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“I look forward to seeing how you react tonight, my new friend.” Shaking my hand, Victor let me go and waved at the laptop. “It’s encrypted to the highest level. All transactions are untraceable. The bank account number is written on the Post-it right there.”
Fishing my useless phone from my pocket, I held it up. “All my banking details are on here. Wouldn’t it be easier to turn off your signal scrambler and let me make the payment from my own device?”
His eyes narrowed infinitesimally. “I’m afraid not. My guests are all aware that staying in my residence means forfeiting their devices and connections. Nothing can be sent in or out unless it’s on my servers.”
Interesting.
My mind immediately launched into a covert mission on how I could break into his office and send GPS coordinates to Q.
“But what if those who come to stay need to remain in touch with the outside world?” I asked, playing dumb.
“That’s the price of paradise.” Victor stepped away. “Only you can decide if you’re willing to pay it.” Moving toward the tan leather couch, he sprawled out and tapped his finger against the arm. “In your own time, Henri.”
Unable to hide my scowl, I grabbed the desk chair, sat down, and placed my fingers on the laptop keys. Thank fuck Q had transferred thirty million into my personal account. I didn’t have to worry about software recording my every keystroke or seeing the Mercer last name. For all my online stuff, I still went by Ward.
Logging into my banking, I copied the number Victor had scribbled down, then pressed PAY NOW.
I probably had all kinds of alerts on me thanks to a huge deposit followed by a substantial withdrawal. The tax man would think I’d won the lottery and gone on a spending spree.
I felt no guilt whatsoever as Q’s money vanished into Victor’s account, and the laptop automatically locked me out.
Looking at Victor across the office, I stood. “It’s done.”
“Excellent.” He rose elegantly from the couch and strolled to the exit. “I’ll wait until its deposited and then we’ll celebrate. Lunch will be served in an hour. You’re welcome to do whatever you wish. Join us or not, your decision.” He grinned as I stepped past him into the arrow-slitted corridor. “Enjoy yourself, Ward. Pleasure doing business with you. Ta-ra.”
He shut the door in my face.
* * * * *
I stood beneath the icy pinpricks of my second shower of the day.
Unlike my last shower, I didn’t grab Ily’s underwear and masturbate. I wasn’t jittery with nerves about going downstairs and acting my ass off. I wasn’t twisted up with fears that I wouldn’t have to act at all. That I’d fall and fall and become one of them.
All I felt was sick.
Violently, viciously sick.
My back convulsed as I bent forward and retched. Nothing came up. I hadn’t eaten since lunchtime yesterday, yet it didn’t stop acidic bile burning the back of my throat as my body retched again and again, making me claw at the tiles.
I’d felt fine walking away from Victor’s office. I’d been okay as I climbed down curving stairs and stepped onto my floor. And I’d felt mildly unwell as I found my room and entered.
But the moment the door slammed behind me, the loneliness I’d been afflicted with my entire life pounced.
It pounced hard.
I barely made it to the toilet for the first convulsion.
A lifetime of being on my own crushed me with familiar pain.
Until four months ago, I’d never understood what I’d done wrong for my mother to recoil from me. Why she flinched if I got too close. Why she looked at me with fear in her eyes. For almost three decades, I thought I’d done something terrible. Something I’d tried to apologise for but was never forgiven. Thanks to her deathbed confessions, I finally understood she hadn’t been afraid of me—she’d been afraid of the man who sired me. The man who’d donated this sickening piece of DNA that made it impossible to survive.
I wished I could throw it up—get it out of me.
I hated that even though I’d found out I had a brother, he would rather kill me for something I couldn’t control than teach me how to be better.
He didn’t care about me.
Just like my mother didn’t want me.
