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Sighing, I force my next words through my teeth. “I don’t want to get through it together…”
“Are you being serious?” he asks, his tone sharper than before.
I nod. “I just don’t think I can do this anymore.”
He laughs, “Charlotte, you have got the best poker face. Because you really had me there for a second.”
Looking him dead in the eyes, I yank my hands from his and shout, “Reed, I’m not joking. I’m being serious!”
He stares at me, looking over every inch of my face. “I can’t believe this…why? Two days ago, we were doing great. And now, all of a sudden, you don’t want to be with me anymore? It doesn’t make any goddamn sense!”
“There’s no easy way to do this. I’m sorry…I’m just not happy anymore…” I trail off as my throat burns, and I push away the sensation.
“You’re really being serious right now?” Reed asks, his desperate voice shredding my heart.
This is for him. This is for his happiness and future. It will be your fault if you die and he ends up like your dad.
“Yes.” I grit out the word between my teeth. “I’m sorry.”
His voice is but a whisper, rapidly growing with each syllable. “You’re sorry?! I can’t fucking believe this. I can’t believe you right now.”
That’s it. Get mad. Be angry with me. Hate me. Do anything but love me.
“Will you take a day and think this through? I won’t text or call you. But take a day and think about if this is really what you want.”
He reaches for my hand again, but I pull away.
“I don’t need a day. I know this is what I want.” I bite my cheek, drawing blood.
I must be dying at this very moment. That’s the only thing that would explain the utter agony ripping me apart. At least now, I can focus on the pain in my mouth instead of the despair in my chest.
“Just like that?” he murmurs. “You can toss us away just like that? How is it so easy for you to be this cold to me? Who even are you right now?”
He is the most perfect man anyone could ever ask for. He is the love of my life and always will be. I’m helping him find the same. Which is why I need to be as cold as fucking possible. Otherwise, he will just try to talk me through it, to be logical, patient, and understanding.
“Reed, I don’t feel the same about you. I don’t love you anymore…” I love you more than life itself, is what I want to say. “I can’t do this. I’m sorry.”
Storming to my feet, I grab my purse and head to the front door. I’m two seconds from breaking down.
“Charlotte! Just wait!” Reed begs me, and I hear his voice thicken with emotion.
“I’m done, Reed. We’re done,” I say flatly, using every ounce of strength I have to not burst out in tears right now.
“You don’t love me anymore? And you’re just done? Huh, so when you said forever, always, you didn’t really mean that? I guess I didn’t realize not loving each other was ever a fucking option,” he snaps, and I hate that I’m the one causing him that anger and hurt.
“I’m sorry.” I force myself to continue through his front door.
I’m a split second from turning around and running straight into his arms. Thankfully, he doesn’t follow me through the threshold.
Thinking he’s letting me leave without chasing after me, I take a deep breath. But then I hear the front door opening behind me.
“Don’t ever talk to me again!” he shouts. “You’re right. We are done!”
The door slams shut behind me as I race to my car and crash onto my seat. Starting the engine, I pull away, desperate to be home so I don’t risk telling him the truth.
He was wrong. I did mean forever. He will always be my forever. I just won’t be his.
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