, not squeezing, just holding me in place. His knee presses between my thighs, keeping me from trying to walk away.
I let my body ease into his control, not fighting against the powerful display. It’s oddly intoxicating.
In a low, quiet voice, he growls, “I don’t give two fucks about Amber. I fucking want you, Devin. I’ve wanted you since the moment you stole that stool next to me at the bar. I’ve thought about you. Hired a goddamn private investigator to hunt you down in Jersey. I battle with myself every fucking day to keep from coming to see you, if only for a night, to get you out of my system. I don’t know how you did it, how you infected me so completely, so quickly, but you did.
“Four months ago, I thought I was finally moving on, but now here you are.” His hand on my hip wraps around to my lower back, pressing our hips together. “Looking as beautiful and delicious as the first time I saw you.”
He releases my neck and trails his fingers from my hair down my face. “The fucking problem is, if I take what I want, if I let myself give in to this desire, not only will I lose everything, but a lot of other innocent people will get hurt.”
I swallow around the lump forming in my throat as Cole stares at my mouth, his tongue poking out to lick along his lips. “Cole,” I whisper.
“Just one. I need to know.” His lips crash down on mine. It isn’t sweet or soft, this is hurried and demanding. It’s a battle of wills, a final meal before being led to the gallows, a last goodbye.
When he pulls back, his eyes are closed, his breathing ragged. “I wish this could be different, but I can’t be selfish.” He opens his eyes and brings his hands up to cup my face and places one final kiss on my lips before walking away, leaving me against the wall, my mind whirling with a thousand incoherent thoughts.
I bring my fingers up, tenderly touching my lips, and peer around the corner of the wall. Nyx glances over to Cole, who walks out of the apartment, then over to me. Are you okay? she mouths, and I shake my head.
No, I am not fucking okay. What the fuck was that?
I pick up Nyx’s boxes and take them into the bathroom, sliding them into the bottom of the closet. The door clicks behind me, and I turn around quickly. Nyx stands there with a concerned look on her face.
“What’s going on?” she asks, taking my shoulders and leading me to sit on the closed toilet.
“He-he kissed me. He said he wants me, but if he gives in to me, other people will get hurt. He was going to tell me why he can’t be with me, but I cut him off and didn’t let him explain. But that kiss, Nyx, it was … wow.” I touch my lips, still feeling the press of his chapped lips sliding along mine. I hold my fingers there, like I can hold on to the feeling of his mouth on mine forever.
“Devin, if you want me to, I’ll find out what’s going on and see if I can help. All you have to do is ask.”
I jump up and wrap my arms around her neck, squeezing her tight. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
She pats my back. “Can’t … breathe.”
