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“You love me?” I say quietly but loud enough that he can hear me over the karaoke version of Summer of ’69 that is being brutalized in the background.
“More than I ever thought I could love another person, Gracie,” he says and brings one hand up to lightly rub his thumb over my cheek. “I’m sure to everybody else it’s crazy and fast and I know I’m leaving for nine months and I know you don’t want this, but I can’t help it. I’m in love with you, Emily Grace.”
What do I do in this awful situation? If I tell him I’m in love with him too it will only hurt him more when I don’t try to make this work. If I lie and say I don’t love him that will hurt him too. I just stand there in silence looking down at the ground.
“Shhh . . . I can hear those wheels turning in your mind. Let’s just go back to our friends and have some fun. I didn’t mean to ruin anything, sweetheart. Please don’t let me scare you off or ruin our evening.”
I can’t help it. He’s so endearing and I hate him thinking he has done anything wrong. I stand on my tip toes and whisper in his ear, “You didn’t ruin anything, Georgia. I’m in love with you too. It doesn’t change how this will end, but I love you too, baby.”
As I say the words into his ear his warm, strong arms slowly come around me until I’m engulfed in his embrace and he has lifted me off the ground.
“You have made me the fucking happiest guy on the planet on one hand and are killing me on the other. I am going to choose to focus on the happy right now and we’ll deal with the rest later,” he says putting me on my feet.
“Jonathan . . .”
“No, we will talk about this later. You don’t get to take the woman I love away from me without a conversation, but like I said, that is for another time and not standing here in Knuckleheads listening to bad karaoke.”
With that he takes my hand and leads me back to our friends.
“PDX how did you like our little performance?” Devon asks when we join them at the bar.
Forcing myself out of my head and into the moment, I walk up to Devon with my hand up high and he gives me the high five I am looking for; and Matt does the same after.
“You guys killed it! I was telling Jonathan that I never knew you all had such mad skills.”
I feel Jonathan come up behind me as he wraps his arms around my waist, leans down and rests his chin on my shoulder and says, “Oh you knew I had those skills baby. I think we move together pretty well, don’t you?”
Even though I know nobody else can hear him because it was said into my ear I feel myself turning red. Matt and Devon just look at each other and shake their heads. Trying to move on, I change the subject.
“So Matt, how was your visit with the family? It was so nice of you to let Jonathan borrow Scarlett while they were here.”
“Hey, no problem Emily. Just hearing you call her by her name lets me know that she’s been in good hands,” he says on a wink. “It was a good visit though. My parents and my little brother Danny and I are all really tight so it’s hard to see them go, but nine months really isn’t that long and then we’re pretty much done. Just a couple months back here on base and then home for good. Oh and my parents left me their rental so you and J can keep Scarlett until Monday.”
“That’s so sweet, thanks for letting Jonathan borrow her, but only if you’re sure?”
“Of course I’m sure. J is my brother, what’s mine is his. J and D are both family and there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for either of them. I think I just proved that up there on that stage but seriously, seeing how happy you’ve made him . . . it’s worth driving a Ford Focus a couple more days.”
“Let’s be honest, I make Scarlett look good dude,” Jonathan says as he walks over and gives Matt one of those dude handshakes that they bring in for a man hug. “Thanks again, Shell. I really appreciate it.”
“Who needs a drink?” Sam yells.
Everybody yells out their orders, but the guys insist on buying and head to the other end of the bar to fill them. Jonathan doesn’t leave me without a lingering kiss and a smack to the ass though.
“Start talking little lady! That performance on and off the stage was pretty amazing, and then you guys seemed to be talking pretty serious pretty fast. How did you go from JT, to making out in front of the whole bar, to what seemed like laughter and then some hard core serious faces?” Cami asks.
“You guys, this is getting worse by the minute.”
“Why do you say that sweetie,” Steph asks, rubbing my back.
I feel the tears welling up in my eyes as I look at Steph and Sam but when I look at Cami I just lose it.
“He told me he loved me and that he is in love with me. This is just a shit show,” I say as tears stream down my face.
“Oh Em, that’s so great. Fast, but great. Why is this such a bad thing?” Steph asks while pulling me into her side to comfort me.
I glance at Cami because she’s the only person here who knows what’s going on with me. She promised not to say anything and I know she hasn’t. I can’t tell them what’s going on when I don’t even know for sure myself. Everything is a mess and I haven’t had the time or want to deal with it this week.
Before I get a chance to answer the guys are already on their way back.
