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“Daisy,” Drix warns.
“No it’s okay,” I say to Drix, then turn my attention to Daisy. “Legally, I’m still married, but in here,” I say, pressing a hand against my chest, right over my heart. “I’m not anymore. He lost that right to be my husband the first time he laid hands on me. Before, honestly.”
Daisy nods, her features softening. “I’m sorry for everything you’ve been through. Did he ever hurt…?” Her voice trails off, and I understand what she can’t bring herself to say.
“He never hurt Toby, no. At least not physically, but he also didn’t really love him either. In the short time you’ve known him you two have shown him so much more kindness and affection than Martin managed in the whole of Toby’s short life so far.”
“God, what a dick!” Daisy exclaims, her sweet, friendly nature shadowed with anger as she roughly places her glass of water on the counter. “How could he hurt you like that? How could anyone not love Toby? He’s amazing.”
“He really, really is,” I agree, my throat thickening with tears. “I just wish I’d made different choices. What if he’s damaged in some way? I kept the violence and abuse hidden from him as much as possible, but I just…” I drop my head, trying to control my emotions, feeling so much guilt.
Daisy rounds the kitchen island and pulls me into her embrace. “Hey, don’t you dare blame yourself. Toby is going to be just fine. He has a fantastic mother, and now he has us, okay?”
“Thank you,” I mumble as she pulls back and gives me her own watery smile.
“I can’t imagine how hard this has been for you, and I know Drix has already said this to you, but you can stay here for as long as you need. In the past few days, this house has become more of a home with you both in it. I want you to know that.”
“That means a lot, and I truly, truly appreciate it. You’re good people, I do see that,” I say, flicking my gaze to Drix who’s watching our interaction quietly.
After drawing me in for another quick hug, Daisy steps back. “I’m going to head to bed, I’ve got the day shift tomorrow on reception, and need my beauty sleep. I can drive us both to work?” she offers.
“I’d like that, thank you,” I agree.
“Good. Perhaps you should get some rest too?” she suggests.
“I will. I just want a moment to talk with Drix, if that’s okay?”
“Of course. Goodnight. See you both bright and early!”
“Night, Daise,” Drix says.
I wait until she leaves before taking a seat beside Drix. “I never meant to keep the fact I’m married a secret from you.”
“I know you didn’t,” he replies.
“And I don’t take marriage vows lightly either, but I meant it when I said that he’s no longer my husband, not in any of the ways that count. If I could divorce him, I would, but that would mean letting him know where I am and I can’t do that…” My voice trembles and my body shudders at the thought.
“God, Lia,” Drix exclaims, his voice tight. “I could murder him for what he’s done to you.”
Forcing my head up, I look at him. Baring myself, I say, “I’m so afraid, Drix. I’m so scared he’ll find me, that he’ll hurt us both.”
Drix shakes his head. “Come here,” he says, reaching for me, his strong arms wrapping around me as I stumble from my seat and into his arms. Shifting, he hauls me against his chest, his legs widening so that I can nestle between them. I lean into his hold, realising how much I need this hug.
“I’m sorry,” I mumble against his neck, my lips grazing the warmth of his skin.
On instinct, I wrap my arms around him tighter, my eyes pressing shut as I allow myself this one moment to feel cared for. My body begins to tremble in earnest now as years of fear and sadness are unleashed. It’s as though somewhere deep inside, despite the reservations I still hold, a core part of me understands the safe space Drix has provided me with in this simple gesture of human kindness.
“Never apologise for finding comfort in my arms, Lia,” he whispers against the top of my head, his hands rubbing up and down my back as he holds me.
“Thank you,” I whisper.
“He will never hurt you again, you hear me?” Drix reassures me, the sound of his voice rumbling through his chest.
“You can’t possibly know that.”
“I know that,” he insists, his arms tightening around me. “I swear, I’ll keep you both safe. And you can trust me when I say, I will never hurt you or Toby. I promise.”
Held in the comfort of his arms, I begin to believe that what he says is true.
