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Opening up my video editor, I take a deep breath. I love my YouTube channel. It’s fun to talk about everything I like, or to review movies and comics. But I’ve also used it just to connect with people. I’ve talked about the effects of bullying and the fact that my mom died when I was little. I always incorporate whatever I’m talking about back into the channel because I’m sure people don’t just want to hear a girl crying about things on the internet. So, I compare it to stories I’ve read or movies and shows I’ve seen. I talk about the parallels and how they’ve helped me. Looking through my pictures, I’m suddenly hit with the urge to talk about comic book couples.
“Hey, guys.” I wave to the camera, letting out another sniff. “This week has been a little bit of a rough one, so today I’m talking about the complexities of those couples we read about and see on the big screen. Let’s start with Daredevil and Elektra.”
For the next fifteen minutes, I go over Matt Murdoch and Elektra Natchios and other couples people may have read about in comics or seen in movies. I go over Bruce Banner and Betty Ross. I go off on a tangent as I get to Scott Summers and Jean Grey because then I’m reminded of Cyclops other relationship with Emma Frost.
“And I mean, who does that,” I scoff at the camera. “Who has a mental affair with someone else? Crazy.”
Letting out a sigh, I get to the last couple I’m thinking about. The one that inspired this whole video session to begin with.
“And finally, we have Tony Stark and Pepper Pots, the movie versions.” I let out a sigh and stare at the camera for a moment. “They’d be great together, right? I mean, they were great together. But what does ol’ shell head do, when we catch up with him in Civil War? He’s not with Pepper.” I let out an annoyed grunt, feeling anger start to build up. “I get it, okay? I get you don’t want to stop what you’re doing. You’ve got this great life. You’re the man, literally.” I bite my lip, realizing I’m getting a little too worked up. “Uh, I mean, he’s Iron Man. He runs the Avengers. But it was all on him.” I deepen my voice, re-enacting the line from the movie. “And then and then and then I never stopped. Because the truth is I don’t want to stop. Yeah, you didn’t want to stop. You. She could’ve been his, but he’s the one making the choice. Ugh!”
I take another deep breath and just stare at the camera, realizing I better end this video before I get too worked up. “Sorry. As I said, it’s been a tough week. Anyways, yeah, I guess that’s it for today. I guess being a couple is hard.” I give an embarrassed chuckle. “Not that I would know, but still. I guess it takes work on both sides. There needs to be a give and take. May we all find our Alana or Marko out there someday and have a love Saga of our lives. Or maybe, our Black Bolt, who’s totally awesome even though he never whispers a thing.” I give a knowing wink to the camera and then turn it off.
I do a quick edit on the video, nothing major, but take out some of the pauses to make it presentable and upload it. Falling back on my bed, I grab my phone and stare at the few text messages I’ve exchanged with Matt. A small piece of me wants to text him, just so he doesn’t think I hate him. Because I don’t. I just wish he felt as comfortable about things as I do.
