Page 2 of Scars on my Heart


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I was just plating their food when I heard their footsteps scramble down the stairs and into the kitchen. I carried over their bowls and placed their meals down in the front of them.

"Spaghetti?" Noah questioned.

"Yes," I answered. "I am tired. It was easy."

"Ah, Mom, but you promised pizza tonight," Noah cried.

"I know I did. How about we have that tomorrow, okay?" I said, scooping some pasta into my bowl. I grabbed the garlic bread from the oven and placed it in the centre of the table before sitting down across from the boys.

"You promise?" Dylan questioned.

"Yes, I told you, we'd order from the same place I used to get pizza from when I lived here as a young girl."

"You really grew up here?" Noah asked, scooping up a spoon full of noodles and completely missing his mouth, pasta falling down the front of his shirt and onto the floor.

"Yes, I sure did. Do you remember passing by the flower shop when we drove into town?"

Both boys thought for a moment and nodded.

"I grew up in the house behind that. Not too far from here. Willow Valley was smaller then. This house didn’t even exist when I grew up here. It’s grown a lot since I left."

"Why did you leave?" Noah questioned.

"Well, I met your dad at school, and we moved to the city."

"Are we going to go to the same school you went to?" Dylan asked.

I nodded. "Yep. Willow Valley Grade School. You are both going to make lots of friends, and I think you will really like it here. Willow Valley also has lots of town activities. They have the fall fair and winter activities, like skating on the lake and a winter festival."

"I miss Billy," Noah whined. "We were the best of friends. It's not fair we had to move." He dropped his spoon into his bowl and crossed his arms across his little chest, scowling. "Now all I have is my brother."

Once again, I could see the tantrum about to start. Noah was eight. It hadn’t only been a long day for him but for all of us, and the last thing I wanted was for him to act out. I was about to say something when suddenly Noah had spaghetti hanging off his face and head. Dylan burst into laughter as I glanced over at him.

"That is enough. Eat your dinner. Don't throw it at your brother," I scolded.

Just as I finished giving Dylan crap, he now had spaghetti hanging off his face, and Noah let out an infectious giggle. I glanced over at him, ready to yell, but suddenly they both were smiling and laughing, which caused me to laugh.

* * *

The next morning, I stood in the kitchen, unpacking more boxes as both boys played video games in the living room. It was a new house and none of us had slept well last night, so I was trying to keep it a low-key day for all of us. My phone vibrated against the kitchen counter, and I reached for it as I placed the glasses I'd just washed in the cupboard to the left of the sink. I opened my email and was surprised to see a response from the job I'd applied for before bed last night. I skimmed the email and smiled to myself.

"Boys!" I called.

"What?" they both called back.

"I’ve got some news. I got a job," I said, sitting down behind them on the couch, excited to share this news with them.

"A job?" Dylan questioned.

They had never seen me work. Lucas and I had been fortunate that he'd had a good job that enabled me to stay home with them. I'd done my best to maintain that the last couple of years, but there had been some events that had eaten into our savings. The sale of the house had fortunately paid for this one, and it gave us a bit of a cushion which I’d been grateful for. The life insurance money that Lucas had, I’d decided I wanted to use for the boys’ education, which meant I’d had no choice but to get a job.

"Does that mean you won't be home much?" Noah asked, dropping his controller to the ground, on the verge of another breakdown.

"Well, it means that I will work outside of the home, just like Daddy used to. However, the hours will coincide with school once you start, so you won't notice as much. However, there will be times during the summer that you will be home here with a sitter and not with me," I said, trying hard not to break down in tears as their sad eyes looked up at me. They'd seen me cry enough in the past year, and I'd vowed to myself to be stronger for them, especially now that we had moved.

"Where are you going to be working?"

I patted the cushions on the couch next to me and waited for them both to sit down beside me. "Well, there is a small bookstore in town here, run by a woman I used to go to school with. She will be, or I should say is starting a young readers program, and with my volunteer hours that I accumulated at the young readers’ program at the library back home, she was pleased to offer me the job. That means you both will get all the books you want to read, you'll get to meet new people, and while you do that, I will make money to support us."

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