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Dylan looked down at his shoes, like he was gathering himself together. When he looked up again his face was devoid of expression. Cold and empty and beautiful, like one of his photo spreads for some super-luxury brand where the models all looked like they’d been molded out of clay.
“Are you saying you don’t want me to move here?” His voice was as remote as his expression. “Because that’s sure how it seems.”
Brooke started to pace again, this time with added hand-wringing. “Where did moving here even come from? How did I not know you were thinking about this? You’ve been making plans and having meetings and taking calls all week and keeping it from me why?”
“I didn’t want to tell you until I was sure.”
“Sure of what?”
“Sure I wanted to get involved in this business venture…and sure that there was something real between us, and it wasn’t just wishful thinking on my part.”
So hewasdoing this to be with her. An alarm klaxon sounded in her head.Danger. Relationship catastrophe imminent.
“Oh god,” she moaned, rubbing her forehead with the heels of her hands to try and make the noise stop.
“Can you just be still for one goddamn second?” Dylan snapped.
She stopped and spun around to face him. He never raised his voice at her. Ever.
“You didn’t answer my question,” he said more quietly.
“What question?” There was a hollow pit growing where her stomach should be. Pretty soon it would swallow her up.
“Do you not want me to move here?”
“I can’t make that decision for you.”
His temper flared again. “Goddammit, I’m not asking you to.” She watched him take himself in hand, packing all the emotion away as that hollow blankness took over his face again. “I’m asking if you want to see if this could work.”
“What isthis? What are you envisioning for us?” She couldn’t envision anything right now but misery, heartbreak, and the utter destruction of the most important friendship in her life.
“A relationship. Arealrelationship.”
“I don’t want to be anyone’s girlfriend. I told you that.”
“No, you said you didn’t want to be anyone’s long-distance girlfriend.”
“I don’t want to be either.”
He closed his eyes and drew a long breath. “I see.”
He really didn’t. If he was seeing clearly, he’d know how insane this idea of his was. He’d never have suggested it. His brain was fogged by vacation sex and nostalgia for a past that could never be recaptured.
The lines of risk were so clear. Someone like Dylan could never be content with someone like her—and Brooke could never be content with anyone. It was just a matter of time before they grew to resent each other, and that resentment would poison everything between them.
“If you lived here, how long do you actually think we would last as a couple?” she asked him.
“I don’t know.” He threw his hands up. “I was sort of hoping for forever.” He looked more sad than angry now, and she hadn’t missed his use of the past tense.
“I’m just trying to be realistic.” She said it in the same soothing tone you’d use with a toddler who’d skinned his knee.This is just a little boo-boo, her tone said.It will stop hurting in a minute.
He laughed without any humor whatsoever. “That’s rich. You know you can’t predict the future, right, Brooke? Maybe things will work out, or maybe they won’t. But being scared of failure isn’t a reason not to try.”
It was, actually. It was the best reason there was.
“I can predictthisfuture,” she shot back, “and I’m telling you, this thing?” She waved her hand to encompass the empty space between them. “Would most definitelynotwork out.”
“So that’s a no, then. You don’t want to be with me.” His voice was so devoid of feeling it sent a shiver through her body.
