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“When it’s time,” he concedes. “Let me do this my way to start with. I won’t let anything hurt you. Ever.” He gives me a soft kiss on the lips with his declaration.
“But you’re hurting me by doing this,” I whisper, pulling back from the kiss.
“I know, baby. Sometimes we have to hurt to come out stronger in the end. I promise you it’s for the best. Just know when I’m mean to you at school I don’t truly mean it.” His hand caresses my face before he wraps his fingers around my neck to hold me in place as his thumb brushes across my lips.
“So like we have our own secret language?” I mumble against his thumb. His touch is doing a good job of distracting me.
“Yes. When I tell you to go away or that I hate you. I’m really saying that I love you.” He pulls me forward once again and presses his lips to mine. I get lost in his kiss and open my lips when I feel his tongue run against them. Sinking deeper into his hold and kiss, I let him take control until he finally pulls back. A small whine leaves me when he breaks the kiss before he places a soft one against my forehead. “Get back to school before you’re missed, baby.”
Trevor lifts me off his lap and gently places me back on my feet. Every part of me wants to curl back up in his lap and not let go, but I know it has to be this way. I’ll trust him and let him do this his way, but I’m putting my foot down the second it starts to go south.
“Don’t leave me completely,” I murmur.
Taking one long last look at him to get my fill I turn and walk away, knowing that if I didn’t,I just might never be able to unless he left first. I’m not positive, but I could have sworn he said he wouldn’t as I walked away. Inside I was a mess with my heart breaking every step I took. Outside I kept my face blank and followed the trail back to school. I knew I needed to return before the car came to pick up my sister and me from school.
“Emma!” my sister scolds as I come around from the back of the building to the car pick-up line. “Where the hell have you been? The car’s been waiting for a couple of minutes.”
“Sorry, I got tied up in the library working on a group project I was assigned in history.” The lie flows smoothly off my lips. I put my hands into the pocket of my hoodie, and that’s when I feel it. A piece of paper that Trevor must have slipped into my pocket. My fingers wrap around it tightly so nothing happens to it. Tonight in secret I’ll read it.
SEVEN
TREVOR
“You need to get your head in the game,” Rome hisses as he hands me my bag outside the changing room.
My only response is a grunt and nods as I take the bag and head inside. He’s not wrong. I thought we wouldn’t see Emma until the end. Seeing her now already has my head all kinds of fucked up. It’s been too many years since I’ve seen her. Too many years since I’ve been this close to her. It kills me not to be able to tuck her into my arms and never let her go. She was and always has been my world. I’ll make sure when this is over she understands that.
Knowing that Emma will be watching my first fight brings on nerves I didn’t even know I had. My heart picks up just thinking about it and her. I know she’ll be watching my every move whether she wants to be or not. I’ll have to put on a good show for her and her father. I can’t make this look too easy, though most of these opponents I’ve followed in the underground MMA circuit, and they won’t stand a chance.
Inside the makeshift locker room, all the guys are going through their routine getting ready. As we were led back here, April advised someone would come to get us when it was our time to fight. We weren’t to know the schedule ahead of time. A few of the men grumbled at that, but I expected it. No need to let us start a fight back here when they want us to put on a show for everyone who came to watch. Heading to the cubby I claimed earlier, away from most of the others, I open the bag Rome handed and see none of my items have been touched.
Good. I feared security might be rooting through everyone’s bags to look for weapons. Not that I brought any with me, but I much prefer it if no one touches my stuff.
Right on top are the noise-canceling headphones I had packed. Grabbing them, I throw them on, hook them up to the Bluetooth on my phone, and get my fight playlist started. Most of it is filled with rock music, but I added a couple of outliers to mix it up. The second I hit play Devour by Shinedown starts blasting. My nerves begin to relax as I sink my mind into the zone.
It doesn’t take long for me to change from the fancy suit I was wearing into the pair of black grappling shorts I brought to fight in. Taking my time, I start the therapeutic process of wrapping my hands. When I first started fighting in eighth grade, my teacher taught me the importance of properly wrapping my hands. For hours he would make me sit there and wrap my hands over and over again until I got it right. By the time I could do it the way my trainer wanted it was when he finally let me have a stab at the bags. That was his teaching method; start with the basics and prove I was proficient in them before I was allowed onto the next step. Back then it drove me absolutely insane, but now I appreciate how he taught me. It’s made me a much better fighter for it, and I’m thankful.
Over and over I go through the process of wrapping and unwrapping my hands. I try not to think about the other fighters in the room or even Emma. No, this moment is about me and what I’m here to do. Fight.
“Aiden. Jax. You both will fight first,” April’s high-pitched voice calls out when she enters the room.
Opening my eyes, I watch both fighters stand and walk out. Insults are already being thrown between both of them mainly from Aiden. I shouldn’t be surprised by the ego that man has. It will eventually be his downfall. I’m glad he isn’t going to be my first opponent. Though I’m almost positive he’s going to win this fight. If he walks away losing, I’ll be shocked.
We all knew this night would be long with us all getting through the fights. Usually, for a fight like this, there are five rounds at five minutes each. I’m assuming it will be the same this time, with some intermissions in between to help break up the fights and allow the crowd to get pumped once more.
Looking around the room, I see the other fighters going through their own routines as we await our turns. From here the roar of the crowd can be heard before they start to quiet down as the announcer signifies the start of the fight. That’s when I tune the outside noises out. I don’t want to hear a breakdown of the fight or who the winner is. We all will know when it’s over.
Closing my eyes again, I go back to the muscle memory of wrapping and unwrapping my hands as I think back to the first time Emma ever watched me fight.
It was my sophomore year of high school, and the underground MMA circuit was taking off in our area. My father had entered me into a fight being held at an abandoned factory in Rockport with the expectation that I would come out the winner. For the past year, I had hidden the dark side of my life from her. She knew I had been sent away because of her father, but she didn’t realize that the path for fighting had been set upon me from it. Only in the dead of night on Friday nights would I fight. Giving myself enough time to heal and cover my injuries before school again Monday. On the day of a big fight, several members of our class found out and talked about this epic underground fight that would take place that night in the next town.
Emma overheard them talking about it and begged me to take her. I told her no repeatedly. Not only because it was risky to sneak her out but also because I didn’t want her to see me in that kind of light. I should have known though that she always finds a way when she wants to.
She convinced her father to let her have a sleepover at one of her cheer teammates' houses. From there, the group of them snuck out and met up with some members of the football team who drove them to fight.
Thank god Emma had been texting me the whole time so I knew she was on the way. I was fucking livid when she told me, but I knew it was too late to do anything about it. Instead, I gathered a couple of my buddies from school and the gym and had them watch and protect her all night. We cleared off a broken pillar that would give her perfect eyesight of the room and keep her off the floor and away from the mayhem that was sure to ensue. It wasn’t much, but with the bit of time I had, it was the best I could do. My best friend at the time promised to escort her there and watch her like a hawk. He wasn’t too happy leaving me without someone in my corner, but he knew I would lose this fight if she wasn’t safe. He took the lesser of two evils;I’ll forever be thankful for it.
The fight started as all the others did. Blow for blow. We took our turns, and each did some damage. It was near the end of the fight when things got shady and then went to shit. I had my opponent pinned. His friend slid a knife into the cage, and I almost didn’t see it. Well, I didn’t until Emma let out a blood-curdling scream of my name. With a quick look at her to make sure she was safe, I caught the terror in her eyes and looked in the direction she was pointing. Right to the switchblade that he almost had in his hand. I rolled both of us away from it, snapping my opponent's arm, put him back in a chokehold, and knocked him the fuck out.
