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“No, Liam. Nothing like that. Can we just talk? I need to get this out.”
“We’re listening,” Jane says, holding onto Liam's hand to keep him calm.
“I’ll be leaving the practice. Actually, I’m leaving the country. With Noah.”
A prolonged silence fills the room as a dumbfounded Liam looks at me like I’ve lost my mind.
“You’re such a dumb shit,” Liam hisses at me, and the venom in his voice catches me off guard.
“Liam! Don’t speak to him like that. What's the matter with you?” Jane admonishes him.
“What's wrong with me? That’s rich. He’s giving up his life for a psychopath who has brainwashed and lied to him!” he yells. It’s taking every ounce of energy for Liam not to walk over to me and shake me. I can see it. His hands are fisted by his side, his eyes are wild and angry. Disappointed. Now, that's a look I’ve gotten used to from him over the past few weeks.
“I don’t understand. What psychopath?” Jane asks, confusion written all over her face.
“He means one of my patients who I’ve fallen in love with and am now in a relationship with,” I say.
After another few beats of silence, Jane gathers her thoughts together from the completely crazy information I’ve just offloaded to her.
“Chase…honey, don’t you think that's unwise? I mean, you should know this, right? Won’t you be in danger?” she asks so innocently.
“No I won’t. But I appreciate the concern.”
“You leave with him, and our friendship is over, Chase. I can’t stand by and watch you do this and be here for when it blows up in your face. You need help,” Liam seethes, and it's like a dagger to my chest.
I stand from my chair and look at my now old friend. I didn’t want this. Maybe I’m being selfish and unrealistic, but his unwillingness to listen to me and try to understand is all I can take.
“You’re a judgemental asshole, Liam. Not once have you allowed me to explain. Not everything is so black and white. Doyou have any idea how shit life has been for me? It’s okay for you to judge me from your happy home and married life. But who do I have?”
“Us! Tyler. Fucking hell, Chase, how can you not see it?”
“Noah has been there for me, held me up, taken care of me. Our job is to help, Liam. Not cast opinions on who our patients are or judge them. I love him. He makes me happy. I don’t expect you to be buddies but I thought you would try to hear me, to understand.”
“You’re fucking delusional, Chase. You need to be locked up beside him.”
Wow. Fuck that hurt, and by the grimace on his face I know he regrets it but will be too stubborn to admit it. But he’s made his choice. I’m not welcome.
“He’ll destroy you, Chase. You’ll lose yourself to him. He’ll never change.”
Shaking my head in disappointment, I accept it for what it is.
“Thanks for the advice. I’ll hand in my notice on Monday.”
I go to leave, and when I’m nearly at the door, Jane comes up behind me and grabs my arm.
“He doesn’t mean it, Chase. He loves you. We both do. I don’t fully understand what's going on, but please believe that he didn’t mean it,” she says, as her eyes fill with tears. I bend down and kiss her on the head. Who knows if I’ll ever see her again.
“You take care, Jane. Enjoy your life. You deserve the best. You both do,” I say, and walk out of the door without looking back.
Walking down the porch steps toward my car door, a bolt of lightning bursts through my heart at the feeling of Noah’s eyes on me. I know he detects something’s wrong. It's like we connect through radio waves or some shit, but I just know he’s pissed and we need to get home.
As I sit in my car, I cast a final look at my friends’ house, holding back the emotions that want to burst out of my eyes. But as I look in my rear view mirror and see Noah, I instantly calm knowing I have a future ahead of me that I will grab with both arms.
After handing in my resignation,my last day at work approaches and I feel nothing but relief. Happiness. A few co-workers took me out for a goodbye lunch, which Liam of course didn’t attend. I won’t lie and say that the brutal end of our friendship doesn’t hurt, because it does. It’s like I’ve lost a limb. Liam was like a second brother, but sometimes you have to lose to gain. And what I have with Noah is worth every bit of pain.
I look around my office as I slowly pack my belongings away before I head out. Looking over at my therapy area, I remember all the patients that I’ve seen over the years, the tears that have filled this room, the anger and feelings of hopelessness. I truly do hope I’ve managed to help and make a difference to some of my patients. My office door opens and I’m surprised when I turn to see that it’s Liam walking through and closing the door behind him. The atmosphere shifts to an uncomfortable awkwardness, so much so, I’m too nervous to speak. I’ve no idea what to say to him anymore.
“Hey,” he says. Stuffing his hands in his pockets.
