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I brush my teeth again.
I puke again.
I wait to make sure it’s all out and I puke again before finally brushing my teeth and getting dressed. I head down to the kitchen to get Heather’s breakfast ready. I can hear her puttering around in her room getting ready so I hurry a little. I’m running later than usual and I don’t want to throw her routine out of balance. I decide to spoil her with pop tarts for breakfast. She’s excited when she sees it and beams at me as she eats. I give her a wry smile and try my best to drink my coffee without bringing it up for a second round.
As soon as Heather is off to school I groan loudly, find my sunglasses, and head towards work. The noise from the cars and other pedestrians is enough to turn my head and I have a pounding headache by the time I reach the studio.
Diesel sees me come in, chuckles, and scrounges in his counter drawer before coming over to my booth with headache tablets.
“You are a God,” I comment.
“You must have been seriously drunk,” he responds as I take four tablets quickly. I’m about to swallow them dry when he holds out an energy drink. I grin and open it, drinking the tablets down and smacking my lips.
“Thanks D, you are seriously my hero today.”
“No problem,” he says before going back to his booth.
I set my phone on its dock, turning on some low key oldies that won’t burn my brain before I settle down to finish a design for a customer. Thank God this one’s only for tomorrow; I hopefully won’t get any customers today because I don’t actually think my hands will be steady enough.
The door jingles and Tintin walks in, talking on his cell phone. He waves to me as he walks into his booth and I wave back. I’m about to start concentrating when the door opens again and I glance at it.
Lyra.
She’s in a pair of tight jeans and a crop top, and those cute yellow sneakers she loves so much. Her hair is tied in a high ponytail and she is wearing a little bit of make-up. Not my style at all, and yet, my heart aches as I see her. I would never think anyone dressed like that would be attractive and yet, feelings stir inside of me. Maybe it’s because I can’t have her now, that I want her. Maybe it’s because I feel like I lost out or should have made my move.
No.
It washes over me like a cold shower and I’m instantly repelled by Lyra. It’s because she did what Bernadine did to me. She gave me feelings, and then fucked someone else she barely knew. My wife had been our entire life, our family had been picture perfect, and then she started chatting to some guy on social media, someone she didn’t know in real life, and then she left Heather and me for this guy, in another country, who she had never met, and mailed me the divorce papers.
Now Lyra had made me believe there was something, especially yesterday, with her little dress and her lack of underwear, and then boom, some other guy has his hands on her. I’m not jealous, it’s not that I didn’t make a move, it’s that women are whores and I need to make sure Heather is raised better or she’ll be just like that.
Suddenly I don’t want Heather anywhere near Lyra and I know that’s going to be difficult, because Heather really liked Lyra and it would be hard to explain to her why I don’t want her around that woman anymore.
I’m brought out of my thoughts when a hand clicks in front of me, “JJ?”
“What?” I snap at Lyra, who has moved to stand right in front of me.
“I’m talking to you,” she says, frowning, “And you’re just staring at me.”
“Do you want something?”
“I wanted to talk.”
“No,” I say, looking up at her. No, fuck that, I stand up and look down at her, asserting my dominance. “I don’t want to talk to you unless it is strictly work related. Do you want to discuss work, Lyra?” I asked venomously.
Lyra shakes her head and I can see she feels slighted, but I don’t give one flying fuck about what she feels. She turns and walks away, and I sit back down, turning back to my work. As far as I’m concerned, Lyra is now dead to me.
It hasn’t been easy forcing Heather to stay away from Lyra. Eventually, Lyra simply told her that they could no longer hang out; I assume she did this because she realized I didn’t want my child near her anymore. Heather was very upset, but I know with time, she’ll get over it.
She got over her mother leaving, and that was far worse.
To be honest, it was the least that Lyra could do after everything that had happened.
I’ve been looking at the coast for a stand where I can open my own shop. I want to get away from all the bitter memories that this place holds, all the anger and hatred and betrayal, and I want to have a fresh start with Heather. Once I have found the perfect place, I will give Lyra my notice and get ready to move my daughter to her new life.
And my new life.
I know now I don’t want to find anyone to be with, I just want a peaceful life where I can raise my daughter to be a proper woman, with morals and values, who won’t break a guy’s heart selfishly or lead him on. Someone a guy can depend on when things get tough.
