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“You are a child! You know the rules! You cannot disobey me and expect me to allow it to stand!”
I stared back at him, small, sad, and impassive. I had nothing for him to take from me any longer.
But I was young still, and wrong about so many things. My father sized me up in his snapping gaze and said words that would leave me broken.
“For this disobedience, you will be punished. You will never return to the surface again.”
My mouth dropped open. “But… but Father… when I turn fifteen?—”
“You have no respect for our rules and customs, so I see no cause to allow you to benefit from them. You will be guarded at all times from this moment forward!”
My mind was spinning. I had no answer for him, but it was of no consequence, for he was not yet done.
“Alliyah will reign after me,” he announced with the cold finality that was his trademark. “She has already been informed of what is to take place.”
I gasped and felt my stomach twist into knots. Alliyah was the oldest, and though never unkind, I knew she would never dream of overriding my father, not even long after he died.
With one more withering glare, my father, gleaming trident in hand, whirled around and swam away, his silver fin angrily slashing the turbulent waters in his wake. It took three days for the sea to calm.
It was to my eternal shame that it took a full day for me to think of my nurse. It took yet another for me to seek her out. I knew she would be angry at me, and I was not ready to face her. Wherever I went, there were whispers, or looks that spoke louder than words ever could. Alliyah could barely look me in the eye at all, and seemed horribly embarrassed wherever I was around, so I did my best to avoid her.
But finally, I realized I could put it off no longer and went seeking Nurse. Normally, it did not take me long to find her, for she was either in the nursery with my sisters’ children, or the library. But both of those places were devoid of her calming presence. I checked the less usual places. All the grounds, which were extensive and something of a maze. The kitchens, which I normally avoided as the maids teased me mercilessly and tried to put me to work.
Both those searches turned up fruitless, too, and I was beginning to feel frantic. At first, I couldn’t figure out why. But as panic began a slow, torturous bloom in my chest and its petals unfurled, I knew. With a sickening dread, I knew.
And I forced myself to seek out the one person who wanted to see me less than I did them.
“Alliyah.”
My sister whirled around at the sound of my voice, her silver-blond hair a wild curtain of curls around her shocked, pale porcelain face. “Ari! I, um, hello, that is, I didn’t… I didn’t see you there.” Her voice was a squeak of dismay.
I fought back a smile. This is father’s choice? She is meek as a guppy, and not half as adventurous.
Nurse’s words came back to me: You will be Sea Queen…
And suddenly, I saw with a clarity that my young mind hadn’t even tried to grasp at the time why I would be his choice. I was brave, and nearly fearless. Or at least I could play that part convincingly. Alliyah was timid and careful. But she was my father’s girl through and through, and she was biddable.
It was only now that I was standing in front of her that I recognized the strain in her face. Stress was not something that was natural to our people, and it certainly did not show in our complexions, except in rare cases. But Alliyah’s hair was beginning to go silver well before her time and her normally lovely face was pinched and scared.
With clarity that surpassed my young years, I realized what I had done. To seek my own desires, I had caused my father to make a choice for the succession that wouldn’t be best for our people. Not only that, but my sister… I felt a surge of tenderness for her that had me taking her by the hands.
“You look tired, Alliyah.”
Her eyes, a blue that was deeper than the color of the sea, immediately widened and her lower lip began to tremble before she caught it between her teeth. “I… I don’t know… I’m not sure what you mean.” And she lifted her head, jutting her chin out, play-acting the part of a queen the way we all had taken turns doing when we were young.
My sympathy ballooned. “I… I am sorry for all that I have done. I wasn’t thinking of what might happen. I was… it was only… I had to see. To know,” I finished softly, staring down at the seafloor, unable to look at her.
At my whispered admission, her expression softened. “Was it worth it, Ari?”
I wanted to say no. She was standing before me, her palpable exhaustion a living consequence of my actions, and yet… I was supposed to say no. But I could not.
She must have seen it in my face, because she gave a small shake of her head. “Oh, Ari. And now, you will never?—”
“Please, don’t say it,” I begged. “I cannot bear to hear you say it.”
Her eyes, so unlike my own, searched my face, and then she nodded. “Very well.”
Though the reason I’d come burned within me and demanded to be answered with every pounding on my heart, something kept me from asking right away. “How are you, Alliyah?”
