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“Maybe not. But I can.” Roman steps forward from the doorway. I jump a little at his approach. I didn’t even know he was here. I didn’t hear him come in.
“What is he doing here?” Austin mumbles, his eyes starting to close again.
“We can talk about that another time. You need to rest, and I need to go tell the doctors you’ve woken up.” I try to reassure him.
He doesn’t respond as he returns to his slumber.
“I’M GOING TO HAVE TO go back home tomorrow, you realize.” I turn in Roman's arms as we lazily lay entwined together in his bed. God, he’s a sight to behold. The muscles in his arms are still flexed from sex, and his golden skin is slick with sweat. He is magnificent. Over the last three weeks, I’ve seen a whole different side to Roman. I have spent my days at the hospital with Austin and then the nights with Roman. We still have not had the hard conversation that lingers in the air between us like stale meat. Instead, we ignore the stench of it and fell into a routine of dinner, conversation, and sex every evening. I still haven’t returned to the office. Roman keeps insisting the temp assistant is doing fine and that Austin needs me more than him. I’ve also noticed my regular pay keeps going into my bank account despite my lack of work. I guess, I have not said anything in protest because one: I need the money to pay rent, and two: I know that protest would lead to another conversation that we’ve both been avoiding.
“You are not going back to that place.”
“I have to, Roman. Austin gets released from the hospital tomorrow.”
“I have a spare room. Austin can stay in there.”
“I don’t think Austin would like that. Besides, you said it was safe to return.” Roman had arranged for a few of his investigation team members at the office to look into my apartment getting broken into and also me being followed. They couldn’t trace it back to Moretti's boys, but Roman suspected it was Liam trying to scare me. Both of which are no longer any concern. Moretti had the boys taken care of, just as Roman had advised, but I didn’t have the stomach or courage to ask for details, so I left it well alone. As for Liam, Roman’s father flew him, his wife, and their kids to London to work on the firm the family had just purchased. Roman doesn’t believe he’ll have any further trouble with Liam because, in the end, he got what he wanted. It’s not the company he was hoping for, but it's a company of his own to run all the same.
“Safe as it could be in that part of town.” He huffs.
I frown up at him, poking him in the ribs. “Hey.”
“Hey yourself.” He pokes me back, and I giggle. “No, it’s not just that. I don’t think I could sleep at night knowing you’re there and knowing what it’s been like to have you in my bed every night.”
“You’ll just miss the sex.” I chuckle. I like this lightness of him. Since Liam's absence, Roman has a newfound calmness. He seems so much less irritated and stressed. He says it's because of me, but I doubt I could hold that much power over a man such as Roman.
“I’m serious, Indie.” He scoots down in the bed, so he is now face to face with me.
“So am I, Roman. I have to go home. I mean, what even are we? What are we doing here?” There, I said it. It was inevitable and became unavoidable. I hold my breath, waiting for him to respond.
His forehead furrows as he studies my face for a while. “I don’t know. I guess we’re still figuring out where we fit in each other's lives. Isn’t that the point though? Aren’t we just learning who we are, what we mean to one another.”
Jesus, what the hell do I say to that? He just committed to me, without committing to me. “I suppose.” I stare into those beautiful chocolate eyes. “Do I come back and work for you?”
“I think we cross that bridge when we come to it. Right now, Austin still needs you.”
I sigh. “I need to work, Roman. You can’t keep paying me like you’ve been.”
“Why not?”
“Because I’m not comfortable with that, and if this doesn’t work out between us, then...” I drift off as he leans in and kisses me.
“That’s not fair,” I say underneath our kiss, and it’s not, but it doesn’t stop me from kissing him back.
He pulls away and considers me for the longest moment. “Look, we don’t have to figure it all out now, but if it makes you feel more comfortable...” He exaggerates the words. “Then how about I commission you to replace all the artwork in our offices.”
“What?” I sit up straight in the bed dragging the sheet with me to cover my naked chest. I don’t know why I’m being so modest. His tongue was literally between my thighs no more than twenty minutes ago. I guess, I feel in this conversation I need that security, that confidence.
“I want you to replace all of the artwork in our offices with your photographs. It’s a win-win, as far as I see it. I get to see your amazing work on my walls every day, and you, in return, get paid and also gain some recognition. With the clientele we have come into our firm, you may even get some further commissions.”
I smile, shaking my head at this crazy, wonderful man. “You are too good to me. You’re such a conflicting man, Roman Judge. Just when I think I have you figured out, you surprise me once again.”
Roman may have his dark sides to him, but they are so easy to ignore when I get to see this whole other part of him. The part where he’s funny and makes me laugh. The part where he’s gentle and generous, both in and out of the bed. The part of him that protects me, nurtures me, and encourages me to grow. These parts of Roman, I can easily fall in love with. In fact, I’m almost certain I’m already there. But I know eventually that darkness will creep in, and it will all start mattering to me again. that part frightens me. It scares me how quickly we have gone from enemies to lovers, friends to confidants. This could go as quickly as it came, and I know the loss would be more than I could bear right now.
He rolls me over and pins my hands above my head, his weight pressing down on me, his face a mere inch from mine. “Didn’t anyone ever tell you not to judge a book by its cover?”
I laugh at him, kiss him, and just enjoy this moment I have with him.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
