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“What are you doing?” I look at him in dismay. I can already see Rain transforming. He’s getting bigger, with dark smoke wafting around him.
And suddenly, Noah’s holding a flaming black orb in his hand, which he throws into the darkness. “She should notice us now if she hasn’t already,” he murmurs. My shocked expression doesn’t escape him, and he shrugs. “Tess, we can’t wait around here forever. There are loads of fallen in the Odyss. They could show up at any moment. If we don’t attract your aunt’s attention fast, too many of the fallen will come, and we’ll have to get out of here.”
I nod, although I feel uneasy about just standing around. What will happen? Will it be Frida who shows up or some other fallen come to attack us?
The seconds stretch out interminably. Meanwhile, I’m reminded of how many times I’ve been in this place. The Odyss no longer seems quite as sinister to me now. I’ve come here many times with Noah to learn how to summon the doors. I glance over at him and can’t deny the emotions rising in me. We were so close back then; we trusted each other blindly. But everything’s different now.
“We should take another look at Kate’s mother’s letter sometime,” he says out of the blue. His thoughts are obviously somewhere else entirely.
“I doubt we’ll ever solve that mystery,” I point out. “Kate’s mom doesn’t remember it, and Mr. Brian’s dead.”
“But we need to try everything. The goddess prophesied that it’s your destiny. You can’t just give up on your search for the library.”
I guess he’s right. But our options are pretty limited.
“I could go back to Two Trees retirement home and talk to Patricia again.” The idea makes my skin crawl. I hoped never to have to face another goddess of destiny again. Not to mention the fact that the Noctu are still guarding her. It won’t be easy for me to get to her a second time.
“That should be our last resort,” says Noah. He takes a few aimless steps. “Maybe we should …”
He stops mid-sentence and looks at something directly behind me. The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. I can feel it: there’s someone there. I slowly turn around and catch my breath.
Chapter 5
Ididn’t think he could look even more decrepit. But the figure before me looks so broken and sick that I wonder how he can stay on his feet. Greasy, matted black hair hangs in his face. Skin as dry and thin as parchment stretched over his protruding cheek bones and pointed chin. His eyes look huge in that gaunt face. And his posture is hunched as if he’s carrying the weight of the world on his boney shoulders.
Frances’ brother eyes us fearfully, then he moves two quick steps toward us and says, “I’m sorry. You have to believe me. I didn’t want this. She wasn’t supposed to die. Not her. Frances was a good person. And now she’s gone somewhere, without me. All alone. It should never have happened.”
I stare at Jacob in disbelief, unsure what to say. I can see how hard he’s taking his sister’s death and all the guilt he’s carrying because of it. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Noah clench his fists. He looks furious, but he’s holding it together.
“Why did you come?” I ask, hoping that a conversation might stop Noah from doing something rash.
“You were so loud. I couldn’t help overhearing you. And you knew Frances. You were there when she died. Because of me. It’s all my fault.” Tears glisten in his eyes.
“We’re not about to give you absolution,” Noah thunders. “Nobody will. If you’d exercised some willpower and resisted the temptation to make yourself stronger with dying breaths, it would never have come to this.”
“I keep hearing her voice,” Jacob continues as if he hasn’t heard Noah. “She calls to me, and I want to follow her. But I can’t find her. Where did she go? Is losing her my punishment? All I can do is search – just like you.”
It was clear to me last time I encountered Jacob that he’s lost his mind and lives in his own world. But now he seems even more confused if that’s possible. More desperate, anyway.
“You weren’t waiting for me, were you? You were waiting for her. But she won’t show up. She’s nursing her injuries. It’s too far to come, and too dark. Then again, with her light, she could drive out the darkness and answer so many questions. She knows everything. Do you know what I mean?”
I shake my head. No, I don’t understand anything he’s saying. Except that he no longer seems to be talking about Frances but rather … Frida?
“You’re talking about my great aunt?” I ask. “You know her because you hang around here in the Odyss by the doors. You said she was injured? Is she okay? Does she need help? Can you take me to her?”
“Help,” he croaks. “We all need help. But do we get it? No, we have to help ourselves. That’s the only thing that counts. But sometimes … sometimes you can’t do it alone.” His whole body starts to shake as he shuffles toward us with dragging steps and outstretched arms. “Free me from this suffering, please. I can’t bring myself to do it. But I can’t go on without her. The guilt, the burden, it’s crushing me. Release me from this torment, make it end. You can do it.”
Tears stream down his cheeks; snot oozes from his nose; his mouth is contorted in pain. I can tell by looking at his face and his body language how much he’s suffering, but …
I turn to Noah, and his face is as hard as stone. He looks cold, unapproachable, and … determined.
“You’re not actually considering it, are you?” I ask him.
“For him, it would be a mercy,” he says eventually, jerking his head in Jacob’s direction.
Meanwhile, Jacob has slumped to the ground and is rocking himself back and forth, murmuring two sentences over and over, “I want to come to you, sister. Maybe then we can be happy together.”
Noah raises his hand, and a black flame appears in it. His gaze is ice-cold and as dark as the gloom surrounding us.
