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“I’ve got plenty in the tank. Worry about yourself.” He disappeared out the door.
My thoughts crowded together inside my head in the quiet of the office. I headed down to the grounds because I did my best thinking outside. The cold air rushed over me as I opened the front door. My whistle brought my dogs running over. The massive hounds butted against me as I rubbed their heads. They both stood to my waist, and despite being highly trained security dogs, they loved a good fuss. I grabbed two balls and threw them off into the darkness, walking after them across the lawn. They chased about as I devised a plan.
10
Jolting awake, I tangled with my sheets and dropped off the side of the bed, jarring my left side as I landed. My heart thudded against my ribs as memories of my mamá’s body swam in front of my eyes. The dream had been so real. I untwisted myself and hauled myself off the floor, shivering as the cool air hit my sweaty limbs. I shuffled off to the shower to try to wash away the images. They were a stark reminder of where getting tangled up with dangerous men got you.
The rest of Saturday was a total wash. I tried to study, but I couldn’t settle into anything. He invaded my every thought. And each time it happened, a pit in my stomach appeared as I remembered Mamá’s fate. Maybe because I didn’t have a normal teenage life, all those stupid crush feelings they talk about in TV shows were showing up now. It was ridiculous, as I’d barely spoken to the guy. All he’d done was order me about. Why was he consuming my thoughts? His tip money had helped as it secured my rent for the next few months, but I knew it was deeper than that. It was the attention. His intense focus on me was heady.
For years, I blended in, hiding and getting by, slowly getting closer to realising the dream I swore I would achieve. There was no room for relationships. Sex was transactional, something to use as a last resort. Never something to look forward to. Sean’s appearance in my life stirred feelings inside me I’d never experienced, and it reminded me how lonely I’d grown. I had friends, but none of them knew me. But a few days in his orbit, he made me feel like he saw me. It had me wanting to do something stupid.
Thoughts like these harassed me on the drive to the club. In the dressing room, I fretted about defying Sean and then got annoyed that I was even bothering. You aren’t property. I swiped the winged liner on aggressively, going for a heavy hand tonight. Sparkly black eyeshadow completed my dark look.
In the mirror, I spotted Larry poking his head around the door.
“Amy? You’re needed in the office.”
My stomach dropped. Surely not?
“Fucking hell, are you banging the security too?” Kelsie screeched.
“Put your claws away, Kelsie. We don’t need your bullshit tonight.” Michelle pointed her lipstick at her.
Kelsie flipped her off and flounced away. I sent Michelle a grateful smile, debating whether to grab my robe, but I had little booty shorts on tonight and a bikini top. Fuck it.
I strode out of the changing room, wiping my sweaty hands on my shorts and feigning more calm than I felt. Larry fell into step with me.
“I’m sorry to call you out here, but will you look at my tooth?”
I stopped dead. “What?”
This wasn’t about Sean?
“Listen, I know you told me not to say anything about your degree, and I swear I haven’t, but my filling fell out.” He held his cheek on the left, pointing inside his mouth. “I’ve had a toothache all day; I can’t eat anything hot or cold, and I can’t get into my dentist until next week.”
I glanced around uneasily. Larry often walked me to my car, and he saw my dental school information and textbooks. He agreed to keep it between us.
“We aren’t in a dental clinic here, Larry. And I’m not qualified.”
“I know, but I googled it and got a temporary filling kit, and I thought maybe you could look.”
“It would be better to get an emergency appointment.”
“I’m supposed to be working all weekend,” he pleaded.
I caved at his puppy dog eyes.
“Okay, but I haven’t got any equipment, and I might not be able to do much,” I told him as we headed for the office.
Since Kia arrived, the office looked tidier, although it still smelled strongly of cigarette smoke from Teresa’s habit. I sat Larry in the swivel chair, letting it down to its lowest point so I could lean over and look into his mouth.
“Have you got a light on your phone?” I asked him, standing on my tiptoes.
He nodded and put it on, passing it to me.
“Lean your head over the back of the chair.” I grabbed the phone and looked along the top left row of teeth. Half of his first molar was missing.
“What the fuck is going on?” a familiar deep voice bellowed.
