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Breakfast, as it turns out, when I lift the covers off of the plates, is scrambled eggs with cheese, bacon, and pancakes. I suspect Lorenzo ordered it all from somewhere—I don’t believe he can cook—but it doesn’t matter a bit to me. The thought of him doing this for us makes me feel warm and soft inside. The three of us devour the food, Darcy helping Niki up afterward to get him to the living room and parked in front of the television.
After, she comes back, closing the door with a serious look on her face. “I’m giving you the benefit of the doubt,” she says quietly. “But I need to know everything.”
So I tell her. All of it, beginning with Alfio’s murder and meeting Lorenzo in the mansion, to my offer that I made him and his counteroffer of a job, all of the times we saw each other between then and now. I tell her about Egor at the afterparty, and at the club, about how I broke my ankle, and Lorenzo’s reaction. “I’m sorry,” I whisper, when I’ve finished it all. “I see now I should have told you from the beginning. I thought it would be better if I didn’t—you’d be safer, and you wouldn’t worry. But you got caught up in it anyway, and if you’d known, at least you could have decided for yourself. I didn’t think there was any risk to you; I really didn’t?—”
I can feel tears starting to slide down my face again, and Darcy lets out a breath, coming to sit next to me on the bed. “I know,” she says quietly. “I know you wouldn’t have put me in danger on purpose. Or Niki. I don’t think either of us could have understood how dangerous this would be. And I can understand why you did it.”
“You do?” I bite my lip, looking at my friend, and she nods slowly.
“I understand. That doesn’t mean that I think it was right. You should have talked to me. I would have helped. I have savings?—”
“I couldn’t have asked that of you?—”
“It would have been better than you selling drugs.” Darcy lets out a sharp breath. “I know it’s hard for you to rely on others, Mila. I really do. But you should have trusted me. We would have found a way. You’re like a sister to me. I care about Niki like a brother. We would have figured it out.”
“What about now?” I whisper, and she sighs, glancing at the door.
“I thought about it all last night, while I cleaned up, and this morning. I should say I need space, that I’m going to give it some time and see if I still want to be a part of this. I saw the way Lorenzo looked at you—I don’t think he’s going anywhere.” Darcy runs a hand through her hair.
“But—” I say softly, and Darcy shakes her head.
“Like I said—you and Niki are like family to me. I love you both. I’d miss you both terribly.” Darcy looks down at her hands. “I’m a little scared. Of him—of what happened. Of this sort of life that you seem to be a part of. But I don’t want to not be a part of yours.”
There’s something small and soft in her voice as she says it, and I lean towards her, wrapping my arms around her in a hug. Darcy leans in, returning the embrace, and we stay like that for a long moment before she pulls away.
“Are you going to stay here?” she asks finally, looking around the room. “With him?”
“I don’t know,” I tell her honestly. “It mostly depends on Niki and how he feels. But I don’t know if we can go back there. A new place, maybe—” I bite my lip, looking at the door. “I just don’t know.”
As it turns out, Niki doesn’t want to leave. Darcy stays for another day, and Lorenzo sends men to keep an eye on her apartment after she goes home—with her permission—to make sure no one is watching her place. Niki and I share the master bedroom for a week, Lorenzo sleeping down the hall, until he finally feels safe enough to sleep in a guest bedroom alone. By then, Lorenzo has retrieved all of our things from the old apartment—and broken the lease with the landlord—and I take Niki to the new room to find out that Lorenzo has set it up exactly the way Niki’s room was in our apartment.
I cover my mouth with my hand, looking at him in surprise. “You didn’t have to?—”
“I know,” he says softly. “But I thought it might make it easier for him to stay. And I very much want you to stay.”
Niki bounds across the room, jumping onto the bed that’s much bigger and much softer than his was before. He curls up into a ball, looking at us, and Lorenzo’s arm around my waist tightens. Anytime he’s home, and I’m upright, his arm is around me, as if he’s constantly worried I’ll overdo it if he’s not holding me.
“Do you like it, buddy?” I ask, and Niki nods enthusiastically. “Are you gonna be able to sleep in here?”
He nods again, and I hobble over to him, tucking him in and giving him a kiss goodnight. Lorenzo even brought his nightlight, and as I glance back before Lorenzo and I leave, I feel tears burn at the back of my eyes.
“Thank you,” I whisper softly, when we’re back out in the hall. “That means so much to me. You have no idea.”
“I think I have some idea.” He leans down, kissing the top of my head gently, and then scoops me up into his arms.
He carries me all the way to bed, sliding in next to me as I change into my sleep clothes and get under the covers. It’s not until I’m lying next to him, tucked against his chest, that he finally speaks.
“I’ve never spent the night with someone in my bed before,” he says quietly, and I turn to look at him, startled.
“Never?”
Lorenzo shakes his head. “Never,” he murmurs, leaning down to kiss my temple. “I never wanted to.”
I roll over, curling into him. My entire body is aching for him, but in this particular moment, I just want to be held. I wonder if he’ll mind, when it’s been so long since the last time, but he doesn’t seem to. His hand strokes down the side of my waist, over my hip, and he lets out a slow breath.
“I thought about this all the nights I was in the guest room. I hoped you’d stay long enough for this. For me to sleep with you next to me in my bed.” He hesitates on the my, as if he nearly said ours. But it’s not our bed, not yet.
“I want to stay,” I say softly. “We just have to see how things go. I?—”
