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"You think?" He winks.
"You know." I scoff. "Don't act like you don't."
"Maybe I just wanna impress you."
"Well, I mean you don't have to impress me, you already got me," I laugh.
"That doesn't mean I have to stop trying, especially if I want to keep you. I can lose you just as easily as I got you."
I roll my eyes playfully. "You sound like you've been reading some sort of magazine and you're taking tips from it."
"Maybe I have. I've never been in a serious relationship before. I’ve had them, but of course, not like this. So, I'm trying to get it all right." He swallows roughly, eyes on mine.
"You don't have to get it all right. I've never been in a serious relationship before either. I won't know if it's wrong, I'll just know how it makes me feel."
He grabs my hand, rolling it over so that our palms meet. "If it ever makes you feel bad, or uncomfortable, all you have to do is let me know. I'm all in for this. Ready to give you all of me, because I don't know any other way to be. It's how my dad taught me. He loves and cares with every single part of who he is, and so do I."
Reaching out, I cup his cheek with my free palm. Turning it in, I feel the rasp of his scratchy skin. "I don't want you to be any different than who you are, Abel. You've shown me a piece of myself I never knew was there. I've taken life so seriously up to this point since college, that I didn't even know how to relax and let life play out. I was scared to let it go. It's why I've had such rigid control over everything, but you've shown me that I can let some of that go. Thank you."
He goes onto his knees, and then leans up into me. He lets go of my hand, cupping his palms around my neck. Our eyes meet, and I see the rest of my life there, every bit of love I've always been searching for with my family. My heart pounds in my chest as I realize this is what I've been killing myself to get with them. I got the love, acceptance, and family, all from him. I don't have to do anything special. He gives it to me, no questions asked. The pressure against my neck pulls me toward him like a magnet. It's as if we're in slow-motion as we approach one another. It's not the quick press of passion we've been so used to. Instead, it's like a slow roll of each other's bodies as we melt into one another. Our lips meet, tongues tangle, and my fingers grab onto his shirt, holding him tightly to my body.
I groan deep in my throat before he pulls away. "I love you," I whisper, afraid if I say it too loudly it might jinx it.
"You have every piece of my heart, Kara. I didn't expect it when I met you, but you caught me, and it's like you refuse to let go."
I laugh as I put my forehead against his. "I do refuse to let go. Someone else might snatch you up, and then where would I be?"
"Trust me, nobody else has got what I want."
I want to believe him with everything I have. The old me would question it all, but the one who's opening herself up to whatever I might be blessed with is willing to just let it be. "Oh, they would Abel. But right now, I think you should show me this train trestle, or we may not get out of this apartment."
He blows out a breath. "You might be right about that. Let's go."
* * *
An hour later we're pulling up to what's supposed to be the trail head. "I'm excited to show you this."
"I'm so excited to see it. I've heard all about how cool it is. When I told Rachelle I was going, she went into this whole story about how her first boyfriend took her up there, and convinced her to lose her virginity." I roll my eyes, laughing.
"Well at least your virtue is safe with me." His voice is deadpan. "Already defiled you more than once, can't do it for the first time again."
I roll my lips together, trying to suppress the smile. One of my favorite things about him is when he gets dirty in public. Even if it's still just us together. Most people who look at him, see him as this quiet guy who doesn't make waves either way. He doesn't seem to push people toward or away from things. They tend to think he's just a go-with-the-flow kind of guy, and sometimes he is. But not always. Not when I need him to be the man who tells me what to do. "You can do it whenever you want to, though." I tuck my hand in the back of his jeans, as we traipse through the woods.
About an hour later, we arrive to our destination. "It's right up here. There used to be a ladder, but at some point, a group of kids built stairs, and they've been used for the last few years. It should be a lot safer, that ladder was sketchy."
"How many girls have you brought up here?" I ask as we start going up the stairs.
"No one, believe it or not. I came up here with groups, but I've never brought a girl one-on-one, until you."
I stop, looking at him wide-eyed. "Are you serious? You're not saying that to get on my good side?"
"When have I ever said something just to get on your good side? It would've made things much easier had I done that from the beginning. I've never lied to you, Kara. Never."
"I know, and I appreciate it." Once we get up to the top of the train trestle, he helps me onto the tracks. "Do trains still use this?" I ask, my breath blowing out in a cloud of white smoke.
"No, they shut the tracks off when we were in high school. Someone from a rival school got killed because they were out here when they shouldn't have been. There were a bunch of calls to action after that, and they basically knew that kids, or even adults, weren't going to stop coming up here. It's a rite of passage, and for many, it's a good omen for their relationship."
This is all so interesting to me. "What's the omen?"
