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And I wanted him to know me without the knowledge that we were having a baby. Besides, I wanted to be beyond the first trimester when I told him. Why throw a hand grenade into his life if, God forbid, I lost the baby to a miscarriage? But mostly I didn’t want him to feel obligated to like me. Or worse, determined to be all business to keep things from getting messy.
This whole long month I had been feeling that maybe I had overreacted when I had thrown my burger and stomped off at the cabin. It had been a culmination of a very emotional week for me. A week that had shattered my world.
But here I was, with a whole new world, and Christian was standing in my living room. I moved over to the French doors and opened them so we could step into the garden. “I need to learn more about gardening. The previous owner left me something really beautiful and I don’t want to let it go to ruin.” I stepped out onto the stone patio, where the foliage was abundant and blooming.
“Wow.” Christian paused beside me. “This is really beautiful. Maybe you should hire a professional, because this is next-level gardening.”
“I don’t have the money to hire a professional,” I said, amused. “I’m a waitress, remember? My tips aren’t that awesome. Even when I find a full-time job I don’t think I can afford someone.” Especially not with day care expenses. “I’m going to have to learn at least a little about how to take care of it. But I think it will be fun.”
“I think if you decide that’s what you’re going to do, you’ll be amazing at it. You’re kind of a powerhouse, Bella.”
That made me feel unexpectedly emotional. “Really?” I turned to him, heart full. “That’s honestly one of the best compliments I’ve ever gotten, Christian.”
His eyes were warm. “It’s true. You’re amazing.”
He was going to kiss me and I wanted nothing more. I leaned toward him. He covered my mouth with his and I sighed into the most delicious kiss I think I’ve ever received. He made love to me with his tongue and his lips. I went on my tiptoes to get closer, brushing my chest against his. He made a sound in the back of his throat but he pulled away. I gave him a smile.
“Is that why you asked me out?”
“So I could kiss you?”
“No, because I’m amazing?” I wiped my bottom lip and looked at him under my lashes.
“Yes, definitely. Also, because I can’t stand watching guys hit on you night after night. I figured if it was bothering me that much there must be a reason.” He eyed me up and down. “You look so gorgeous right now, by the way. Just in case you didn’t know.” His finger came out and slid along the neckline of my dress. “I think the air in Maine agrees with you.”
I swatted his hand. “Down, boy. If we’re going to date, you can’t just touch me like that. That is not first-date behavior.” Maybe a little ass-backward, given that I was pregnant by him, but if we were going to do this right, we’d have to stay rational and not let lust rule the day. Because lust for each other we had in spades. It was written all over his face.
Christian frowned. “That makes no sense. I have eaten your pussy, Bella. I can’t put one little finger on your skin, above your dress?”
“Oh my God! You can’t just say that out loud.” I wasn’t sure if I was more embarrassed or more turned on. I was pretty sure it was the latter.
My discomfort always seemed to amuse him. “I just did. Because it’s true.”
“But this is a first date,” I insisted.
“You’re lucky you’re adorable because this is just madness.”
That made me laugh. “That’s a little dramatic.”
“What’s dramatic is you giving me blue balls.” He smiled slyly. “Please? Can I pretty please go down on you?” His finger brushed over my nipple.
It was very tempting. He was so hot and sexy. And the way he was looking at me was just setting my insides on fire. “It’s three dates before sex should be introduced in a relationship.”
“Who the fuck made these rules?” Christian shook his head. “Fine. I’ll be good. Even though not only have I eaten your pussy, you have sucked my cock while I was driving. But we’ll pretend that didn’t happen. For now. Unless I can convince you otherwise.”
The longer we stayed in this house the more likely he could convince me to do all kinds of things. The only thing saving me right now was there was no couch in the living room and I hadn’t shown him the bedroom. If he tumbled me onto that air mattress I was temporarily using, it was over. “Let’s just go to dinner.”
“Whatever you say, princess.”
Even though Christian spent a lot of time sending me smoldering looks, which was highly flattering, we did have easy conversation. He was telling me about fishing with his brothers as a kid. “That’s my biggest regret, you know,” he said. “I mean, people can say whatever they want about my family, and maybe I’ve always sucked at showing it, but I do love my siblings. Cain was my best friend and I ruined that.”
I slid my hand across the table and over his. “Maybe things will change once Cain is out of rehab. I think it’s really sweet that he and Sophie are making a go of their relationship.”
“I never thought I’d see the day, to be honest. For him to be sober or serious about a girl, but your sister got under his skin.” Christian raised his glass of bourbon. “I know the feeling. There’s something about you Bigelow girls. We’re putty in your hands.”
He was being really charming and I warned myself not to get swept away. But it was already happening. “Ditto for you Jordan brothers.”
Christian gave me a wink. “Are you sure you don’t want a glass of wine?” he asked. “Your water looks so sad.”
