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Now.
No.
Now! Just say it and be done!
It’ll change things forever.
That ship has sailed. You’re hugging the guy’s T-shirt. Just do it!
I go to turn over, but then Cole stands up to do his nighttime routine in the bathroom.
No problem, I’ll wait up for him.
But then when he walks back out a few minutes later, he lies down, and his lamp cuts off.
Now the room is good and dark.
Good going ... you waited too long, and now it’s too late.
I listen to him getting comfortable.
“Night, Paige.”
“Night,” I reply lamely.
No.NO!
A few minutes pass—enough time for me to sufficiently berate myself for not being braver—and then I speak up.
“Psst ... Cole? Are you awake?”
“What?”
He sounds groggy, like maybe he was asleep and I woke him up.
“No. Never mind. Go to sleep.”
I roll over and face the window.
“Now you have to say it. Don’t leave me hanging or I won’t be able to sleep.”
“It’s okay, forget it.”
He takes ahold of my arm in the dark and rolls me over, flat onto my back.“What?”
“You’re not tired?”
“You’ve been acting weird and quiet for the last few hours. Please, for the love of god—”
“Okay ... well, I have a question I’ve been wondering about for a while, actually.”
“What’s it about?”
“Us.”
There’s a long delay, and then he replies, “Am I going to have to pry it out of you, or are you going to get on with it?”
“I’ll get on with it. Yeah ... I can. Let me just—”
