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“Honestly, that sounds perfect,” I sigh, grateful that he’s here for me.
“Sweet,” he says and turns up the music, knowing I’d rather not talk.
Jensen is my best friend and knows me better than almost anyone. Thanks to him, I don’t have to be alone right now because if I were, I would lose my mind. Far more than I already have.
Staring out of the window, I do my best to get lost in the upbeat tunes on our way to the rink. It doesn’t work very well, but I continue to try nonetheless.
Silence continues to consume us as we make our way through the pretty quiet arena. Normally, I would be chatting up staff as we pass, but I can’t even manage a half-assed smile anyone’s way. They definitely notice my coolness, but I hope they know it’s me, not them. Although it’s kind of hard to care about their reactions when my mind is utterly consumed by Charlotte and what the fuck just happened.
By the time we are geared up, slipping our skates on and stepping onto the ice, my sadness and agony are morphing into an all-consuming anger like I’ve never felt before. How could I have felt this before though? No one has ever possessed as much of my soul as she has and then tore it apart from the inside out.
Hooking my stick on one of the loose pucks, I dribble it and skate around lazily. Almost nothing beats being on the ice. It’s calming. It drowns out the world. It makes me feel centered and refreshed, like a cleanser. Unfortunately, I don’t know how much it is going to be able to do right now. No matter how much I try to clear my mind, I can’t—Charlotte refuses to fucking leave it.
Jensen rubs the back of his head as he gives me a look that twists my stomach.
I stop dead in my tracks, asking, “What?”
“Don’t be mad…” He trails off and avoids my eye contact.
“Jensen,” I warn, scared of what he could possibly be avoiding saying.
He glares at me. “My full name, really? That’s how it is?”
I can’t help but chuckle. “Sorry. But if you don’t hurry the fuck up and spit it out, I’m going to kill you.”
“But then you’d never know what I was going to say.” He laughs and holds his hands up in defense. “Okay, okay. I kind of invited the guys.”
“What?” I snap, my voice sounding more desperate than I’d like.
“Just Kos, Burnsy, Costy, and Macky,” he says casually listing out our entire fucking line, although maybe I should be thankful he didn’t text the whole team.
I was okay, feeling vulnerable with Jensy, but I’m not prepared to face all of them. My chest tightens and pulses as I hear skates hit the ice behind me.
“Our poor Reedster,” Brett sighs and skates up behind me, teasing me slightly.
Kos smacks him on the back of the head. “He will kick your ass if you keep it up.”
“My bad,” he apologizes sarcastically.
“You’re good,” I say genuinely to him, moving the puck back and forth with my stick.
“We’re here for you, dude,” Costy joins our semicircle, followed by Macky. “I can’t even imagine what you’re going through. I would lose my fucking mind if Morgan left me. Whatever you need, we’re here to help.”
I nod in gratitude and say, “Thanks, and thanks for coming, guys. I know we just got back, and you guys probably have better things to do than be here right now—”
“We don’t want to be anywhere but here,” Macky interrupts me.
“Well, let’s fucking do this then.” I huff out and skate forward, pushing the puck through Mack’s legs and picking it up behind him as I skate past him.
“Three on twos?” Kos asks, unable to shut the captain switch in him off.
“I’m down,” I say, digging my stick into the ice enough to spring the puck with force into the net.
Mack Attack gears up and gets between the pipes while we break into offense and defense. This drill is one we all grew up doing—it’s practicing your skills when you outnumber your opponent.
Three players on offense go against two players on defense. After the offense takes a shot, scoring or not, we rotate counterclockwise by one person. This switches up the teams constantly and lets everyone practice their game from different positions and places on the ice.
JD and I start on defense—it’s an easy call really since we are the defenders of the group. Kos, Burnsy, and Costy are on offense.
