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“You asked me not to kill him.”
I did, and I hope that’s not going to be a mistake. “He’s just a kid,” I say. “It didn’t seem right. We shouldn’t kill any tau we come across. We don’t know if they’re in command of their own bodies.”
“You’re right, but we have to keep ourselves safe too, Jackson. If it comes to them or you… You do what’s needed, okay?”
“Okay,” I agree.
She pauses for a moment before she says, “I don’t understand what is happening.”
“Me neither. It feels like we’ve only been given half the puzzle pieces.”
When she lifts her head, her bottom lip goes between her teeth. “I hate that I can’t remember anything that could help us.”
The desperation in her words makes my stomach twist. I don’t want her to feel responsible for anything, let alone this. Part of me also thinks her not remembering anything is a good thing.
I stroke her hair back from her face. “Don’t reopen wounds from the past. You don’t need to go back there to help. We’ll figure it out.”
She remembered some things. When she first came to the Sanctuary, she knew her name was Dove, though it was the name she was given by another captive. She remembered the number on the back of her neck, one undoubtedly given to her by the Order. I’m not sure what else she knows, and I don’t want to push her for answers considering how fragile we both are right now.
“But if it can help?—”
I shake my head, pressing a kiss to her forehead. I want to do so much more, but I won’t push her until she’s ready. “Opening you up to your trauma isn’t a risk I’m willing to take.”
She softens in my arms, and I feel heat spread through me as she clutches me. “I hate the uncertainty, not knowing what we have to do to survive this.”
I hate it too, but we will survive because there is no other choice. The need to make her mine in every way makes my skin itch. I don’t like that we’re not connected.
“I’ll talk to Cade about the mating bond,” I say.
Her brows come together, and I find myself wondering if I’m pushing for something she doesn’t want again, despite her assurances.
“You don’t want me to talk to him?”
She scrunches her face. “It’s not that, Jacks. Your pack hates me.”
“They don’t hate you.”
The roll of her eyes in that bratty way makes my dick feel heavy. I’m hit with the sudden urge to bend her over the back of the couch while my palm rings off her ass.
To be honest, most of the things she does have that same effect on me.
“They don’t trust me. They think I’ve bewitched you.”
I can’t argue with that. That's one way to put it and I don't mind it at all, so I smile as I say, “I don’t care what they think.”
Her exhaled breath is laced with impatience. “To be bonded, we have to be in a pack. It’s alpha magic that creates these bonds. Your pack is never going to accept me.”
Fuck. Why does it feel as if my chest is caving in at her words? “They will.”
“Jackson… We both know that’s not going to happen. Cade distrusts me. He’s never going to allow me into his pack with his mate. Not to mention his brother and cousin.”
“I’ll sort it out,” I promise her. “I’m not letting you go, Dove. You’re mine, and I want that bond. I need to know what you’re feeling, where you are at all times. I need to hear you.”
The words are true. I want to tie her to me in every way imaginable. “I didn’t realize you were so controlling,” she says around a smile
It’s said with humor, but it leaves an unpleasant feeling in me. Dove has been controlled so much I don’t want to be someone else who takes from her without her wanting it.
“You want me to stop?”
