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Suddenly, the weight of the torch I’ve carried for him all semester crushes me. It’s too much to carry in silence anymore, but I’m afraid to give it a voice.
My laughter fades and is replaced by a growing sense of terror at admitting how I feel. I know now that he has feelings for me, so why is this so hard?
Because admitting it makes it real.
It’s a sobering thought, even if I’m not exactly sober.
“I wrote you off as just a sexy jock the first time we met,” I say slowly. “But then I got to know you, and...” I glance down at my feet, gathering my courage. “You flipped the script. I got to know a funny, sweet, caring, and incredibly smart guy. You showed me who you really are, and I haven’t stopped falling for you since.”
The corner of his mouth kicks up a little. “Holland, you would make an amazing poker player, because I honestly had no idea.”
“I promise you, Eli, you’re theonlyguy I want to kiss me. The only one I want to touch me.”
He sucks in a sharp breath as his eyes lock with mine. “Yeah?”
“Yes.”
He threads his hands through my hair again and gently touches his forehead to mine. “Is it okay if I do all those things right now?”
“Please,” I whisper.
The word is barely out of my mouth when Eli groans my name and captures my mouth with his own.
The moment his lips touch mine, I go instantly weak. I tug him up off of the floor, and his strong arms wrap around me as he gently leans me back on the bed, then lifts his head to look at me.
His eyes grow hooded as he sweeps his gaze over my face and down along my body.
“I haven’t been able to keep my eyes off of you all night,” he says, running his fingers down along a lock of my hair. “I wanted this. You, pressed up against me like this.”
Hearing him say those words muddles my already muddled brain. It’s just like in my fantasies, but a million times better. Especially when I hear it in that low, smoky voice of his.
“Do you know how many times I’ve thought about kissing you?” he asks, brushing his lips against the outside of my ear. “Do you have any idea how hard it was for me to behave?”
I slide my hands down over his shoulders as his fingers skim along my waist. His thumbs rub circles over my hot skin, the sweet gentle touch driving me crazy.
“I don’t want you to behave anymore,” I murmur.
His mouth comes down on mine again, and this time, I get utterly lost. His kisses are devastating in the very best way. Soft and gentle. Deep and searching. Sweet and easy. He doesn’t stop, not for one minute, and the whole thing is so damned sexy that my stomach will not stop fluttering.
Suddenly, I’m desperate to have my hands on his body. I need to feel his skin against my fingertips. I want to touch every inch of him. I dip my fingers underneath his t-shirt, running my palms over his taut, muscled stomach and up to his chest.
We only stop kissing long enough for me to help him tug his shirt up and off, and then we’re right back at it. I run my hands all over his upper body—his back, his chest, and down along his arms—reveling in his strength.
He breaks our kiss and gazes down at me, his eyes heavy-lidded and filled with desire. “When do I get my turn to touch you?” He skims a hand under my shirt and over my belly, making me tremble.
“Now,” I whisper. I tug my t-shirt over my head, leaving me clad in just my bra.
It’s not super sexy—it’s just a plain white bra edged with lace, but it’s pretty and fits well. For a moment, I feel a twinge of insecurity, wishing that I filled it out better, but judging by how Eli’s looking at me right now, he doesn’t mind.
He makes a sexy noise deep in his throat, then traces the lace edging with one finger before slowly cupping one breast.
“So pretty,” he murmurs. “So fucking pretty.” He places kisses along my shoulder and finds the front clasp of the bra, unhooking it easily.
Eli takes his time removing it, placing one big hand along my back as he slides a strap down over my shoulder, kissing all along my neck as he goes. Then he slides the other strap down, and slowly pulls it off.
A shallow breath escapes his lips as he stares down at me, naked and bared to him. I’m desperate to feel his mouth on me but afraid to move, fearing it will break the moment.
Eli places his hand over my left breast, tracing his fingers over my skin like I’m breakable, then brushes his thumb over my nipple.
