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“It’s required. No date, no entry.” Felix says and I turn my head towards him to study his features. I can usually tell when he’s blowing smoke up my ass but right now he looks dead serious.
“Since when are dates required?”
“It’s some formal bullshit. Let’s make a bet on how many people lie.”
Shit. I don’t even know any vir—wait. Her face instantly pops into my head and I can’t believe I didn’t think of her sooner. I grab a beer from the table in the kitchen and pop the top off on the edge.” “Oh I’d say probably eighty percent will. But not me. I already know just who to ask.” I say it like I’ve known all along.
“No way. How? I just told you about this like two minutes ago.”
“And your point?” I ask after taking a long pull from the room temperature drink. Warm beer tastes like shit. I gulp down as much as I can and turn to Felix as he downs a shot.
“What do you just have a backup list of virgins waiting for your call?”
I laugh so hard I almost choke. “Now you’re talking.”
Felix snorts and shoots back another shot. “You wish pal. And if that were true, you better hand over some names. Your boy needs help.”
I snicker and ignore his request. “Nah, not really. I prefer experienced.” More like I don’t want a girl fawning all over me since I was the first dick she had. The best dick she’ll ever have. Sad day when she realizes it.
“Facts. Virgins are the worst.”
I chuckle. “You say that like you’ve been with a few.”
“Who says I haven’t?”
I finish the rest of my beer and check the fridge for some cold ones. Nothing. “Whatever you say, bro. All I care about right now is an icy cold drink. That piss warm beer did nothing for me.” I scan the countertop’s selection of liquor and pull out a couple. Grabbing a cup, I get to work, mixing and shaking and stirring, lost in my own little world. Felix plops two cups of ice down in front of me. “You read my mind.”
“I ain’t missing out on one of your mixed drinks, dude. They’re the best around.”
“Thanks.” I fill up our cups and hand Felix his.
He takes a sip and his face lights up. “Can’t even taste the alcohol.”
I nod before taking my own sip. Delicious perfection. Just like me. I wink at the hot blonde hovering next to the fridge. She whispers and giggles behind her glass with the girl next to her.
I chuckle to myself. Girls can’t resist when I come on to them. Buy them dinner first? Ha. Not needed. They’re in my pants before we even make it to the restaurant.
My inner manly man gorilla stance wants to break free and I straighten my back while slightly puffing out my chest. Then I toss the hot blonde another wink before I turn and exit the kitchen. Felix doesn’t follow me this time but I don’t care. Instead I plop my ass down in the first chair I pass and pull out my phone. Notifications pop up, the latest one announcing the upcoming fraternity event Felix just informed me of. I click the screen and the announcement opens up fully.
Ask a virgin to a party event happening next Saturday Sept 25. 7-11pm, all ticket sales will be used to raise money for the fraternity, all members of the fraternity are expected to attend, this is formal attire, dress to impress. Awards will be given for best outfits, one male, one female, and everyone will fetch them their drinks all night. All members are expected to participate in helping sell tickets, set up the party, and clean up. More info coming at Monday night’s meeting- see you there.
I click out of the message and shove my phone back in my pocket. Formal attire, hmm? I’ll need a bomb ass tux to rent. Something no one else will have.
My date’s outfit will need to match, and we’ll need flowers. We need to look good so we’ll win that award and enjoy everyone bringing us our drinks all night. Plus I don’t lose. Ever. Plain and simple.
So exactly who do I have in mind to ask?
Everleigh Peters.
The cute, sweet, shy girl who everyone knows is still a virgin even though no one will actually say it out loud. But we all know. She doesn’t even have to come out and say it, and it’s been the word around campus a time or two. More like rumors and speculation, but there’s always some truth lurking, isn’t there?
I, like everyone else, never see her with guys, besides the ones in our friend group. Has she even kissed a guy?
Ha. Probably not.
Doesn’t matter. She’s fun to rile up. Watching her blush when conversations turn to sex, or seeing her squirm with topics she finds uncomfortable, fuck that shit turns me on. But that’s besides the point. With her, it’s strictly fun and games.
Besides, it’s not like we’ll hook up. So there’s no chance of clinginess or awkward bullshit. Well awkward for her. I won’t give two shits.
