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“There is nothing wrong with being emotional, Elena. You don’t need to be strong for everyone.” I tell her looking in the mirror, I peer at Luke, his headphones in as he stares vacantly out the window. Kyan is banging his rattle against the side of his car seat trying to get his attention.
“Strong is all I got left right now, Axton. My pack has had their entire lives turned upside down, and they don’t need another crying pack member. They need an Alpha,” Elena snaps before shoving the door open and climbing out of the car.
Elena moves to the trunk to pull out the stroller, and I move to help her before getting the boys out. Michelle pulls up beside us and instantly jumps out to help, and takes the stroller.
However, Luke doesn’t climb out of the car, and Elena looks around for him to find him sitting between the two car seats staring out the window. Elena leans in and waves him forward, and he climbs over the seats, falling into the passenger seat, but still, he refuses to climb out. Elena looks at me, and I step forward, trying to coax him out of the car. When he still refuses to get out, Elena crouches beside him, fixing his tie and buttoning up his suit jacket.
“We can’t stay out here with you, Luke. I have to go in.”
“I will just wait in the car,” Luke says, and Elena glances at me over her shoulder. I shrug, not understanding why he doesn’t want to go in, and she sighs heavily, turning back to face him.
“Don’t you want to say goodbye? If you don’t want to go in, I won’t force you, but I think you’ll regret it if you don’t,” she tells him.
“It’s not that I don’t want to say goodbye. It’s that everyone will have nice things to say about Mom, but what about Dad? I don’t want to listen to them speak badly about him. He wasn’t perfect, but he was still ours,” Luke says, breaking down. Watching Elena, her lip quivers, and she nods, rubbing his back in understanding.
“Nobody will speak badly about him, I promise,” Elena assures. Luke looks up at her, his eyes are puffy with the surrounding rings from crying.
“I won’t let them, okay,” she tells him.
“You promise?” Luke asks her, and she nods, leaning forward and pressing her lips to his head. When she stands, she offers him her hand, and Luke reluctantly takes it, allowing her to pull him to his feet. Locking the car, I place my hand on Elena’s back as we walk inside. The atmosphere is somber, yet there is a sense of peace in the room. We are welcomed by familiar faces of the funeral service people, and I can tell Elena is trying to take comfort in that as they discuss the service, and she tells them no one is to speak for her father.
I swallow, watching as the woman in charge of the service appears confused before understanding crosses their faces, and their eyes go to Luke. Opening the mind-link, I open it to our pack while blocking out Luke’s link, warning them if they haven’t got anything nice to say to keep their mouths shut regarding Derrick. It wasn’t uncommon for packs to list a person’s crimes when they depart. In fact, for those that betray their pack, a service is rarely held, and if it is, it’s not the sort of service one would expect. No, it’s usually not held in their honor but in their victims, giving them a chance to speak about the pain they caused them to set them free of the past of hurt.
Knowing this, I used to wonder sometimes if my funeral one day would match my father’s, or if people would be sad to see me go. I have no doubt now that’ll make up for my failures because no failure is bigger for me than not being there for Elena when she truly needed me, and if my mate can forgive me, I can live with everything else bad I’ve done because her opinion of me is the only one I care for.
While we wait for everyone to arrive, I watch Elena as she stands alone next to the casket, her eyes dark with her grief as she stares at her parents’ coffins. My heart aches for her, and I wish I could ease her pain. I wish I could shield her from all of this, but I cannot. I can only stand helplessly by her side, offering silent support.
Luke makes his way over to her, and I notice her eyes flick down toward him, tears threatening to spill, but I know she won’t let them. She is strong-headed and will not let her emotions show, even though she is in immense pain. She is trying to stay composed for her mother, also for Luke, and is showing the courage it takes to do so.
Chapter Seventy
Even when her brother breaks down and sobs, Elena remains standing tall and dignified. Her hand grasps his shoulder as she tugs him closer. She turns, leading him to his seat. Elena’s face is expressionless. Her face is a mask of stoicism as she keeps her emotions in check. Despite the tears threatening to spill, her jaw is set in determination, and her gaze is distant, as if she is looking far away from the present moment.
I know what she is doing. She is placing her own emotions on the back burner in order to remain present for her family and pack. She remains composed and gives her brother the support he needs at this time while neglecting that she needs it herself.
It is almost impossible to believe that it has already been a week since the explosion. As I look around the room that is filling with our packs and friends, the sadness of who everyone has lost begins to sink in a little deeper. Even though they’re gone, their memory lives on in all our hearts—a reminder of what Louise had done for her children. Even in death, she still managed to bless us with her love, leaving behind her daughter and my sons, whom I will cherish forever.
I take a deep breath and try my best to compose myself as more family and friends arrive. Everyone is quiet in reflection as they embrace Elena, offering their condolences.
Just like the past week, she slips effortlessly into a facade of being okay, when I know she is anything but. I notice how her hands shake, and how she tries her best to steady them when someone speaks, telling those present to switch their phones off and take a seat or stand where they’re out of the way in aisles.
The service begins, and I can feel my heart break as I watch Elena struggle with her emotions. There is no doubt that this loss has changed our lives forever.
I step forward and wrap my arms around her in a tight embrace, feeling the tremors of emotion that ripple through her body as the last of our guests enter.
The service is a solemn reminder of how fragile life can be, and how quickly it can all change. With tear-filled eyes, we say goodbye to an amazing women who will remain in our hearts forever. Louise sacrificed her life to save her kids and grandkids. And lastly, Derrick, who caused a mix of emotions amongst everyone by the looks on their faces, yet no one stood up and gave a speech for him when the woman waits with the microphone in her hand, looking expectantly at the crowd.
When I see Elena’s head turn to look for someone with a friendly face for Derrick, I watch her swallow and glance at Luke. No one rises to give a eulogy for Derrick, and I know Elena didn’t have one planned, so I am surprised when once again Elena rises. Murmurs break out as they wait for her anger or heartache, but Elena is a pillar of strength as she takes the podium and speaks for the one man no one dared to.
“I know most of you expect me to get up here and condemn my father for his actions, condemn him for being a terrible Alpha. But I can’t do that and I won’t. Despite his flaws, he was still my dad. So I won’t speak of his mistakes because we’ve all made those. We just haven’t carried them to our graves yet; we still have time to redeem ourselves for our failures. He wasn’t given that. So, I will not speak of the man, but I will speak for my father,”
Luke lifts his head beside me, staring at his sister, waiting to hear what she has to say. Leaning over a little I squeeze his shoulder.
“Growing up, he was a good father, at least to Luke and me, for the most part. Growing up as the alpha’s daughter came with great responsibility, but it also came with great pride. The love and care he showed us can never be taken away or erased.
So today, I will honor my father and his legacy. He may have been a sinner in the eyes of some, but in mine. He’ll always be the man I grew up believing was bigger than life, someone to look up to and who loved his kids and his pack.
He was the one who taught me how to hunt and how to survive without modern conveniences. My father made sure I understood our pack laws, our rituals, and traditions before I could walk. He taught me leadership skills from a young age.
