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As I walked closer, he spotted me and something came over his eyes. They became warmer, relaxed, and filled with what I hoped was love.
“Hey, beautiful,” he said as he stood to kiss my cheek.
“Hi, handsome,” I replied, kissing him back while filling my lungs with the scent uniquely his.
As we sat down, the waitress brought over our coffees. Brett has always ordered my coffee.
“You look relaxed. Did you get some last night?” Brett said as he winked playfully.
Oh I got some all right. I smiled at him. “I’m very relaxed. What’s going on with you?”
“Can I take your order, Sir?” the waitress interrupted.
“I’ll have the burger, please.”
“Of course.” The waitress wrote it down in her notepad. “And for you?” They both looked at me smiling.
I quickly scanned the menu. “Could I have the haloumi wrap, please?”
The waitress jotted down my order before taking our menus.
It’s now or never…
“Work has been really busy,” Brett started to say.
He spoke with his hands and I couldn’t help but imagine those fingers on me. In me. Remembering the night before, and what those fingers had done to me— imaginary or not— my panties grew wet. I really had to tell him. I couldn’t go on like this. This one-sided love was toxic and I deserved better. I wanted him to love me too, and for us to start being together in more than a friendship way. Only a week before, my mom even said the same thing.
“What are you and Brett doing?” She’d said it like we were a couple. We did everything together. It made sense that we’d be together.
I just hoped he felt the same way.
“Earth to Sam.” Brett waved a hand in front of my face. “Where’d you go?”
Shit. I hadn’t been paying attention.
“Sorry, Brett. Was just thinking.” I smiled sheepishly. Hopefully my thoughts hadn’t been too obvious.
“Who was on your mind?” He smirked.
“What do you mean?” I tried to give myself some more time before coming clean. Feigning innocence always worked in the past; I hoped it helped me this time.
“You’re relaxed. You’re zoning out on me. So, you obviously got some last night. Who’s the lucky guy?”
I took a deep breath. It was time. But dammit, I wasn’t ready.
“Can we talk about it later?” Fuck. I was such a chicken. I was just prolonging the inevitable.
“Sure. You know you can talk to me about anything, right? You know I love you?”
“I know, and I love you.” If only he knew how much I meant those words. “Okay…” I couldn’t prolong it any more. “I was thinking about you.” I didn’t look him in the eyes. Instead, I stared at the cement on the floor, hoping it would open up and swallow me whole.
“What about me?” Curiosity filled his voice.
“I was thinking that I love you.” I bit my bottom lip. A sure sign I was nervous.
“I love you too, but what about me?” He placed his hand over mine. His warmth and strength seeped into me. Turning my hand over I entwined our fingers. He rubbed his thumb over my knuckles.
It’s now or never.
