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“Yeah, Dad. I can understand that.” I glanced down at the contract sitting on the table that I still hadn’t signed. Dean Langston had emailed me, letting me know they’d agreed to all my changes, yet here it sat, unsigned.
River had spent so much time making tweaks over the last few weeks, and he’d told me I should never rely on a man who wasn’t very lawyerly to be the last set of eyes on the contract. So, I’d promised to read it all the way through before I signed it. I’d made up excuses to Dean Langston that my internet was down, that I’d sent it back, and it must have gotten lost in the universe—but the verbal acceptance seemed to appease him for now.
Tonight, I would sit down and read every damn word of the contract, sign it, and send it back.
I’d planned to do that this morning, but I’d woken up feeling a little off today. I’d felt a little off every day for the last four days.
It was him.
The loss of him.
This had never happened to me before. But here I was.
My chest aching for a man who wasn’t mine.
“Tell me what your plans are for today. Doreen is coming to pick me up, and we’re going to the Golden Goose for lunch, and then I’m heading over to the bar to check on things.”
He didn’t want me to baby him; he’d made that clear. “I’m going to stop by to see Pearl Pierce before I head over to Fresh Start. Terrence wants to talk to me before I leave, and I’ll get to say goodbye to the kids. I’ll be at the bar after. I’m working tonight, so you’ll be on your own for dinner.”
He smiled. “That’ll be just fine. You didn’t need to stay an extra week to take care of me. You’ve done enough. I’m fine on my own, and you need to go start your big job.”
“I wanted to make sure you were settled before I left,” I said, and that lump formed in my throat again, just like it had been doing more and more the closer I got to leaving.
“It’s still what you want, right? The professor job? You’ve worked so hard and accomplished so much.” And that sent my thoughts spiraling all over again.
“Yeah, Dad. I—” What did I want? Why was I struggling so much? “I just worry about you.”
“We’re not doing that, Rubes. I’m fine,” Dad gruffed, then hit me again with another worry of mine. “You sure spend a lot of time out there at Fresh Start with the kids, huh? You like it, don’t you?”
“Yeah. It’s been really great. I feel like I’m making a difference by helping them see an attainable future and hopefully realizing that they aren’t stuck just because of one bad choice. I’ve really enjoyed my time there.” And I did. I’d miss itfor sure. When I was there, I thought of a young River. I thought about how much I wished someone had been there to protect him during that time.
He smiled, and it reached his eyes. It was one of my favorite things about my dad. “You’ve always been good at fixing things. Finding broken things and putting them back together.”
I rolled my eyes and chuckled at the same time. “These are actual humans, Dad, not things. And they aren’t broken; they’re just a little damaged.”
“I know, but that’s your strength. You’ve done it with your brothers. You’ve done it with me. Hell, even the guys that you’ve dated. You find them damaged, and then you fix them before you leave them for good.” His voice was all tease, but I startled at his words.
What the actual hell is he talking about?
“I’ll agree that I try to do what I can to help my family, but not in my dating life. I don’t look for men who need to be fixed. I typically seek out men who want the same thing as me. Nothing too serious.” I crossed my arms over my chest defensively.
“Please. I’ve met three men that you’ve dated, and they’ve all had the same issue.”
I narrowed my gaze. “What are you talking about?”
“Let’s start with your undergrad boyfriend, Dalton. He was a train wreck when you met him.”
“He’d found his girlfriend in bed with his roommate. He was slightly broken.”
“And you put him back together, made him fall in love again when he thought he never would, and then you hit the road. It’s your shtick. You fix them and leave them.”
I gasped. “That’s not true. He just got too attached, and I didn’t feel the same way about him.”
He raised a brow and bit down on his apple slice. “Right. You showed him how to love again, and then sent him on his way. And how about Devil? You did the same to him.”
“His name is Devlyn, and he’d spent a year in prison in a foreign country right before I met him. He was traumatized. He had no idea that you couldn’t travel with marijuana.” I shrugged. I hadn’t expected this trip down memory lane today. “So he was down on himself, and he didn’t feel worthy of love. It was a sad situation.”
“Well, by the time you were done with him, he was all in. Didn’t he propose to you?”
