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It didn’t help her mood any that everyone kept telling her how great they were together as soon as Dylan’s back was turned.
“Oh my god, you two are the cutest!” Jinny squealed after Dylan went off with Yemi to fetch them fresh drinks.
“Thanks,” Brooke replied and knocked back a mouthful of wine.
Dylan had grown increasingly handsy as the evening wore on. No more than he had been over the last couple days—which previously she had enjoyed quite a lot—but now he was doing it in front of people she knew. He’d been mostly hands-off at the picnic, in deference to the fact that it was a professional event for her, but now that they were socializing with her friends he was being openly affectionate.
Brooke hadn’t done anything to discourage him the first time he’d rested his hand in the small of her back, and he’d since escalated to brushing her hair off her shoulder and stroking her arm, sending a clear signal to everyone that they were a couple.
Which they weren’t.
It had been fine to pretend when they were surrounded by strangers at Venice Beach or the Getty, or alone in her apartment, but letting her friends think they were together made her uncomfortable. Tomorrow Dylan would be gone without a backward glance, and Brooke would be the one left to face the prying questions and pitying looks.
Once all the guests had arrived and the waiters had supplied everyone with flutes of champagne, a band named Savage Oxide took the stage. The bass player was a friend of Caleb’s from the coffee shop where he used to work, and he led a toast to the newlyweds before launching into a very respectable cover of Alabama Shakes’s “I Found You.” Penny dragged Caleb onto the dance floor, and one by one the other couples began to follow their lead.
Dylan held his hand out to Brooke. “Shall we?”
“Sure.” Conflicting emotions warred within her as she let Dylan lead her away. Dancing with him was one of the things she’d been most looking forward to tonight. But now that they were here, it wasn’t playing out the way she’d imagined. She couldn’t shake this nagging feeling that everything was going wrong.
Dylan’s arms wrapped around her, and she tried to relax in the comfort of his embrace. By all accounts, she should be happy. This was exactly what she’d wanted. As she clung to him, she cast her mind back over the last several days, trying to recapture that contented feeling. But no matter how hard she tried, it continued to elude her.
Brooke watched Penny and Caleb across the room, clenched together on the dance floor, and wondered what was wrong with her that she didn’t want what they had.
No, that wasn’t right. It wasn’t that she didn’twantwhat they had, so much as she didn’t believe she could ever properly enjoy it. She’d love to be able to give herself up to another person like that, but she just couldn’t see that ever happening. It wasn’t in her nature.
There was no sense fantasizing about something she wasn’t capable of. Better not to let yourself want it in the first place, so you wouldn’t be disappointed when you didn’t get it.
Dylan ran a hand down her back and pressed a kiss against her temple. As they swayed together under the fairy lights, striking a romantic pose, Brooke was acutely, uncomfortably aware of how many people were watching them and silently making plans for their future wedding, because that was what people did at these things. It was ridiculous.
When the song ended, the band launched into a rousing version of Bruno Mars’s “Marry You,” and Brooke excused herself to go to the bathroom.
As she freshened up her makeup, she tried to talk herself out of her sour mood. This was all just because of that stupid award. It had thrown her into a funk that she needed to shake herself out of. Dylan was just being his normal, lovely self, and it was unfair to take her bad mood out on him when he was being a perfect date.
Yes, the news about the award had been a disappointment, but it was dumb to let it ruin her last night with Dylan. Life was full of disappointments. If you put yourself out there, chances were good you’d be let down. She shouldn’t have been surprised to learn the game was rigged. Most games that mattered were.
Now that the initial shock had passed, Brooke wasn’t even upset about all the hard work that had been wasted. She was mostly mad at herself for getting her hopes up in the first place. She knew better than to let herself believe she had a chance at something like that.
Never wager on the long shot.Your money and your hopes were better spent on the safe bet, even if the payout was smaller.
Once she was done with her lipstick and her pep talk, Brooke took a deep breath and headed out to the party again. On her way back from the restroom, she bumped into Penny.
“Dylan is adorable!” she squealed, giving Brooke an impromptu hug outside the ladies’ room. “I love him, and I love you together.”
“We’re not really together,” Brooke tried to explain, but Penny ignored her protest.
“He’s so sweet! And cute! I didn’t expect a model to be so down-to-earth, but he totally is. That one’s definitely a keeper.”
But he wasn’t a keeper, and Brooke wished everyone would stop acting like he was. Tomorrow morning he’d turn back into a pumpkin, and that would be that. Brooke’s stint as Cinderella to Dylan’s Prince Charming would be over.
When she got back to the party, she spotted Dylan on the dance floor, cutting loose to an Earth, Wind and Fire cover with Jinny and Yemi. Brooke watched him, marveling at how carefree he seemed and envious of his ability to fit in anywhere with such ease. He’d always been like that, and she’d always struggled to keep up with him.
He spotted her standing off to the side by herself and beckoned for her to join him. Unable to think of an excuse not to, but not feeling especially moved to boogie down, she dragged her feet as she made her way over to him.
Her grudging steps brought her to Dylan just as the song was ending. He grasped her hand and twirled her as the last lively notes played, pulling her into his arms when the band transitioned into a Ray LaMontagne song. His hands settled on her hips as he held her close, and Brooke wound her arms around his neck. The scent of his cologne filled her senses as she rested her cheek against his chest. Closing her eyes, she breathed in a lungful of him and tried to enjoy the moment and the warmth of his body pressed against hers as they swayed to the music.
It was no use. The sense of impending catastrophe she’d been fighting all day refused to let go. It intruded on her thoughts, mingling with the slow, sad song. Her throat burned as she struggled to contain her emotions.
Dylan must have felt the change in her demeanor, because he tilted her chin up to give her a questioning look. Brooke tried to offer him a reassuring smile, but his frown only deepened.
