AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I feel my butt leave the mattress as I am bounced into the air. He’s jumped back into bed, thrown the pillow covering my face to the floor and is on top of me. His dimples are out in full force.
“You have just made me the happiest man alive. All this time I have imagined you with other people, or in a relationship with someone else, and it has always made me sick to even think about. To know that nobody else has had what I had last night doesn’t make you a loser. But it does make me happier than you will ever know.”
His lips have now found mine and just as I forget that I need to get up so Ireland doesn’t catch us, my alarm goes off and he pulls his lips from mine. With a shit-eating grin still on his face, he rolls off of me and jumps up from the bed with an extra little spring in his step.
“I’ll go get the coffee started while you jump in the shower.”
He ends his sentence with a smack to my bare ass, pulls on his clothes and leaves the room happier than I recall ever seeing him.
Today has been such a great day, apart for the moment that I saw the hurt that I inflicted flash across Jonathan’s face. I didn’t mean to hurt him, but I am trying to be completely honest with him. The truth is, after a week of playing house, what then? We won’t be having sleepovers every night because I have Ireland. I need to keep things based in reality so that I don’t mess this up again.
The news that I hadn’t been with anybody since our time together in California seemed to get him over my other comment rather quickly. He was like a kid on Christmas and seemed giddy at finding out this little tidbit of information. What I thought would be embarrassing turned out to be just what he needed to hear. I know that it helped to ease his mind, but it wasn’t enough to take away my other comment about wanting this to be our new normal if the intense kiss that he left me with when he dropped me off is any indication. His goodbye kiss almost felt desperate, like he was trying to convey his feelings for me with this one kiss.
As I gather my things, I walk past Officer Blackburn who’s waiting to walk me to the front door of the school where he knows that Jonathan will be waiting. If only Jonathan could be waiting every day. The reality is he will have to go back to work once Mick is back, but I don’t want to think about that right now.
Officer Blackburn does his daily check-in with me as he walks me out. “How’s it going, Emily? Anything new today?”
“Nope, nothing today and if I haven’t said it, thank you. I know that getting stuck on my detail takes you away from your other duties around the school. I hope you aren’t bored to death?”
“Nah, it’s no problem. We’ll get this figured out soon and you can stop having me as your shadow. Until then, it’s no problem at all. You just be sure you tell me everything that could be a threat or even a clue, and we’ll follow up on all of it.”
“I promise,” I assure him.
“Well, here you are. Looks like Kelly is out there waiting for you as usual. You guys have a good afternoon.”
“Thanks. You too, Carter.”
I can see him smile at the fact that I used his first name when most everybody in the department uses last names. Comes with the job, I guess. He’s probably surprised that I even knew his first name.
Carter opens the door for me and I see the new norm that I wish could become my reality. Not just for this week, but every week.
Ireland and Jonathan are waiting for me again, and as per usual my heart skips a beat at the sight. The thought that I may be hurting this amazing man, who is so beautiful inside and out, is not something that I can even fathom. I would be happy spending all of the rest of my days just making him happy, but I have a little girl to think of, and we can’t just move into a relationship like other people do. We have other factors to consider. I still plan on doing whatever I can to make him happy. To let him in. I just hope I’m able to do that as fast as he wants so he doesn’t walk away.
Please don’t walk away…
23
Jonathan
We’re cooking dinner while Ireland sits on one of the barstools at the kitchen island. This little girl is something else. She carries on conversations with us just like she’s an adult and our equal. She’s very mature for her age, and I’m more and more impressed with her every day.
While we cook I can’t help but notice that Emily seems different then she has been the rest of the week. After picking her up at the school, she was the one that reached across the cab of the truck to take my hand in hers, and she didn’t let go until we got out of the truck.
Now, as we move around each other in the kitchen she’s touching me more than before. If she stands next to me she has her hands lightly moving up and down my back or is touching me in some way. I’m not complaining at all, but I do tread lightly as her comment from this morning is still running around my head. I’ll take what she’s giving though.
The three of us seem to work together well, as we navigate our dinner routine smoothly. The only time that anything seems odd is when Emily gets a text that she doesn’t comment on or reply to. I’ve seen her do that once or twice, but she never says anything, and I don’t want to pry. Well, I do want to pry, but I know that she would tell me if she wanted me to know, so I leave it alone for now.
After getting Ireland off to bed, Emily and I are sitting on the couch hand in hand, with her legs on my lap watching TV. At least she seems to be watching. I am blindly staring at the TV while my mind is running a million miles an hour with all of the things I want to say and want to ask her. Next to me, Emily seems unaffected as she laughs along with the show she’s watching. She doesn’t seem to be losing her ever-loving mind like I am.
Thirty minutes later I can’t take it anymore; this feeling of not knowing where we stand. Feeling like we’re in some kind of limbo is too much for me. I mean, I already know she’s mine, but I need her to know that too. Shit, I want the whole world to know it!
I turn my body toward her and she has to move her legs off of me. She tucks them underneath her and we’re both facing each other now. I need to see her eyes for this.
“Gracie…do you only want this to last two more days?”
Silence. She just stares at me. She doesn’t say a word. God, she makes this all so damn hard.
“Because I want more…lots more. I don’t want just another damn week, Em. I want endless weeks. I don’t think I can take another week that just ends…”
