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And a doozy it turned out to be when he really got into it. I sat back against my headboard and just listened, my jaw slacked. Bru got kicked out of school?
And for… fighting?
The Bru I knew once upon a time wouldn’t even look at someone funny. Let alone fight them. But then again, there had been that fight at the frat party. He’d punched that guy within an inch of his life, and that’d been shocking. Alarming. I’d been scared, but not for myself. It’d just been so out of character for him.
“How did your parents react to everything?” I asked, finding an appropriate place in the conversation to speak. I hadn’t wanted to interrupt him. I definitely realized that lately a lot of our friendship had been about me.
“Well, they were shocked. Especially when they realized why I was fighting. There was an incident I had in high school surrounding violence. It wasn’t good, and I still hadn’t dealt with it.”
I had no idea. “Bru… wow. I mean, wow. I didn’t know.”
“Surprised you’re not the only one with secrets?” The familiar smile I’d come to know and love returned to his voice, which made me smile. “You don’t need to feel guilty or ashamed for things you’re going through. I’m learning that myself. I started seeing someone here in Maywood Heights, a therapist. It’s new, but it’s already helping just talking about stuff. I trust him and my family does. It just feels good to talk.”
I knew all about talking. Back when I was in the rough of everything surrounding my dad, I’d seen a cocktail of therapists. I hadn’t really had my turnaround until I’d gone to rehab, though. That was how bad things had gotten. I’d gotten really into the party scene and things had gotten dark.
They weren’t as dark now, but I was still going through things. Clearly. “I’m glad you’re talking to someone. So, you’re taking a break from school, then?”
“Yeah, until I work some stuff out. But hey, you never know. You may eventually see me at Pembroke. I mean, my friends and family go there, so you never know.”
That’d be nice to see him. It’d be more than nice.
The line went silent, and in that silence, I worried. I wasn’t sure what he was going to say, and I didn’t want to field any questions about certain topics. There weren’t many, but there were some.
“Did he talk to you?” he asked, and my stomach launched into my throat.
Did. He. Talk. To. You.
And there it was. Basically, it was confirmation that I’d probably been discussed at some point, and I wasn’t surprised.
They were brothers.
Even still, these were waters I couldn’t wade into. I couldn’t tread the fucking water without drowning. I swallowed. “Bru, I don’t want to talk to him, and you know why.”
He should understand why. He was there just like everyone else that day.
That day…
Again, I couldn’t tread the water and didn’t want to. No.
More of that silence filled the line, and that reminded me of Sloane. She hadn’t had much to say because there really wasn’t anything to say. “Fawn, I get it, and I won’t ask you any more about it. I just want you to be okay. I want him to be okay too.”
Him.
“I care about you both. Love you both.” He sighed. “So, yeah. Anyway, tell me about your semester. I’d love to hear about it. I’m going stir-crazy being here at the house.”
I could do that topic, and it was certainly easier. There was only one way for me to be okay, and it wasn’t talking about Wolf Mallick.
It was making myself believe he and what we had never existed.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
Fawn
I made myself sick. I literally woke up with a fever, chills, and my entire body aching. As it turned out, I had some bug that was going around. It hit me like a son of a bitch, and I could barely leave my bed.
I did this to myself.
I knew I had. My immune system just couldn’t handle all the stress I was carrying in my body. Of course, that was my own theory.
