Page 17 of The Hacker's Heart

“Andy bought everything,” he said, that same uneasy feeling he had at the time returning. “He said it was part of Danny’s present. That he wanted Danny to have a good time and the clothes were part of it but he wouldn’t elaborate until we got to the hotel.”

“And did he?”

Thomas looked down again. “Not right away,” he said softly. “We hung out around the mall for another hour then headed to the hotel after Sean said he had left. All of our things were already put into the rooms. There were only four beds but Mark and Kevin shrugged it off by saying they’d be sleeping in the king together. They live together anyway so I guess it doesn’t bother them. My stuff was in a room with two twin beds with Danny’s bag so I guess that was the plan but no one really discussed it after that. I guess it was after that that Andy got quiet again and stopped pretending to talk at me. He went into the room his stuff was in and handed Danny an envelope. I thought it was a birthday card but then Danny pulled out four ID’s.” Setting the mug on the ground, he reached under the blanket and pulled out the thin card from his back pocket, holding it out to Seong.

The hacker took the card and frowned as he turned it in his hands, studying the details and holding it up towards the light. “This is an expensive fake,” he said after a few moments, holding it closer to study the details of Thomas’s face on the card. “Very expensive. You said you were invited to this just this week?”

Thomas nodded, both relieved and anxious that he was right for thinking the same thing about the fake. Finnegan’s crew didn’t really do fraud crime where faking an ID or papers were necessary, but Jake and some of the other Clovers had shown Thomas ways of spotting forgeries. The ID Andy had gotten was almost an exact match for Thomas’s real one; the only difference is his birth year made him twenty-one.

Seong continued to frown, a crease forming in his brow as his already narrow eyes narrowed further at the fake. He passed it back to Thomas. “Keep going. What happened next?”

Thomas took the ID back, looking down at his own face from about a year before. “Danny started freaking out at first. It was like… like the idea of having something that could break the law bothered him. But then Andy started talking about going to the club and to have some real adult fun and… Everyone seemed to change their tune.” He glanced at Seong. “I didn’t want anything to do with it. For starters I’m still on probation technically even if they’re investigating the DA and the cop now. But… I didn’t like any of this. Something felt… wrong.” He looked back down, sighing through his nose. “I thought about calling my aunts to come get me but if I had-”

“They might have asked questions and contacted O’Hare or Danny’s brother,” Seong said, sighing as well.

Thomas nodded as he looked around the room. He was a little surprised how normal Seong’s apartment looked. Besides the expensive TV and consoles, it wasn’t that different from Thomas’s aunts’ apartment. They even had the same bench next to the door to take off shoes before entering. “I’d already caused a fight between Andy and Danny so I just… stayed quiet. I’m good at that.”

Seong’s hand was back on his head, the weight comforting. “When did you get to the club? Do you remember?”

“Yes,” Thomas said, nodding. “It was around nine. We had to wait for the pizza then my aunts texted me and everyone thought it was perfect to show we were exactly where we were supposed to be.” He swallowed, hating that he had been convinced to lie them once again. By Andy no less. Dread filled him as he looked back around to Seong. “Did you call-”

Seong gave him a half smile that was both reassuring and filled Thomas with a different kind of guilt. “You begged me not to tell them last night,” he said, his hand moving down to Thomas’s neck and resting there. “You said you couldn’t worry them again. I didn’t contact them. But they will have to learn about all of this, Thomas.”

Thomas was sure Seong could feel Thomas’s heart pounding against his throat. Thomas wasn’t sure anymore if it was the idea of Ceri and Jessi making those faces again or the warm palm against his neck that was making it race.

“But,” he went on, “I can be there when it’s time to tell them. If you want me there.” His smile widened a bit more. “You don’t have to decide that now. Keep telling me what you remember. No trouble getting into the club?”

Thomas found it very hard to look away from the way Seong’s lips moved as he smiled. He had such a nice smile, kind, innocent. He set off open season, a little voice in his head reminded him and he swallowed.

Seong was not innocent. He was a criminal, a made man, someone who indirectly caused the deaths of dozens of people at least.

Fuck if he doesn’t make it hard to remember that, Thomas thought bitterly, forcing himself to remember what happened next. “No,” he said slowly. “The bouncer did take longer with Andy’s and Danny’s ID but, well, Andy doesn’t really look like he’s nineteen let alone twenty-two and Danny was stopped because they gave him an extra stamp for it being his birthday. I guess you get a free shot if it’s your birthday?”

Seong nodded to confirm and waved at him to keep talking.

Thomas’s head throbbed as he tried to remember what happened next. The memory of the lights and music and bodies all pulsing around him made him want to crawl out of his skin.

“One step at a time, Thomas,” Seong said gently. “Close your eyes.”

Thomas glanced at him then did what he was told, the darkness seeming to help his headache. Seong’s hand was still warm on his neck and he wondered what it would feel like if it moved lower- His eyes shot open again and he stared at Seong in horror, a disjointed memory of men making sounds he had only heard from his computer suddenly invading his mind. “D-did we-” he stammered, glancing at the blanket covering him.

“No,” Seong said quickly, his hand pulling away like he had been burned. “No, no. We did not do anything. Absolutely not.”

Thomas didn’t know if he was relieved or rejected by Seong’s answer. He just knew that he wanted Seong to put his hand back where it had been. Worse, he knew he shouldn’t want that. Slowly, he shrank back into the couch, pulling the blanket over his head to hide. Childish, the same voice in his head said apathetically. You are like a child. Of course he doesn’t want you.

“Thomas,” Seong said gently. “Come out of there.”

“I live here now,” Thomas said automatically and groaned, curling his legs towards his chest to make himself smaller. These are the worst pants. Why does anyone want to wear pants that could be a second skin?

Seong laughed softly and tugged at the blanket. “Unfortunately, I am going to have to evict you from the blanket cocoon.” He didn’t pull hard but Thomas found himself weak against his resistance. “There you are,” he said, giving Thomas another smile. He didn’t touch Thomas’s head again. “Please keep telling me what you remember. You’ve gotten into the club. Danny has a free shot to cash in. Does he do that right away?”

“Y-yes,” Thomas agreed, remembering now. “We went to the bar first and they crossed out the stamp for the shot. Andy wanted everyone to get a shot but I said no. I might have come along but I wasn’t going to get caught with alcohol in my system if we got found out. He started to have a fit about it but everyone else thought it was a good idea for someone to be sober just in case and he shut up.”

“Alright, so they had a shot and you got a soda,” Seong said, nodding. “Then what?”

“Danny wanted to dance,” Thomas said, feeling his face get hot again. “I- I didn’t want to do that. I wanted to leave. It was too loud and too many people. But I knew if I tried to leave it would start another argument so I said I’d stay there while they went onto the dance floor. They tried to protest that but I insisted and I-” He frowned. Had they all left? They must have. He remembered insisting that no one stay behind when they tried to decide who should stay back with him. But he also remembered being uncomfortable after they left. Did he remember that? “I don’t…”

Seong’s hand wrapped around Thomas’s, giving his fingers a squeeze. “Breathe, Thomas.”

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