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“I’m fine.” I lie. I’m anything but fine. There’s a piece of my heart missing that went with Savanna and I don’t know how to handle it right now. “Can we go now?” I need to finish this shift so thatI can go to the Sheriff’s office and request a week off. Then I’m going to get started on my plan. Until that happens, I need to focus on the job at hand.
When I walk through my front door, I’m more than ready to sleep the next few days away, but I’ve got other things to do – like win Savanna back.
I make my way into my master room and head straight for the closet, reaching high up onto the top shelf and grabbing the worn out box tucked in the corner. I’ve spent plenty of time with this box over the years, so much so that it's damn near falling apart in certain areas while other parts are discolored. Everything I’ve ever wanted to say to Savanna is in this box. There’s even a stack of envelopes addressed to her that I never sent.
I take a deep breath and climb onto the bed, sorting through each of the envelopes slowly and reading the dates. Seven years of letters. Tomorrow I’ll be taking these with me in an attempt to win her over, hoping they will be enough for the second chance I’ve been begging her for.
Everything will be out in the open.
The knock on my door forces me up from my place on the bed and I head to the front door to see who can possibly be here right now. I roll my eyes when I swing the door open to find Gage smirking at me on the other side. “Need something?”
Gage walks inside and clicks his tongue to the roof of his mouth while stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “You’re going to tell me what the hell has been going on with you since lunchtime today.”
I should’ve known he would manage to find his way here and badger me about the issue at hand – my best friend doesn’t know how to let shit go. Ever. “Sure, come inside, make yourself at home.”
He chuckles and flashes me a wink over his shoulder. “Don’t mind if I do.” I follow him into the living room and stand in the center while he flops onto the couch. “So, talk to me, man. What’s going on?”
If I don’t give him something, he’ll only keep asking me until I come clean about it all. I sigh and run a hand through my hair. “Savanna.”
He nods. “What about her?”
“She left town yesterday morning.”
“Okay… why is that a bad thing?”
“Because,” I mumble. “She left without saying anything to me, Gage. Now she’s not responding to my calls or texts and I’m not sure what to make of it.”
Gage shrugs and leans forward. “Well, what are you going to do about it?”
“I’m going to get her back, obviously.”
Now that I’ve gotten another taste of her, there’s no way I’m letting her go as easily as I once did. All I’ve been able to think about is what my life would be like with her by my side and it’s about time I gave it my best shot.
I’m not saying it will be a walk in the park – I’m certain she will fight me on it – but we’re worth fighting for. If she asks me to give her time, I’ll give her whatever she needs. I’ve waited seven years to be with her, what’s a little more time?
“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Gage asks, his eyebrows pulled tightly together. “There’s a reason she didn’t call you, man, and I’d hate to see you get hurt.”
I sigh. “That’s the thing though, Gage. The longer she’s out there and I’m here, I’ll always be hurting. I don’t want to be here without her.”
He nods. “As long as you know what you’re doing.”
I’ll admit, it’s not the perfect plan, but I have a pretty decent idea of what I’m going to do and I can’t wait to see what her response to it is. Will she jump in my arms and pepper me with kisses? That’s the reaction I’m hoping for, but I know it’s a long shot to think that all these letters will be enough to gain her forgiveness and love.
If she’ll let me, I’ll prove for the rest of our lives how much I love and adore her. I’ll show her every single day how much she means to me and bring a smile onto her face that she deserves to have on a daily basis. There’s nothing I won’t do for her.
Even if that means walking away. As long as she is happy, that’s all that matters to me.
For now though, I’m going to try like hell to keep her in my life. To make her mine.
Chapter Twenty-One
Savanna
It’s been weeks since I was home and there’s always a sadness inside of me that won’t go away. Dawson has done nothing but call and text me, especially after finding out I was gone, and I haven’t been able to bring myself to respond. If I respond, then I’ll be forced to rethink my decision to come back.
This is the life I created when the one I wanted wasn’t possible. The idea of not having it anymore terrifies me.
A loud knock sounds on my door, forcing a groan from my mouth as I lift from my bed. This is where I’ve been spending most of my time when I’m not working – which is evident by all the trash scattered along the nightstand and next to the bed. I guess I should probably get some cleaning done at some point.
