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“Everything is fine.”
“I made us some food,” I said excited.
“Then let’s go and feast.”
-
The drive back to the city was something I hated, I wished we had more time at the cabin, but Antonio promised we would go back soon and for longer. For some reason, the place gave me peace and solidarity and a chance to be with my man without any interruptions.
“Can I ask you something?” I asked turning my body to face him as he drove.
“Of course.”
“Can I go to my mamma’s grave?”
He glanced at me. “Of course, you can.”
“Can we go there before heading home.”
“If that is what you want.”
“It is,” I said excited. I hadn’t been to my mamma’s grave in years as…well whatever you called him stopped me. He wouldn’t allow me out the house for anything and if I did Ricco was by my side like a bad smell.
The drive took hours, I didn’t realize how far the cabin had been to the city. Then I hadn’t been this far out since mamma and Paul were taken away.
Asleep, as Antonio drove. There was something about being in a car that knocked me out.
“Princess, princess,” I heard and soon started to wake, I opened my eyes and looked around my surroundings. I shot forward to see we were in the graveyard and close to where my mamma’s grave was. Antonio passed me a bouquet of flowers, roses, in pink which were her favourite.
“How did you know they were her favourite?” I asked, taking them from him.
“I have my sources. Now go and see her,” he smiled.
Opening the car door and made my way to where I needed to be, I could already feel her presence her love her sweet perfume that she always wore. I glanced across the see Carlo, Luigi and Cecco not far away, clearly there was the possibility of some concern.
Walking to my mamma’s grave and glanced over my shoulder to see Antonio staying by the car, pleased he respected this moment.
Each step was like a heartbeat. Tears welled in my eyes, I had to stay strong, I had to keep my wits about me. I stepped ever closer and saw the gravestone I picked. I hadn’t seen it here as the day of her funeral nothing was in place but a pile of mud.
I stopped and heaved my breath and teared released from the corners of my eyes. This was what I had wanted for years to be close to the one person who I missed with all my heart.
I swallowed and stepped closer to treading the grass down. I glanced back at Antonio and his men to see them a fair distance from me. I arrived at her grave and in that moment, I dropped to my knees. Tears streamed down my cheeks as I sobbed my heart out wishing I could see her once again, wishing to have those last moments. The last time I saw or spoke to her I hated the fact he never allowed me to go with her, and then it all made sense Malinco had set up her ambush and death. The bastard.
I sat on my knees for a while, picturing her pretty face, her smile the way she used to give me that eye when I did or said something wrong. She was my world and I missed her deeply.
I placed the flowers down in front of her gravestone.
HERE LAYS A DAUGHTER, WIFE, AND MOTHER.
LOUISA JANE DELLUCCI
MAY YOUR SOUL BE SAFE AND AWAY FROM DANGER.
REST IN PEACE.
I almost scoffed at the words, Malinco was one sick motherfucker. I am having that changed. I hated that man and even the thought of him picking those words turned my stomach. How I resented him and was pleased I watched him be shot between the eyes, no more than he deserved.
“Hey mamma, I am so sorry it’s taken this long to be here, but…well, let’s say I haven’t been having fun. There isn’t a day that goes by where I haven’t thought of you and pictured your pretty smile. I need to ask you something. Is Paul my father?” With that, a gush of wind blew my hair all over the place. I heaved my breath, that was her sign, he trees blew forcing the leaves to dance together. “Well, I am pleased, he was a better man than whatever that man we lived with was. I just don’t understand why you never said anything, but I guess you had your reasons to protect me from that thing.”
