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“I like looking at you,” I respond, giving him a featherlight kiss against his jaw. I’m rewarded with a small sleepy smile, one that makes my stomach flutter.
He traces my face with his fingertips, barely touching me in the spots that I know are probably deeply bruised. His eyes are solemn, “I thought I’d lost you.” His forehead rests against mine as if he can’t stand to be any further apart.
“But, you didn’t. You found me. I’m safe, because of you.” My hands cradle his cheeks, bringing his mouth to mine, needing to kiss him. To feel him. His lips sealed over mine, not wavering. Connecting him to me, like we both so desperately needed.
“I’ll make sure you’re safe for the rest of your life. I won’t ever screw up again,” he vows, breaking my heart. He carries so much unwarranted guilt, a weight he doesn’t deserve.
“None of this is your fault, Nathan. None of it. I’m only here because of you. My heart is still beating because of you, because of your risks. You’re the hero in my story, don’t blame yourself for anything. I screwed up. I let them trick me into being caught.” I shake my head in disbelief at myself, feeling stupid for falling for it so easily.
“You thought I was hurt, and came back for me. It just shows how big your heart is. I don’t deserve it.” He kisses each of my cheeks lightly, then my nose.
“You deserve the world, Nathan,” I say breathlessly as I kiss him again.
He shakes his head. “I don’t want the world unless you’re in it. I only see a future for myself now because of you. You are everything worth living for. I don’t want anything else,” he whispers against my lips, not daring to put distance between us. “I love you, Callie.”
“I love you, too. So much.” Even with how close we are, I can see the intensity in his eyes. I get what no one else does, the emotions written all over his face. His feelings, expressions, the good and bad, he allows me to see him. Every version. Every part.
* * *
We spend the next few hours lazily together on the couch, each movement I make is a reminder of the beating I endured last night. My stomach is bruised and so are my ribs, but I keep my breaths short, not letting myself inhale deeply enough for my lungs to inflate all the way. It’s pretty miserable, and I’m sure it will be worse tomorrow, but I’m alive.
Luckily, my throat is only a little sore, completely manageable compared to the rest of my body. The skin around my neck is painfully sensitive, but I refuse to look, afraid the sight of it will send me spiraling.
Other than a few looks of regret from Nathan when he catches me wincing and hardly leaving my side for one second, he seems completely calm and collected. Even though the police are on their way to question us about what happened. He assured me that he took care of everything, and promised that there was nothing to worry about. But, I am worried. I watched two men die last night, technically by Sheriff Donahue’s hand, but Nathan was pulling the strings. I was complicit in their murders, even though I was originally their victim. I’m also happy that they’re dead. As fucked up as that might be, I think the world is safer now that they are gone.
He also filled me in on everything else that happened while I was being manhandled by Tony before I even knew he had come to rescue me. I just hope Doris is long gone and safe. I don’t know how involved she was after luring me to them with her phone call, but she didn’t deserve to be beaten and raped.
He explained how Jesse helped him find me, admitting that if it weren’t for him, he’d probably still be running around in circles trying to figure out where they took me. I made a mental note to thank him for my life when I finally meet him.
The morning turns to the afternoon when finally the police arrive. To my surprise, Trooper Malec is the one taking our statements. He’s younger than I thought he would be, and tall. Very tall. I imagined a similar version of Sheriff Donahue, old and washed out. Instead, he looks closer in age to Nathan, and almost as good looking. His reserved demeanor reminds me of Nathan’s stoicism as well, almost making me wonder if he served in the military too. Or if they could be friends.
He explained that he requested to be put on the case when he found out we were involved. A few times his eyes linger on me, focusing on my bruises, a guilty look plaguing his face. He knew I was in trouble when Nathan originally contacted him, and he was powerless to help me, confined by the law and his higher-ups. I understand, and I don’t blame him.
He goes over their findings at the hunting cabin and their prediction of what went down -Sheriff Donahue panicked when he realized I had escaped, killing the brothers and then himself, knowing he would be persecuted once I went to the police.
Malec hesitates, his eyes boring into Nathan’s. “As far as I’m concerned, this is a pretty cut-and-dry investigation. There isn’t any reason for us to believe anything else went down after you set Callie free… Just do me a favor, and lay low for a while. Don’t give anyone a reason to question your story.”
Nathan doesn’t humor him with a response, a silent understanding passing between them, but he does shake his hand when the trooper turns to leave. Making me the only one in the room even slightly overwhelmed by his implication.
I breathe a sigh of relief when he’s gone, exhausted from putting on the charade. I had to put on my best face, acting completely surprised to hear of their deaths, as if Nathan hadn’t told me all of it already. As if he hadn’t already told me exactly why he staged the scene as he did. I’m exhausted by how fast my mind has been racing with worry. Worry about being caught, worry that Nathan would get in trouble, that we would crack and accidentally tell Trooper Malec what really happened.
I asked Nathan before he arrived how he could pretend this was all normal, and why he wasn’t freaking out like me. His cool demeanor was completely different from my anxiety-ridden state.
He explained, “I learned a long time ago how to be invisible. A lot of people don’t realize that the United States Army doesn’t want war heroes, they want ghosts.”
The far away look in his eyes as he told me is something that will probably always be there. He hasn’t told me everything he’s done, and I’m sure a lot of things he never will, but I’ll always be here to pull him back out of the past, to stay in the present. With me.
Chapter Fifty-Three
Callie
After a couple of days, my ribs were healing well enough that I felt like I could ride in the car without being in too much pain. Sudden movements and deep inhales still made me wince, but I felt like I could handle the slight jostle of a moving vehicle. Against Nathan’s hesitancy, I insisted we make the trip back to Tennessee to retrieve my stuff from my parents’ house. My car, which is still impounded as evidence, should be released sometime next week according to Trooper Malec.
I am ready to move on with my life. I don’t want to feel like a victim. Without the threat of kidnapping or death looming over my head, I’m ready to start this next chapter with Nathan. I am ready to make the move official because he’s already become home to me, there’s nowhere else I want to be.
For the first time in my life, I know I’m exactly where I belong. The few days I spent healing after the incident were just that, healing. Nathan pampered me with hot baths and delicate touches. I wasn’t stuck in my head, worried about my next plan, or afraid that I was doing the wrong thing. Despite everything, I was content and happy.
So, we spent the last two days at my parents, packing up all of my things into Nathan’s truck. The only tears shed were when I was saying my goodbyes because this time I knew that when I left my parent’s house, it was final. I know my days of using them as a safety net are over, and the next journey of my life is starting.
