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“Okay. Here’s how this is going to go. Since I’m ninety-nine-point-nine percent sure Gordon is the same guy from your neighbor’s surveillance footage, neither you nor Savannah will go anywhere alone.” Ian glanced at the other men assembled. “From here on out, nobody steps foot outside, at least not without an armed escort. We’re locking this place up tighter than a virgin’s ass. Got it?”
“When are your guys coming to the cabin?” Joshua asked, tension rolling off his frame.
“Tomorrow morning. They’re bringing provisions to last till…whenever,” Ian explained.
“I’m going to go grab a nap. I’ll take the first watch,” Drake announced with a grim nod. “Keep a plate of dinner warming in the oven for me, will you?”
“Will do,” Nick assured him.
“Okay, for now everyone go about your business and try to relax. We need to stay frosty but not to the point of being ready for a guest shot on Wild Kingdom. Try to think of this as a vacation.”
“With deadly weapons,” I mumbled, trying to keep it together and not uncoil like a damn spring.
“Yeah,” Ian chuckled. “Keep your weapons handy. I’m going to get in touch with James. If we’re lucky, Chicago PD will have both Walker and Tideway locked up before dinner is over.”
I didn’t share Ian’s confidence. The level of anxiety thickening the air only increased my fears. Rubbing the tight muscles at the back of my neck, my temples throbbed with a massive headache.
“We still need to unpack,” I reminded Joshua, anxious to get away from the oppressive weight squeezing in on me.
“I’ll take care of it. You need to lie down for a bit and rest.” He softly smiled. “Come on.”
“Let me know if you need anything, okay?” Sanna asked as I bent and kissed her cheek on the way out the door.
“You know I will, sis. All I need is for you to relax, too. Okay?”
The confident nod she gave me didn’t mask the fear in her eyes.
Once inside our room, Joshua sat on the edge of the bed. Tugging me onto his lap, he smoothed a hand over my hair. “How are you holding up?”
Instinctively, I wanted to say ‘fine’, but we both knew it would be a lie. “I’m okay at the moment. Not sure how I’ll be five minutes or five seconds from now. How about you?”
“Well, this isn’t how I normally spend my days. The pay’s lousy.” He cracked a smile. “But the fringe benefits are spectacular.”
Gliding his capable fingers into my hair, he gripped my mane before pulling me to his lips. Dominant to the nth degree, his move pulverized the capable ground beneath my feet and sent my sub soaring. The sudden change of control sent me pitching and yawing. Like a ship lost in a blinding squall, I couldn’t find my emotional balance.
Tensing, I tore from his kiss and reached back, clasping his wrist. “Wait.”
“Mellie, I can’t cordon off the Dominant in me. I can restrain some of it, but I can’t just shut it off. You can’t expect me to be something I’m not.”
“You can’t expect the same from me,” I countered.
“No, but I’m not wired to submit to you or anyone else.”
No. Joshua’s DNA wasn’t structured to sit passively by and/or cater to someone else’s demands. By asking him to take my independence head on, without a feather of opposition, I was really asking him to submit to me.
I issued a heavy sigh and rubbed my pounding forehead.
“We’ve discussed this, little one. Use that internal armor of yours as much as you need to and if you have to toss on your Domme hat, then do it. I’ve already promised to stick by your side, and that’s what I intend to do. By. Your. Side. I won’t kneel at your feet. And I won’t try to stifle my natural urges, either. I need you to realize that I’m willing to deflect all that beautiful tenacity you toss my way, because I want you to feel secure. Whatever it takes. Trust me. There’ll come a time when I’ll command you out of your comfort zone, but it’s definitely not now.”
Dammit. The man was understanding to a fault. It was one of the things I admired most about him, until now. I didn’t want him being tolerant or supportive. I wanted to argue and cuss and fight, to slam a stake in the ground and draw a safe perimeter around me.
You want to throw a fit like a five-year-old because he’s not letting you have your way. The man only knows how to nurture in a specific way…Dominance. You can’t tell him to stop who and what he is any more than you can tell him to stop breathing. Instead of fighting his comfort, take it. You’re going to need it before this shit is through.
Leaning in, he gave me a tender kiss, conveying he understood my agitation. Scooping me into his arms like a child, Joshua stood and turned, settling onto the bed.
“Close your eyes and rest. I’ll join you as soon as I unpack.” I opened my mouth with an offer to help poised on my tongue, but he pressed his finger to my lips. “Don’t argue with me about this. Save it for the important stuff.”
I shot him a derisive smirk, then nodded in resignation. Closing my eyes, I listened as he moved around the room. Comforted simply by his presence, I wrapped it around me like a blanket and drifted to sleep.
