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Chapter 22
Zander
It was the waiting that truly was the life or death part of the hospital scene, Zander realized as he sat on the stiff chair, another bad cup of hospital coffee on his hands. The hours ticked by at a speed unrecognizable, the minutes dragging into hours that felt like years. It was a true time warp.
It didn’t help that he no longer had a phone to pass his time with. In all of the craziness, he’d managed to lose the thing on the first night. He didn’t feel like going out to get a new one, sure it would eventually show up. Maybe it was a blessing in disguise because scrolling through everyone’s happy social media accounts probably wouldn’t help his psyche any, not when his own world was falling apart. Besides, everyone who would call him or need to talk to him was here. Rachel had made it clear she was done with him, so there was no concern she would call. He hadn’t heard from her since they’d said their goodbyes, a fact that still stung.
It was exhausting, though. It sucked any life left in Zander right out. It didn’t help they were still waiting to hear what the ultimate result would be of this ordeal. They didn’t have the promise of a happy ending yet.
Ian had come out of the first surgery in stable condition, but the doctors reminded Anne over and over he wasn’t out of the woods yet. There were all sorts of huge medical terms Zander didn’t even know being tossed around as if they were salad choices at the local café. There were no easy answers, and there were no quick solutions when it came to a situation like this. It didn’t make it any easier on anyone, especially Anne.
He’d gotten to see his brother on and off over the past few days. Ian wasn’t responsive, and no one even knew if he knew they were there. But Zander didn’t waste any time talking to him, teasing him, and even apologizing for not being there enough. That trip to Germany suddenly didn’t seem like such an imposition or an impossibility in the scheme of things. Zander wished he’d said yes instead of saying no.
He was a yes-guy, he was—except with the important stuff, it seemed. This accident, this moment, was really putting things in perspective, though.
He’d been staying at a nearby hotel for the past few days, although sleep was hard to come by. He spent little time in his hotel room, too afraid of missing something and knowing Anne wasn’t leaving Ian’s side. He needed to be here with her, for Ian. It was the least he could do. He needed to be here for his parents, too, who weren’t holding up much better.
“You know, honey, you’ve been so strong through all this. Who is holding you together? You need to lean on someone, too,” a voice said to him, taking a seat beside him. Zander’s parents were at the hotel showering, and Anne was in with Ian. Zander sat alone in the empty waiting room, staring at the mint green wall he’d come to hate.
He turned to see who the voice was coming from. The elderly lady sat beside him, her sunshine yellow dress brightening up the room. He’d seen her on and off in the room since yesterday but, true to typical waiting room etiquette, hadn’t wanted to butt in. They’d observed each other from afar, giving each other distance.
“I’m fine,” Zander replied, grinning at the woman.
“I’ve watched you these past couple of days trying to hold it together, being the rock for all those people with you. But you can’t do it alone. No one does it all alone, you know?”
She looked at him in a way that told her she had wisdom oozing from every one of her pores. She had life experience and knowledge, and even just the breathy way she talked told Zander he should pay attention.
“Are you doing okay?” he asked because it seemed okay to talk to her about it.
She shrugged. “Albert’s touch and go. So I don’t know. He’s in surgery right now. I just have to keep the faith. We’ve been through a lot over the years. I keep telling myself we can get through this, too.”
“Who is Albert?”
“My husband,” she said, and he couldn’t help but notice how her face lit up. She radiated emotion when she said his name. “We’ve been married sixty-two years. Can you believe it? I sure as heck can’t. Oh, Albert.”
Zander reached over and held her hand, squeezing it. She smiled at him, nodding appreciatively. “It’s been a long road. A very, very long road. There were a lot of times we both thought about quitting. I wasn’t an easy catch, you know? I’m ashamed to admit I played a bit of hard to get in my day. Didn’t want to fall in love. I didn’t want to settle into a boring life. I wanted to be an adventurer, you know? I had visions of being a flight attendant and traveling the whole world. But there he was, trying to put a ring on my finger and get me to be his.”
Zander smiled. “What happened? How did he change your mind?”
She grinned. “He didn’t. He ended up getting his pilot’s license to convince me we could make it work, that we could see the world together. And finally, he wore me down. I wouldn’t admit this to him, but honestly, it was a done deal as soon as I saw him walk into that café. I was his, and I knew it, even if I wouldn’t admit it. Still, he made it easy on me. He made me see he was willing to work for it, willing to take my heart into consideration. I think that’s all we all want, you know? To know someone is willing to meet you halfway, to put the work in. We all just want to know we’re worth that for someone.”
Zander took in the words, thinking about how it was oddly serendipitous that this woman would be here saying the exact things he couldn’t articulate or couldn’t recognize. This stranger, this sweet old lady was saying exactly what he’d been needing to hear all along.
“I’ll be hoping for the best for Albert,” Zander said honestly, squeezing her hand again. “I’m Zander, by the way.”
“And I’m Elyse. Nice to talk to you. Do you have someone back home? A girlfriend or a wife?”
“No. It’s just me.”
She nodded. “That’s what I thought. I got the sense from you that you were a bit of a loner. Nothing wrong with that. There’s strength in that. But there’s also a lot of loneliness, you know? Don’t be afraid to give your heart to someone. Giving up mine was the best thing I ever did, and I’m saying that as an old woman who knows a thing or two about it.”
“Thanks,” Zander said, the wheels rotating in his head, knowing what he needed to do.
It wasn’t too late for them. He was sure of it. And it wasn’t impossible. Elyse was right. He just needed to show her he would meet her halfway.
And he knew exactly how he was going to do that.
“Mind if we just sit here for a bit together?” Elyse asked, leaning on Zander’s shoulder.
“Not at all,” he replied.
For the next few hours, they sat in silence, staring at a mint green wall with a cold cup of coffee in Zander’s hand. They sat as two strangers who had connected on a powerful level, a kind of connection in which no words were needed to share what they’d shared.
And, in a weird way, Zander realized Ian’s accident had opened up so many truths and feelings in Zander. It was the only silver lining from a situation he wouldn’t wish on anyone.
