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“Let me explain…”
I charge off away from him, determined not to give him another second of my time.
“Natalie?” he yells, and I stop but don’t turn around. “Please?”
My heart begs me to let him explain himself, but then I see Laura and Kate watching on, laughing at me, and my brain takes over.
“Consider our friendship over,” I yell back at him.
His face drops, and he takes a step towards me. I put my hand up to keep him in place.
“Seriously, Matthew. I can’t be friends with someone who isn’t being honest with me.”
He opens his mouth and I take off, running this time, to get away from him. From Laura and her cruel words. From all of it.
How could I have let myself believe that someone as amazing as Matthew freaking Barkly would ever want someone as plain as me?
*****
My prayers of an empty house to greet me and my tears go unanswered when I open the front door and pummel straight into my grandmother. My Yia-Yia.
“Natalia!?” She always calls me by the Greek version of my name, stating that the Greeks do everything better. “Little One, what happened?”
I sob into her arms, unable to tell her what happened. The shame of being duped by Matthew is too raw to put into words.
“Is it a boy?” she guesses astutely.
I nod, more tears falling as a kaleidoscope of memories with Matthew fills my mind. Had any of it been real?
“Ah, my darling girl.” She rubs my back. “You’ll be OK. Just let yourself feel the pain. Having your heart broken is normal when you’re young. Whoever he is, he’ll just be a memory for you one day. Someone that you used to know.”
I hiccup into her shoulder and wonder if that will ever be true. The feelings I have for Matthew are so big, I can’t imagine ever loving someone the way I love him.
“I hope you’re right, Yia-Yia. Because I don’t think I can live with feeling like this forever.”
She kisses my forehead and walks to the kitchen, muttering about making some tea to help me heal. I watch her leave and then flop onto the couch, more tears spilling down my cheeks.
Oh, Matthew. How could you do this to me?
*****
“Are you sure it’s true?” Bianca asks for the tenth time in two days. I’d told her the whole sorry story the night it happened, over a marathon phone conversation, and she still can’t seem to wrap her mind around it. It would be flattering if it weren’t so annoying.
“He pretty much admitted it.” Tears sting my eyes and I blink rapidly, not wanting to bring my blubbering mess energy to school with me.
“But you’ve never given him a chance to explain. And I heard he’s not even going to the school formal. That the team are all begging him to change his mind.”
I pause at this. Is it true he’s not going at all? With anyone?
“That doesn’t change anything,” I tell her as we walk down the corridor. “He lied to me, B. He was pretending to be my friend all as part of some elaborate dare.”
The words taste bitter in my mouth and I wish this day would end, so that I can be done with the school year. Done with it all.
My best friend frowns at me. “It just doesn’t sound right. He’s so into you, Nat. I’m convinced he’s in love with you.”
“Turns out, he’s just a really good actor.”
The two of us grind to a halt when the man himself steps in front of us. He looks so unlike the Matthew I know, with red-rimmed eyes and dishevelled hair, that I only just refrain from asking him what’s wrong.
