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I retreat to my bedroom, quickly sifting through the clothes hanging in my closet. There’s a pink silk slip dress with a lace-trimmed neckline and hem—more of a glorified nightgown than anything else—that Alfio gave me months ago, and I slip it off of the hanger. Maybe seeing me wearing a gift from him will soften the consequences of showing up on his doorstep out of the blue. I know he likes the dress—he nearly ripped it off of me the first time I wore it for him.
Quickly, I slip the dress and a pair of ballet flats on, running a brush through my long blonde hair. I wear it up more often than not, but I leave it loose tonight, falling in a silky waterfall down between my shoulderblades. A swipe of mascara to darken my light-colored eyelashes and a little bit of tint on my lips, and I’m ready to go. Alfio prefers me with as little makeup as possible—he likes the delicacy of my features and the simplicity of a bare face, but so few men actually understand what goes into creating that sort of look.
Niki is still in the kitchen when I make my way towards the front door, and I’m glad. I don’t want him to see me dressed up like this and wonder where it is that I’m going.
Darcy sees me as I walk out, and she presses her lips together. There’s no disapproval on her face, though, only concern. She murmurs something to Niki, getting up from the table, and I tense as she walks up to me.
“Are you going to be alright?” she asks quietly, her gaze flicking over what I’m wearing. “You’re going to see him, aren’t you?”
“Maybe.” I bite my lip, wondering how honest I should be about what’s going on. “I haven’t heard from him, and Niki’s therapy wasn’t paid for today. If he doesn’t follow through on what he promised last time?—”
Darcy’s eyes widen a little. “You’re just going to see him? Without?—”
I nod. “I have to figure this out. Please—just keep Niki from getting too worried, okay? I’ll text you when I get there and when I leave.”
“Okay.” Darcy lets out a sharp breath. “Just be careful, alright? Men like that?—”
She doesn’t have to finish the sentence. I know as well as she does how someone like Alfio might react to what I have planned. But it doesn’t change the fact that I don’t feel as if I have any choice.
If he’s abandoned me on a whim, I have no idea what I’m going to do. I’m willing to risk a confrontation in order to find out.
I call an Uber, giving Darcy one last reassuring smile as I head outside into the chilly evening. I can’t really afford it, but I’m hoping the cost is made up by the help I’ll get from Alfio. I shift nervously as I stand outside, waiting for it, trying not to think about what will happen after I get there.
The uneasy feeling that I’ve had all day only grows on the ride over. Something is wrong. The thought has stuck in my head, worming deeper and deeper until I tangle my fingers tightly together in my lap, all of my focus concentrated on not panicking. I’ve gotten very good at managing my emotions for Niki, but right now, without him here to worry about, it’s proving difficult.
The Uber drops me a block or so away from Alfio’s mansion, as I asked. I tuck my hands into the pockets of my burgundy faux-leather jacket, walking quickly to the iron gate. I remember, too late, that there are always guards out front. I might not even get far enough to talk to him, if he really doesn’t want to see or speak to me. He’ll just have me turned away, and I won’t have any choice but to go home.
When I get to the front of the mansion, though, there’s no one there. There are no guards standing by the outer gate or the inner one, and both are cracked open, unlocked. That uneasy feeling in my gut turns to a cold chill, beginning in the pit of my stomach and sweeping outwards.
I no longer feel as if I’m blowing anything out of proportion by thinking that something is very, very wrong.
I should leave. I already know that, before I ever take a step inside the outer gate. Something has happened here, something beyond what I’m equipped to deal with, and I need to go. But that same desperation that caused me to call an Uber and come here in the first place propels me forward, through the inner gate and across the courtyard, all the way up to the huge mahogany front door of Alfio’s mansion.
I’ve been here once before. He brought me here for a weekend, one that I don’t like to remember. I was worried about Niki for all of it, and had to pretend that I wasn’t. I tried my best to hide it, but Alfio picked up on my mood, and he punished me for it—for not being entirely focused on him.
I wish I could be happy at the idea of being free of him. I wish I could feel anything but this desperate fear that I’ll be left on my own to figure this all out again.
Carefully, I reach for the doorknob. I expect it to be locked, but the door turns easily, opening up into the main entryway of the mansion. It’s dark and quiet inside, with no guards to be seen, and I feel that chill creep up my spine again.
Surely even if he’d gone away on business, or vacation, he would have left someone behind. He wouldn’t leave the mansion entirely unattended, without anyone to keep an eye on it.
I close the door behind myself, trying not to make a sound. If anyone is here, I want to go unnoticed as long as possible, until I can try to figure out what’s going on. Years of ballet has left me light on my feet, and I creep through the entryway and towards the stairs.
Slowly, I make my way up the stairs, one at a time, listening for any signs of life in the house. I’m not even sure what I’m looking for, exactly, other than some reassurance that Alfio hasn’t simply disappeared—or at least some explanation for what’s happened.
I reach the top of the stairs, turning down a hallway, when I hear a sudden, deep voice coming from Alfio’s bedroom. It’s not his voice, though, and I freeze, my heart suddenly thudding in my chest. There’s the sound of footsteps, heading towards the bedroom doors, and I back up rapidly, smacking into another closed door. I fumble for the knob, frantically opening the door just in time to slip inside and close it behind me before I hear Alfio’s bedroom door open.
Breathing hard, I lean back against the closed door of the room I’m now in. I glance around, trying to get my bearings, and I realize I’m in another bedroom. It looks as if someone left some things behind—there’s a handful of personal items scattered over a dresser, and next to it, a metal money clip with bills folded into it and an expensive-looking watch.
I swallow hard, staring at the money and the watch. I know I shouldn’t even think about what’s crossing my mind. I know that if Alfio does come home, or his guests, or whoever left this here, and its discovered that I stole it, I’ll pay in worse ways than I can imagine. I have no idea what Alfio might do to me for something like that.
But I also have a deep, relentless feeling that something bad has happened here. Something that means that my ‘relationship’ with Alfio is a thing of the past, one way or another. And if that’s true, then I’m going to need all the help I can get.
Before I can talk myself out of it, I dart forward, scooping the money and the watch off of the dresser. I shove the money and the watch into my purse, clutching it close to me as I press my ear to the door and try to hear if the person in the other bedroom has left yet.
There are no sounds of footsteps. The voice has faded. And I need to get out of here.
Alfio isn’t home, I feel sure of that. Whoever is, is probably someone I should avoid. I can keep trying to get in touch with Alfio later, but for now, I need to leave.
