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Akira looks blankly at me.
“I do not believe I had a choice in the matter, Akira.” My eyes skitter to Dejonae’s desk again.
“Ryotaro,” Akira urgently approaches my desk, “you have been down this road before. The last time, it did not end well.”
“Ashanti and I did not divorce because she was a foreigner. Nor because of my family.”
“Do you really believe that?” Akira’s eyes dart between mine. “If you had secured the approval of the family, would they not have rallied around you? Would they not have done everything to make her feel at home and welcome? Would they not have encouraged her to come back? They did not. They rejoiced when she left. They hid it well, but they reveled in your heartbreak.”
“Are you provoking me deliberately?”
“I would not speak out of turn if it were not important.”
She is right. This is the longest scolding Akira has ever given me.
“I only want to point out the truth. Something which you seem determined to ignore. Miss Williams is not only foreign and dark-skinned, but she is much younger than you, Ryotaro. The differences between what you value, what you believe, and what you want in life simply cannot match hers because she has experienced so little. If you look beyond her beauty and her affinity for Niko, you would be able to recognize that.”
My eyes linger on Akira’s tightened brows. “Whether I choose to pursue her or not, it will be my decision.”
“You misunderstand.” Akira lowers her head. “I am not saying you cannot pursue her. If you choose to… experience the American way, you have all freedom to do so. As I mentioned, you are accomplished and wealthy. You are also a man. It is natural to feel loneliness.” She shifts in discomfort. “You are not the first Sazuki that I have worked beside. I have seen how the lures of the world can draw a young man to… experiment.”
My heart rebels. “Miss Williams is not an experiment to me.”
Akira purses her lips.
“If I, indeed, saw her as something to experience, I would not be so hesitant. It is precisely because my interest in her is deepening that it requires my careful consideration.”
“Then consider this, Ryotaro, and this is the final thing I will say about the matter.”
I nod.
“You went against the family to wed Niko’s mother and shattered your grandparent’s hearts. This time, you have Niko watching you. What if you take her new friend and turn her into something more? And what if that relationship does not work out? Then you have not only failed twice, but this time, the heart you will shatter is your child’s. Are you willing to risk that?”
Satisfied that she has delivered her final blow, Akira jerks her chin down once and stalks out of my office.
* * *
I work outsideof the foundation because Dejonae’s desk is too big of a distraction for me.
At evening’s end, I pick Niko up from school.
She seems eager to discuss her day, gesturing excitedly about her invitation to the farmhouse, Bailey’s joke at recess that he shared via sign language, and Beth gifting her a ‘Hand Me That Wrench’ T-shirt.
Her hands will cramp later tonight from all the signing.
I cut up an apple to tide her over until dinner. She shoves an entire slice into her mouth and continues gesturing.
“Dad, when can I go to the farmhouse again?”
“Maybe after your mock exams,” I allow. Opening the fridge with my shoulder, I take out a pile of leftover food dishes.
I am thinking of making rice balls and corn soup. Our fridge is always filled withtsukemonothanks to Akira’s ability to pickle everything that can possibly be pickled. It will pair well with the meal.
“I can’t wait to tell mom.” Slowly, Niko’s smile fades to intense concentration. She signs, “Did mom talk to you?”
“Talk to me about what?” I ask, checking on the rice cooker. When I glance up again, Niko is waiting for me.
She signs, “Deej.”
