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She shifts and looks uncomfortable suddenly. Her eyes are cast down to her dessert, her shoulders drawn in, and she appears to look smaller in her seat. “I don’t know.”
Realization hits me like a punch to the gut. As long as I’ve known Ellie, her entire focus has been on staying afloat and providing a stable life for her son. I rack my brain, trying to come up with a single instance where she took time away from work and went somewhere to relax and vacation with Brody, but I come up empty.
“Have you ever been on a vacation, El?” I find myself asking hesitantly. The last thing I want to do is make her feel more uncomfortable than I can tell she already is.
She lifts her slender shoulders and stirs her melting ice cream in the bowl. “When I was a kid, my parents would go to a church retreat every year, and I went with them. Though, not exactly my idea of a vacation,” she says, a sad smile on her lips. “Once when I was seven or eight, we went to the Dells for an extended weekend. We rented a room in a big cabin resort place. I remember wanting to go to the nearby water park, but my parents said no. Instead, we swam in the lake behind the resort. It was fun, but I was so jealous of the kids talking about the water park.” Suddenly, she looks up at me with wide, horrified eyes. “Do you think Brody is upset at me for not taking him to a water park? We’ve never been.”
I’m moving before I realize I’m out of my chair. Dropping to my knees in front of her, I gently turn her to face me. “No, I don’t think he’s upset.”
Suddenly, tears spring from her eyes and slide down her cheeks. “But…I’ve never taken him anywhere, TD. Not once. He’s never had a vacation.”
“He’s had something better than vacations, El,” I insist, taking her hands in my right palm and swiping at those damn tears with my left thumb. “He’s had experiences. You made sure he has a season pass every year to the public pool. He’s been able to attend camps out at Bluff Preserves as well as for any sport he’s ever wanted. You’ve made trips to the county fair, year after year, making sure he always had a wristband to ride all the rides. You’ve done day trips to amusement parks and traveled around the area exploring, and you’ve spent more time with him one-on-one, creating more memories than most kids will ever get. Believe me when I tell you, Brody is not mad at you for not taking him on some big, expensive trip somewhere. He had everything he ever wanted here, with you.”
The look in her eyes doesn’t exactly tell me she believes me, but that’s okay. I understand what she’s saying. Most kids would want to go to Florida or California or somewhere far away, but knowing Brody as well as I do, I know he’s happy as long as she’s happy. He’s incredibly smart. He’s known they can’t afford the fancy trips some of his friends have taken every year, but he never lets it bother him—at least not that I’ve seen—and he makes the most out of the smaller things he gets to do locally.
She sighs dramatically and gives me a sad smile. “I just wish…I just wish things had been a little different for us. Easier,” she confesses.
“Me too,” I reply honestly. Watching her work herself to the point of exhaustion has always been a hard pill for me to swallow, but knowing she puts Brody first in every decision she makes helps ease the hurt it causes me.
I want to give her everything.
I want to share the load.
Not take care of it all completely, because that’s not what she wants or needs, but to help her.
And Brody.
Our eyes hold for several seconds, and so much happens in that short amount of time. I see her worries, her struggles, and her celebrations flash through those beautiful eyes of hers. I see composure, fortitude, and if I’m not mistaken, desire. It’s there, reflecting in those stunning green pools, and growing with every passing second.
Her hands turn, her slender fingers sliding between mine as my free hand moves to cup her jaw. I’ve always known her skin to be soft and warm, but having it against my palm right this moment is a special kind of torture. All I want is to move my hand, to see if the rest of her body is as perfect, and it doesn’t help when she angles her chin, as if seeking out my hand farther. The slight movement also brings her mouth just a bit closer. My eyes zero in on her lips, and the moment her tongue slips out, wetting them, I almost groan.
Because all I can think about doing right now…is kissing her.
Her pink lips fall open slightly, her warm breath tickling my chin. I lean forward, my mouth so fucking close to hers, it’s killing me not to just take the kiss. When her eyes drift closed, I’m a goner. My brain tries to tell me not to do it, but my heart is screaming at me to kiss her, kiss her!
What’s a guy who has been pining after one of his closest friends for years to do?
My fingers itch, my skin feels hot beneath my clothes, and my mouth is suddenly so dry, my throat is like a desert, but that doesn’t stop my desire for Ellie. It consumes me, burning through my veins like an out-of-control wildfire.
I lean in just enough to touch her lips with my own. Her lips part, and my tongue delves inside, sliding across hers hesitantly, yet possessively. The first taste of her sends my senses into overdrive, and I realize my mistake immediately.
I never want to stop kissing her.
The softest mewl sound fills the room as she wraps her arms around my shoulders and presses her chest to mine. The tips of her fingers tease the nape of my neck, dancing along the top of my spine and tangling with the locks I’ve meant to get cut this week but haven’t found the time. Feeling her delicate fingers sliding along my scalp makes me suddenly reconsider my decision for that haircut.
Her mouth is pure heaven. Sweet and ripe, like a delicious strawberry on a hot summer day. Her hesitancy is replaced quickly by desire, as she rocks her body against mine. My cock is so hard, it’s trying to claw its way out of my jeans to get to her. I’ve fantasized about this moment, this kiss, for so long, it’s hard to believe it’s actually happening.
The only way to describe this is the best kiss I’ve ever had.
Just when I’m about to throw her over my shoulder and cart her off to the nearest bedroom, the shutting of a door nearby triggers something in the back of my brain. The sound of heavy feet on stairs is the next to register, and I realize quickly we’re only a couple of seconds away from not being alone anymore.
I release my hold and pull back, opening my eyes and staring into her wide, shocked ones. I’m able to stand rapidly, my mind spinning—either from the fast movement or the kiss, I’m not sure which. Taking a step back, I turn to hide my groin as the kitchen door opens and Brody steps inside.
He doesn’t seem surprised to see me here, but the moment his eyes find his mom, a flash of worry crosses his features. “Everything okay?”
“Yes!” Ellie bellows.
I almost smile.
