AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Lucy should have waited.
Fuck. I don’t want to think about her. She left.
I lift the bottle to my mouth again and again until not even a drop comes out.
I hold myself to the vanity as I step out of the shower and stumble into the bedroom.
Fuck the towel, I sit on the bed and grab the bottle of pills on my nightstand, drop a few in my hand, and pop them.
My brain won’t shut up.
Lucy was an angel, I was a fucking moron for leaving her behind. For leaving her at all.
Stop fucking thinking about her? She’s much better than you, you loser.
My blurry eyes scan the room and lock on three more bottles. After a couple of attempts, I am finally able to stand and stumble over to the dresser and grab one, before going back to bed.
The alcohol and pills have become a necessity. Without them, there is no way my brain shuts up enough for me to get a shut eye.
Tonight, after seeing Lucy again, my brain is going double time.
We were something back then. She was my ultimate supporter, always there for me in any way I needed her.
Fuck, I was a selfish prick back then. I threw away the best thing of my life for a shiny new life.
The alcohol before, during, and after the shows, and all the women throwing themselves at me, it was easy finding excuses not to call her. Because she’d be asleep, because she’d be at work, because I was tired, because I was busy.
And the more time went by, the harder it got to just pick up the phone and hear her voice.
Before I was asked to join the band, giving me the big break I needed to become the rockstar I always wanted to be, I thought Lucy was it for me. My forever girl.
I had plans for us. A house, babies. Even a dog or two if she wanted. The whole nine yards.
Until this day, she is the only woman I have ever loved.
Seeing her tonight reminded me of that. My heart sand and cried at the same time for having her there, but knowing she was no longer my Lucy.
We are different people now.
And that was more than clear when she left me tonight.
I guess time did its job and erased me from her heart.
Who can blame her?
At any given time over four fucking years, I could have called, texted, sent a fucking email to her.
I pretended to be busy with the music, performing, and all the fucking touring.
She must hate me.
I kind of hate me too.
***
Beep. Beep. Beep.
What the fuck is that?
