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I took a deep breath and waited for him to realize no punchline was coming.

“Since when?” he asked finally.

“I’m not sure.”

“Quinn.”

“Sophomore year of college.”

“What the fuck?” he said again. “Did Tanner put you up to this?”

“Okay, so maybe I haven’t loved her since then, but after she moved in—”

“Oh my god, you’re serious.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier,” I said, knowing it was a lie as soon as it came out of my mouth. “Actually, that’s not true. I’ve loved every second of living with her, and I never want her to move out.”

“Fucking hell! You told me the only thing you’d ever love was your own reflection.”

“I was wrong.”

“Have you told Maddy this?” he asked, his voice strained.

“Yeah. I told her last night.”

“What did she say?!”

I recalled her rosy cheeks. If only I could fuck away the hurt I caused her the last two weeks.

“What did she say?!” he shouted.

“Nothing. I mean, I like to think she was pleasantly surprised, but she’d had a few drinks so I sent her to bed.”

“Alone?”

“Yes, alone. Jesus.”

He exhaled so hard I swear the air pressure in Chicago changed. “Wait—have you guys…?”

Please don’t fucking ask this, bro. You do not want to know.

“Dammit, Quinn!” he said, jumping to his own conclusions. “In whose bed?”

I grimaced and scratched the back of my head.

“You are the fucking worst.”

“Shame I can’t say the same about your sister,” I said, unable to help myself. “Sorry, that was a dick thing to say. It’s not like that, I swear. I really care about her.”

“If you were here right now, I would’ve started strangling you before that apology.”

Suddenly, I was feeling quite clever that I decided to break the news over the phone. “I should’ve told you sooner.”

“No shit, Sherlock.”

“I didn’t think it was worth mentioning until I knew it was serious.”

“Now it’s serious?! I thought she was seeing someone?”

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