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“There’s nothing to discuss. We’re taking things slowly. For our daughter’s sake.” She looks away from me, trying to keep an eye on Aurora. “Ares is looking well. Why did you look like death warmed over when I saw you at the concert, and he looks so healthy?”
“There is a lot I’ve had to sacrifice for the band, and I tried to protect him as much as I could, even if he doesn’t know the half of it.”
“Well, you are definitely looking better. But it’s nice seeing him again. I’ve missed him.”
A wave of sadness rushes through me. “Us signing up for that band was the worst thing that ever happened to you, wasn’t it? You were left all alone to raise Aurora and couldn’t even confide in your best friend. And then you had to let him go, like you let me go. So we could live our dream. All the while, you were sacrificing so much. I’m really sorry for all the hurt I caused you.”
“It was my choice to let you go. You deserved to grow and spread your wings.” She pulls her eyes from him to look at me. “I’m sorry I kept her from you for all this time. It wasn’t to punish you or hurt you or anything like that. I really believed I was doing the right thing.”
Even though I know she wants to take it slow, I can’t help but want to kiss her full lips. “Thank you. What do you say we start over with a clean slate? We both made mistakes, and if you can forgive me, I can definitely forgive you.”
“I can. I do forgive you. But for now, I don’t think you and I should be anything more than co-parents to our daughter. You’ll be gone on tour soon enough, and I don’t want to always have to worry about what you’re doing when you’re out on tour. And I’m sure you don’t want to worry about me either.”
Running her hand through my hair, she sighs. “For a while there, I thought you were going to let it go back to its natural color. But black looks good on you too.”
Taking her by the wrist, I pull her hand away from my hair, because it’s driving me crazy, and she’s sending mixed signals. “You should know that I really never stopped thinking of you as my girl.”
“Then why did you screw around with all those other women?”
“That was the alcohol. The label required me to play a role and the only way I could was drowning myself in booze until I blacked out. I have no memory of any of the other women, and yet, I was never able to forget a single second I spent with you.” I look into her eyes, willing her to believe because I mean every word I say. “But from now on, I’d like to present myself differently. I’d like to be me again. The old me, I mean.”
Rolling her eyes at me, she sighs. “Like the groupies will care that you’re trying to be different, Apollo. All they care about is getting a piece of the rockstar, so they can brag about it to whoever will listen.”
She’s not wrong. “I’m going to change all that, though. You’ll see. You just wait until we go back out on the road and watch what happens.”
Somehow, I have to prove her wrong. I’m not sure how I’ll do it, but when I want something, I make it happen.
“I can’t watch what happens.” She hugs herself over her chest, cocking her head as she looks at me with a no-nonsense expression. “I won’t be there.”
“If you’re with me, you can.” I wait for her reaction to an idea I have been working on.
“With you?” Stunned, her mouth hangs slightly ajar.
Just as I’m about to close it for her, my brother’s voice comes, “Hey, Daddy, your little girl wants you to help her pick out an outfit for her bear.” Ares comes over and Aurora asks me to pick her up, moving from his arms to mine.
“You have the bestest taste in clothes ever, Daddy.”
I smile at her and kiss her head before looking at Lucy one more time. We will talk about this again, but now my little birdie needs me.
“Okay, let’s get him the best outfit ever, shall we?”
“Yes.” She jumps in my arms as I walk her to the clothes display, Lucy and Ares following close behind.
“Hey, Lucy.”
“Hi, Ares.”
I can tell they are uncomfortable, but I just know both of them need this friendship back.
“So, a little girl, huh?”
I move further away with my daughter, and I can’t hear the rest of the conversation, but at least they are talking to each other. That’s a start, right?
When after a few minutes, Lucy laughs, my chest warms at the sound even as my whole body deflates.
Why can’t it be that way with me? Why can’t Lucy just slip right back to where we were back then, the way she seems to have with my brother?
But maybe Lucy’s right, though.
