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“No, he wasn’t a saint but you loved him. Hell so did I. And what he had with her was his shit. You need to figure out yours before it’s too late. I’m not saying you’re wrong for wanting her. I’m saying you’re wrong for not giving her all the facts.”
Again, she was right and he wouldn’t argue. His mess, not hers, and this was something War had to fix. He just wasn’t sure how.
NINE
“It’s cute in there. Got a little vibe and everything. Your boss is nice too. Maybe I need to get a part-time job there. I could use the money.”
“You have a good job, Conner. You shouldn’t need money but if you do…”
“Don’t say you’ll help because you won’t.”
“I will always help but I’m not going to cover your bills to make that man more of a deadbeat. He needs to step up. He needs to be a man.”
“Just forget I said anything. I was joking anyway.”
Cali exhaled a sigh. Arguing with Conner about her man was pointless. Until Conner was ready to see him for who he truly was, a lazy abusive asshole, then there wasn’t much she could do but be there for when Conner finally opened her eyes.
“You weren’t joking but I’ll let it go. Just know that when you’re truly ready, I’m here. You can stay with me until you figure something out.”
“Your place is nice but it’s small.”
“And peaceful. No assholes allowed,” Cali asserted with a firm look.
“Anyway…” Conner plucked a fry from her sister's plate. “What’s going on with you and your new man? You gonna see him today?”
Cali shook her head and smiled, thinking about War. She hadn’t seen him since his pop-up visit at the bookstore where his jealousy had him chasing away another man and dropping two hundred dollars on books. Cali loved how he was genuinely interested in the titles he selected and schooled her on a few she should check out.
War was hood but smart. His intelligence was non-traditional and she assumed it was how he managed to survive so long in the streets and make the transition to legitimate business owner. He had told her he recently stepped away from the drug game and she had no reason not to believe him. He had obviously been planning the transition for years by building legitimate businesses to bring in legal money. She appreciated that he was honest about his past but appreciated even more that it was his past.
The street life was what had gotten Merritt caught up. The article she read online mentioned a young Black male shot and killed in what was presumed to be a drug related incident. She didn’t know his friends or family to get details on what truly happened. The day of his funeral she was too distraught to involve herself with those that attended and they didn’t know her. Laying him to rest wasn’t the time or place to make introductions.
She watched from afar and left before the services were over, slipping into her car and driving to Carvers teary eyed, needing whatever connection she could have. Being in the apartment where they spent time was too overwhelming so she sat at Carvers for hours, staring blankly at the walls, jumping every time someone entered, praying it would be Merritt. He never showed, he couldn’t. He was gone. That night after she made it home, Conner showed up and forced her to eat and binge watch some of their favorite movies. Each day was a struggle but things slowly became bearable.
“He said he had family stuff this weekend. But that he would give me a call.”
“Family stuff.” Conner wrinkled her nose across the table from her sister. “Like what?”
“I don’t know. Didn’t ask.”
“You should have.”
“Why? We’re not like that.”
“He’s sticking his dick and tongue in your pussy, Cali. Y’all are like that whether you want to accept the truth or not, you’re into a man who might be keeping secrets. Don’t do the same thing you did with Merritt.”
“Which is?” Cali’s posture straightened as she glared at her sister.
“Nothing,” Conner mumbled but Cali pressed for her truth.
“Say what’s on your mind, Conner.”
“I’m just saying, you didn’t know shit about him. You never met his family or friends. He never took you around the block to see what that part of his life was like. I don’t know. I’m just saying…”
“I thought you liked Merritt.”
“I did like Merritt. A lot, but I love you, Cali. I won't say he wasn’t good to you because he was. Hell, he’s still good to you but let's be honest. He was a dope boy. Nigga had bank. How many other women was he good to? You could have been one of many. Did you ever ask or did you just not care?”
Cali cringed with the truth. She hadn’t cared. She and Merritt existed in their own world and it was so good and intense that she didn’t want to know what existed beyond their private bubble. Maybe that was stupid and maybe she should have pushed harder but she hadn’t.
