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Matt turned to me, fire blazed in his eyes. "What are you doing? Commitment isn't your thing."
“A guy can change,” I barked back. His mistrust, although not unexpected, was a sharp stab right in the gut.
“Sure, but I know you, man. Promise me you'll break it off before you get bored,” Matt said. “Becca is fiery and independent, but she's delicate and just had her heart broken. I don't want to see her hurt again.”
Damn. Those words hurt, but there was truth in them. Becca had stormed into my life and made me rethink the whole bachelor life—but what if Matt was right? The longest relationship I'd ever had was six months long. My stomach sizzled at the thought of breaking Becca's heart.
“Alright,” I said, my voice barely audible. “I'll think about it.”
“Thank you. Guess I can't ask more than that.” Matt said, clapping me on the back.
We walked back to the truck. After a short drive, I parked next to Matt's car in Becca's parking lot. I walked around to the back of the vehicle. "You going to come up?"
“No," Matt sighed. “I think you and my sister need to talk before you head back to Flagstaff. Tell her I'll call her tomorrow.”
I nodded and strolled toward Becca's apartment. Just thinking about breaking things off crushed my heart. But was that really what I wanted? Wasn't that the safe option? Matt might be my best friend, but that didn't mean he was right about this. That was the old me. Maybe Matt knows me better than I know myself. Maybe I'm not capable of love. Maybe it's better to slow things down now before I make them worse.
Rebecca opened the door before I could even knock, her eyes wide with worry. “Connor, are you alright? What happened?”
“Everything's under control.” I forced a reassuring smile, my fingers aching to reach out to her. “We caught The Hunter.”
“Thank God,” she breathed, relief flooding her face. In that moment, she looked more beautiful than ever, and it took every ounce of strength I had not to pull her into my arms. “And Matt?”
“He's fine,” I said heading off the fear in her voice.
“Oh good,” she said and asked me to come inside.
“Rebecca, there's something I need to say,” I began, my voice cracking under the pressure of my emotions.
“What is it?” Her face paled.
God, I was such a jerk.
“Rebecca, I care about you a lot, but,” I choked out, hating the anguish that flashed across her face. “I think we need to slow things down a little bit.”
“Slow things down?” she repeated, darkness clouded her eyes as she crossed her arms. “Like a break or like I have to go back to Flagstaff and I’ll see you when I see you?”
“No. I don’t know. Just let’s take things. . .slow now that we’re out of our weekend bubble.” My heart splintered into a thousand pieces.
“Yeah, ok,” she said, but her tone was anything but fine.
Fuck. This wasn’t the way I’d imagined things going. “I have to go pick up Dan at the station and fill out a report before heading back up to Flagstaff. Can I call you later?”
She nodded but didn't say a word. She closed the door with a snap. The gravity of my decision weighed heavily on my soul. Had I truly made the right choice? Or had I just doomed myself to a lifetime of loneliness and regret?
“Damn it,” I muttered under my breath, choking back the sting of tears. What if there was no coming back from this?
15
Rebecca
Saturday morning, the sun's rays broke through the curtains, taunting me as I groggily opened my eyes. My mind was a whirlwind of confusion and frustration, all thanks to Connor and that goddamn conversation we’d had a few nights ago about “slowing things down.”
I rolled over in bed as anger and hurt mixed in my heart. Was he worth this headache, or would it be better for both of us if we just ended this mess right now? Why did relationships have to be so fucking complicated?
I reluctantly climbed out of bed and dragged myself to the bathroom. I stared at my reflection in the mirror, willing my brain to come up with some sort of answer to this situation. But of course, my reflection only stared back at me, unhelpful as ever.
My phone buzzed on the counter, jolting me from my thoughts. It was a text message from Matt: Hey, Scooter, can we meet for lunch today?
