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“Leo was a jerk who broke your heart. He’s not the standard of every guy. Besides love doesn’t wait for you, sis. It comes when it wants, whether you’re looking for it or not, whether you were hurt by it or not, or even if you simply don’t want it. And there’s a way you smile at Landon that seems…different. I’ve never seen it before.”
“Bells, did you drink too much spiced eggnog? There is no different smile. How can you tell over a FaceTime call?”
“Um, hello? Do you not remember I’m your sister? I’ve known you my whole life. I know all your smiles and then some.”
“Pssh, your smile can change as you grow older, and you don’t see me everyday anymore.”
“Do you realize how far you’re explaining yourself about smiles right now? Why’s that, Ev? Trying to distract me from the fact that you like Landon?”
I toss a chip at her head. “How about we talk about you, Bella? No boyfriends, no casual dating, nothing? I highly doubt it.”
“It’s true. I’m too busy studying and working.”
“Hook ups?”
“I tried but it’s hard for me. After a few times with the same person, feelings creep in and shit becomes all messy. I’m not against finding a boyfriend, but I’m not out looking either.”
“I think you’ll like Felix.”
Bella’s eyes light up. “Tell me about him. Got any pictures?”
“No, but I’ll sneak one next time I see him or something. He’s a nice guy, a junior, in the fraternity, Landon mentored him.”
“Hmm, interesting. I’m not so sure about a frat guy. But I’ll give him a try. I trust you.”
“Would your big sister ever steer you wrong?”
Bella taps her chin. “I’m sure I can think of one time. Oh! Like the time you told me my Barbies went missing and what really happened was you bagged them up and put them in the trash. Remember that?” She throws a random memory out from years ago.
“You can’t bring up stupid shit from the past. If it’s been over a year, it no longer counts.”
“Says who?”
“Me. Now eat your chips, watch the movie, and stop bugging me about Landon.”
“If you would admit you like him already, I wouldn’t need to stop the movie to ask you questions.”
I grab the remote and press play. “Shh, it’s back on.”
Bella laughs. “Nice one. You’re not off the hook yet.”
She wasn’t exaggerating.
Finally, on the morning of the day I was leaving to head back to school, I told her I might still have a little crush on him. But it’s nothing. It won’t ever be anything. Landon doesn’t look at me like that. He doesn’t look at any girl like that.
Why would I set myself to be hurt?
Yet on the ride back to school, I can’t get Bella’s questions out of my head.
Maybe I should just cut my losses and end it all right now. I’ll skip the wedding next weekend, even if I know my parents and Bella will be mad.
But I know I won’t. Because it’s all fake, right? So what does it matter?
I’m only back at school for a week before I’m packing an overnight bag to head home for the weekend. My cousin’s wedding is tomorrow and it’s in the next town over from where I grew up. I plan on crashing at my parents’ after and driving home the next morning.
Landon’s plan is to meet me there. I haven’t seen him since before the holiday break but I text him tonight with the address of the church and what time to be there. He’s bringing Felix with him and they have plans to rent a hotel room for the night.
“Hey,” Len knocks on my door and peeks her head in. “What time are you heading out in the morning?”
