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“Well, I wasn’t going to say anything, but since you mentioned it, the host's demeanor could have been nicer. Overall, I would give the hospitality three out of five stars so far, but I’ll wait to do my full review until after dinner,” Lynx quips, grabbing a napkin and placing it in his lap.
Ryker leans over to Lynx. “You should probably start sharpening your claws now.”
Oh my God! We’re gonna die in Hell! Lucifer himself is going to smite us.
I silently thank whoever decided not to have a fireplace in here. Then the room shakes violently. Lucifer’s piercing eyes focus on me, and I wish I had Moni’s ability to shrink as I force down the lump in my throat, leaning back to hide behind Ryker’s frame.
“Well, I can see they are a lively bunch.” The dark blue Demon laughs, leaving a seat between him and Lucifer. Is that a British accent I hear? I definitely have a thing for accents.
“That’s only the half of it, Murmur,” Lucifer says, cocking an eyebrow in our direction.
Hmm. Murmur. What kind of name is that?
The blue Demon glances over our group and smiles once his eyes come in my vicinity. “How’s it going Ry?”
His skin is like Mystique’s color in the X-Men franchise, and I wonder if it allows him to change shapes as she could. His brown hair is cut short on the sides, but it’s longer and shaggier on top and doesn’t seem to hide any horns. He looks like he rides a motorcycle, since he’s decked out in a leather jacket and black pants. His black and blue wings look like leather too as they lay against his back, but what really grabs my attention is the blue monstrosity that is his tail. As he grabs his napkin and tucks it in his shirt, his tail whips out and grabs the pitcher on the table, pouring him a drink. Handy.
“Aww, you know. Accidentally fell into your vault and now we’re being accused of doing it on purpose. Same old shit.” Ryker shrugs.
Murmur snorts and lowers his head to hide a slight smile.
Lilith walks in carrying a pot of what looks like Mac n Cheese, and Astaroth, Bez, and Trometh follow with other dishes. The door opens again once everyone is seated, but this time, I don’t see anyone walk in.
Am I seeing things?
I glance around the room, but it’s not until something brushes up against my leg that I see a red grubby hand reaching for my cup, and I scream, “Fuck!” I scramble out of my seat, bumping into Ryker’s chair before plastering myself against the wall. A commotion of noise erupts—silverware clattering along with chairs scraping—before Fluffers’ growl rises above it all, but I can’t tear my wide eyes from the creature I’m focused on. “What in Hell is that fucking thing?” I scream, pointing next to my chair with a shaky hand. My heart is pumping so hard that my vision waivers for a second. Levi is in front of me in an instant, blocking out the creature.
His hazel eyes take up my focus as his hands become a familiar weight on my shoulders. “Breathe, Rez. It’s okay; that’s just an Arte Demon. They are all males, harmless, and are normally used as servants if they are lucky. Most of them are used as chew toys for other Demons. You are safe.” His insistence and reassurance calm me enough that I can take a deep breath. I slowly let it out while shaking the tension from my body. I feel Knox’s, or maybe it’s Fluffers’, frustration through our link. Nodding my thanks, I smile tightly before he steps away, and I look up to find Lilith giving Levi a look of pride. All of L.A.M.B. gives me curious looks and heat rushes to my cheeks as I blush over causing a scene.
Movement catches my attention as Knox shifts back to his human form and picks up his chair from the floor. He shoots me a questioning look, and I feel his concern through our link. With another deep exhale, I give him a small smile and send back reassurance that I’m fine.
“Sorry,” I mumble as I notice multiple Arte Demons in the room going about their chores before I slowly go back to my seat. Not even a mother could even love an Arte Demon. The nearest one stands at knee height, covered in layers of wrinkly red skin while it moves on its two hind legs. A stubby red tail lashes behind it like a cat, and it has two small leather wings, which look like they can’t possibly hold its weight. My theory is proven correct when it hops up and grabs my cup off the table and its wings flap wildly, only to slow its descent to the ground. It fills my cup with what looks like Fae Wine and hops back up to replace my drink. Each hand and foot has four digits, and it looks like it has little suckers at the end of its fingers and toes. I’ve seen some crazy things since coming to Purgatory, but this one caught me unexpectedly.
“Thank you,” I say, not sure if it even understands what I’m saying, but my mom didn’t raise me to be rude.
The Demon looks at me, and I flinch as I finally get to see its face. Its ET-shaped head is like a mega peanut with two bull-like horns coming out of the skull. Gigantic eyes take up most of its face. I don’t even know how to explain its mouth. Think of a snout with teeth that are way too big, and it looks like it’s missing its lower jaw—or it’s just so small that I can’t see it from this angle. Either way, I’m not about to ask to see it. It has two holes on the snout that I can only imagine is the Demon’s nose.
The creature’s tongue flicks out and hits an overly large eye, sticking there as it observes me. Cocking its head to the side, it watches me before quickly bowing and making a sound in the back of its throat like a growl or a toad choking. I stand upright again, noticing its tongue is still stuck to its eyeball. It blinks before stubby arms frantically swipe at its tongue, trying unsuccessfully to dislodge it.
Um, gross.
Glancing around the table, everyone is busy with their own servers and getting settled that they aren’t paying us any attention. Inwardly groaning, I quickly whisper, “Sorry,” before pulling its rough yet slimy tongue free and wiping my hand on my pants.
“Hrmjc oep.”
“Huh?”
“It said thank you,” Levi interrupts. “Here, give me your hand so I can clean it.” He grabs my palm and mumbles a few words, leaving my hand tingling as the saliva washes off me. When he finishes, Lilith stands to gain the room's attention. She hasn’t addressed me the entire time I’ve been here, which, gratefully, hasn’t been long. I don’t find that a hardship at all, though, since we didn’t have the best relationship to begin with. Besides, if what Levi said is true, which I have no reason not to believe, she wasn’t herself then, and now, she’s making up for lost time with her boys.
“Look at my boys! All grown up and in the same room with their momma. You guys mean the world to me—” Her voice catches, and she lightly dabs at her eye before continuing. “I finally get this second chance to be your mother, and I get to start that the right way by preparing your favorite meals and having our first family dinner together. The only way this would be more perfect is if your fathers were also here, but sadly, they are still at the academy, taking care of things. They are dealing with a lot, and if you all go back tonight, you might be in the way. So, I think it’s best if you stay. Hopefully, they can join us tomorrow morning for breakfast.” She smiles wistfully and looks over the table again. “Let this be our first of many family dinners! Dinner is served,” she announces and waves her hand.
The lids on the food trays suddenly lift and fly into the kitchen, unveiling a smorgasbord of food before us. Some I’ve never seen before, but a few look familiar—like the mac n cheese and tullë strips. I’m about to ask Ryker if he can pass down a bowl when the trays levitate and slowly start moving around the table on their own, like a carousel.
What the hell?
“Now that’s what you call presentation,” JP says in awe. One tray lays a piece of meat on his plate before adding a clear liquid to it. Then a flame appears out of nowhere, searing it to a toasty finish. “This is impressive. Thank you, Lilith.”
She smiles and nods as she takes a bite of her own food. I sit back and watch as the Beauty and the Beast live-action dinner party meets the Alice in Wonderland tea party and plays out in front of me. The only thing missing is freaking music. I lean over to Ryker and whisper, “Is this normal?”
