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Margot is acting weird, and I’m trying to figure out if it’s just because we’re around Rae and Matt.
Or if something is wrong.
She’ll barely look at me, and it’s making me want to grab her face and kiss her right here. She gets stuck in her head, and she shuts down. I hate seeing her withdraw in on herself.
“I’m starving,” Rae says as she closes her notebook.
Matt looks between Margot and me. “Do you guys want to get something to eat?”
Margot shakes her head, still staring at her laptop screen. “No thanks. I have leftover Chipotle.”
He looks at me.
“I ate with the band.” It’s a lie, but if I want to figure out what’s going on with this girl, I need the two of them to leave.
Matt shrugs and gets to his feet, stretching his arms overhead. “Fair enough.” He turns to Rae. “Where do you want to go?”
She raises an eyebrow at him. “Where do I want to go? Or where do I think we’d both enjoy?”
Matt rolls his eyes. “We can go to Chili’s.”
Rae smiles up at him and gathers her things. “I don’t get why you don’t like it. It’s great, and it’s cheap.”
“It’s cheap, but I wouldn’t say it’s great.” The two of them say a quick goodbye before heading to the elevator.
I watch their backs until the metal doors close behind them and then look back at Margot, giving her my full attention. “What’s up?”
She lifts her gaze, but only for a moment. “Nothing.”
I stare at her, waiting for the truth. She chews the cap on her pen as she focuses on her screen. She’s anxious.
It takes longer than I want it to, but eventually she glances at me again. When she sees I’m still looking at her, she says, “I hear you’re dropping out after the semester ends.”
I nod, swallowing hard. By the way she’s looking at me now, I know I should have told her at my gig. There’s a level of hurt behind her eyes, and I hate knowing I’m the one who put it there. I didn’t tell her because I thought she wouldn’t care, but as I look at her now, I realize I wasn’t afraid she wouldn’t care.
I was afraid she would.
Because if she asked me to stay, I think I might.
“You’re mad,” I say, studying her.
This makes her lift her head to look at me, and for the first time today, she looks a little more like herself. “I’m not mad at you.” She stares at me for a long moment, and I’m on the edge of my seat, waiting for her to say more.
Part of me wishes I could dismiss whatever she’s feeling right now, but I can’t. Maybe it’s because I want to hear her say I mean something to her.
Or maybe it’s because she means something to me.
She wasn’t supposed to. I thought this was something fleeting. But as I look at her, waiting to unlock the door she keeps her truth hidden behind, I can’t help feeling like I’ll be thinking about Margot for a very long time.
Finally, her shoulders drop in defeat. “I’m not. I think it’s great you’re following your dreams.”
“But?”
Her eyes are back to being vulnerable again, and her lips part even though no words come out.
The air shifts between us, and I swear I can feel everything she wants to say but isn’t. I know she would want this to turn into something if I wasn’t leaving. I know she feels something for me. It was written all over her face this weekend at the gig. I want that Margot back—the one who wasn’t hiding.
