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Take Your Time
Emily ~ 2010
Remember, I tell myself, this week is about fun, sun, and quality time with the girls.
We’ve been here about an hour and I’m already failing at the mission at hand. As great as the mission sounds, this is the last place I want to be. I just can’t seem to find a way to be here, in the moment, not in my head.
My head is so not a fun place to be right now. My life is complete and utter shit and I would rather be home alone in our tiny little apartment wallowing in my self-induced misery. But I’m here, in San Clemente, for Cami. She’s more than just my BFF. She’s my sister from another mister. We’ve been there for each other through the good and the bad and I’m closer to this fiery little redhead than anyone in my life. I know how much this week means to her, so how could I say no?
I haven’t been able to say no to her since we met on the first day of the 4th grade. She decided that day we would be best friends and we were. Now, here we are at the same college, living as roommates, and of course we’re still best friends. Cami is one of the only people in my life that will tell me the truth even if it hurts. More importantly, she exudes the true meaning of unconditional love. The least I can do is go on vacation with her. I mean that’s what a true friend would do, so here I am. I should be happier to be here, and I feel like such a jerk because I’m not. Who wouldn’t want to be spending a week on the beach in Southern California with her girlfriends? And for free! It’s not like it’s a real sacrifice, now is it?
Snap out of it, you damn Debbie Downer! I yell inside my head.
Besides, we had these plans long before my life took its recent turn. Our good friends, Samantha and Stephanie Crosby, invited us on this trip shortly after the holidays when Steph’s mom and dad, also Sam’s aunt and uncle, gave them a weeklong stay at the Pier Side Inn, here in San Clemente. It’s a two-bedroom suite and instead of them each having their own room they invited the two of us to come along for the ride. Cousins in one room and sisters in the other. It really is perfect. Although, Sam and Steph have no idea what’s going on in my world, so I have to remind myself to fake it and act like everything is just peachy.
I have to admit, this first bar we stopped at is pretty great. It’s comfortable and cool all at the same time. The ceilings are covered with surf boards and NFL banners and the barstools are filled with regulars. Everything about the place, from the wooden Indian statue that greets you at the front door to the old school photos on the walls, just makes the place cool. We had been told that Ole’s Tavern was a fave with the locals and that Taco Tuesdays were a must! It’s Saturday not Tuesday, but we thought we’d start our weeklong adventure with a local stand-out. So far so good and I have a feeling we’ll be back for Taco Tuesday. We lucked out and got the first table on the right near the entrance. The big table looks almost like a kitchen island and the best part is the window seat. The big open seat, that easily fits the four of us, is cushioned and full of throw pillows while the other side of the table has bar stools.
I lucked out and got a seat in the corner of the window. It’s here that I find myself staring out at the beautiful blue sky, hugging my knees to my chest and resting my chin on one of my knees.
What do I do with the mess that is my life?
Watching all of the happy, sun-glassed, tan people driving by in their convertibles or casually walking by in their flip-flops seeming to not have a care in the world is distracting me. I try to forget about my life and sit and wonder where they’re all going. What is it about their lives that has them all looking so damn happy?
I’m so busy playing my own private game of fantasyland that I haven’t been paying attention to all the fun being had around me. I realize this when Cami snaps her fingers in front of my face to get my attention. It’s then that I notice that the other girls are very distracted with the new source of entertainment taking place right next to our table.
When we first walked in, I had heard the whooping and hollering of fun being had in the back of the bar where the pool tables were, but was too deep in my own head to notice that same fun had moved to the foosball table next to us. All that fun comes in the form of three unnaturally hot guys.
I knew with a quick glance that all three were attractive but I couldn’t take my eyes off the one with the dimples. And that laugh! There was something infectious about his laugh that just makes you smile and want to laugh too. Our entire table seems memorized by it. I’m sure to anybody in the bar, looking in our direction, we look like four little school girls about to take their first pony ride.
This man is magnificent.
I finally remember to breathe, but I continue staring at him with a smile on my face while taking inventory of him. I had already noticed the dimples from his side profile but when he looks right at me with those adorable little indents in his cheeks, that perfect smile and holy shit those eyes, I. Am. A. Goner. I wouldn’t say it was the color of his eyes it was just everything about them. Were they green or hazel? I have no idea? I wouldn’t know, because I’m not sure I would know any of the colors of the rainbow at this moment. He is simply beautiful. He must be a little over six feet tall, with short dark brown hair, an olive complexion, the most beautiful pair of lips I have ever seen, and those eyes! He has long, dark eyelashes that any woman would pay good money for and he was just born with them. He is the epitome of tall, dark and handsome.
But there was something different at work here and not just an attraction. There was something familiar about him. I know that I’ve never seen him before, because I would remember him. But there was a connection that shot right through me the moment those magnificent eyes locked on to mine.
Suddenly, I realize he isn’t just looking back at me, but he’s staring at me like we are the only two people in the bar and with a huge smile on his face. Well, shit! Look at me, just sitting here smiling back at him. I know right then and there that he is trouble with a capital T!
Knowing I need to take a moment to break the spell he has me under, I yell over to the girls. “Guys, I’ll be right back.”
“And where do you think you’re going, chica?” Cami asks like she can’t believe I would want to miss any of the show happening in front of us.
“Just the little girls room. I’ll be right back. Promise.”
When I leave the comfort of my throw pillows and window seat, I make a point of not making eye contact with Dimples as I scurry past the foosball table. Once in the bathroom, I turn on the faucet and put my wrists under the flow of the ice cold water to help calm the heat that overtook me the instant he looked at me. I wet a paper towel with cold water and dab it on the back of my neck. Better.
What is wrong with me?
Instant connection and flirting with hot guys is not in my plan. With the crazy that is my life, there is no room for relationships, innocent flirting or a wretched one-night stand. That is not what this week’s about.
After taking a moment to remind myself that flirting isn’t an option, I feel cooled down enough to head back out. But when I pull open the bathroom door, something seems different. It’s quiet. Thank goodness. This must mean Dimples and his crew of hotties have left. Thank God for small miracles.
Making my way back to the table I’m convinced that there are no such things as small miracles. Dimples and his hotties were not only still here, but had pulled up stools and were at our table.
You have got to be kidding me!
So, much for our prime seating and my comfy window seat. This just keeps getting better. Any other time in my life I might have felt differently, but this was the last thing I needed. Shit!
As I approach the table, Dimples immediately stands up and makes way for me to take back my seat in the window. As I scoot by him it’s like there’s a heat coming off of him that I can feel without even touching him, and my stomach flips with excitement. As I sit down he reaches his hand out and says, “Hi, I’m Jonathan. It’s really nice to meet you.”
